I don't know how more people aren't depressed

I think when you're depressed, it's difficult to imagine how other people can possibly be happy. Because the world feels so dark and hopeless to you. You see people around you who aren't depressed and think, how is that possible?

Equally if you've never felt depressed, you can't understand how it feels. You can't picture how a nice walk outside, a cup of coffee and a warm bath can't cheer someone up, because it works for you (a person without depression)

I have been on both sides - I have had periods of depression and periods without. My mindset is completely different in each.

OP I'm so sorry to hear how much you've struggled and that you haven't found a treatment that helps. I'm guessing you probably have tried it already, but I know some psychiatrists prescribe antipsychotics alongside antidepressants for treatment resistant depression?

Really appreciate this response. Puts things into perspective.

Hope you're ok and seizures are better managed?

That theory was debunked many decades ago. I am talking about all 'mental issues'. You really need to keep up to date with research!

Answer me this - if it is a chemical imbalance - what tests do they do? What chemical levels are normal? What units of measurements are the chemicals measured in? What is the imbalance - high or low? How often do these get tested?

This

Isn't that how life has always been for many, many, people - and yet somehow most of them managed to find something to be happy about?

I've never earned a lot of money, and haven't been away on holiday for decades, but I always found something to give me joy. I always looked on working as that my real life started when I walked out the door. Most of us have to work, it's just a part of life. You at least own your own home - I will be renting for the rest of my life.

This is navel gazing tosh.

It is NOT a 'trauma response'! It is a chemical imbalance in the brain and thus akin to a physical illness. You are talking about PTSD, which isn't the same thing at all.

I agree that the OP needs to think more positively, but I don't agree that life is 'pretty shit'. Why the relentless pessimism? Not knocking you specifically because the rest of your post is spot on, but I see this 'life is tough and crap' stuff a lot and I just don't agree. I'm not saying life is always wonderful, but I must say I find it good rather than not.

Wonderful post and so true

Depression is not abnormal or an illness. It is a trauma response.

It is not in any way shape or form comparable to physical illnesses.

I think a lot more people than you realise suffer from anxiety and depression, depression is still quite a taboo subject and very few people will admit to having it and go to great lengths to disguise it

I don’t know if I’m depressed or not but I certainly find life completely boring, most weeks/ months / years are just the same old ding dong, nothing interesting ever really happens and the older you get the quicker time goes by so you can almost see your life flashing before your eyes….. sometimes can’t believe I’m 48, seems like a few years ago I was in my early thirties!

I've had depression and been hospitalised due to suicide attempts.
Life is tough and feeling hopelessness is devastating. But it isn't all shit and changes can be made for the better.
I strengthen my coping mechanisms and (was finally allowed to) made the changes I needed to. My resilience is now sky high and depression is decades behind me. You have to make it work for you, validate your feelings and be your own cheerleader.
The never ending news is dog shit - turn it off and concentrate on making your day to day the best it can be.
Your job sucks - get a new one. Focus your efforts on getting the role that works for you.

Take your joy from the small things and then unless really horrible things are happening, you will be largely content. I think there is just too much self inflicted pressure to do and buy expensive stuff.

@custardlover amazing post! I so agree with this.

@Springisnear4 I don’t know if you’ve ever read The Body Keeps the Score? It’s a really interesting book about how trauma shows up in the body and sort of questions some of the current beliefs about depression. I recommend it.

I think it seemed you began with the idea that life is crap so you wonder why more people aren’t depressed but it’s a bit different if the issue is you suffer from depression rather than just a mundane life.

But in response to your first post i think life isn’t crap for a lot of people. And it’s not necessarily solely dependent on circumstances.

I cringe a bit when people here say they find happiness through reflecting on how they are so more fortunate than others partly because in many poorer countries I’ve spent time in people seem happier tbh.

Not saying there is no depression or that it’s all sunshine and smiles over there, but I don’t think mentally they’re as badly off as we are here - even if on paper we are more fortunate. So basically it’s not always about what we do or don’t have.

This! 💯

Crikey OP it's hard to reply when our natural instinct is to try and point out the positive, but you say none of that works and you've been depressed pretty much all your life.

OK, Life is, for the vast majority, pretty shit.
You can take joy where you can, if possible, if you can't then it's relentlessly awful.

It is what it is.

I don't say this to make you feel "better" - because you won't.

But here you are. You can wallow in the sheer crapness of it all or try something else.

Really, it's no skin off anyone else's nose whatever you choose is it.

It's your life.

❤️ this

So how do you live?

I totally agree. I think depression is the result of a sane mind in a cruel world.

Man's Search for Meaning

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mans-Search-Meaning-classic-Holocaust/dp/1844132390/ref=ascdff_1844132390?nodl=1&tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=310805565966&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10486856906335975541&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9045928&hvtargid=pla-472856926229&psc=1&mcid=94945a6b788e37be8961699080549b41&th=1&psc=1&dplnkId=c96ad8ad-e579-48bb-b05b-703364a8d3e9

I wonder if satisfaction is a better feeling to aspire to than happiness? My hunch is that a life in which you find purpose is more satisfying than a hedonistic one - a deeper kind of happiness.

This is not a comment on depression which is an illness and requires treatment like any other physical illness.

But I am definitely trying to impress on my DC that a 'successful' life isn't just measured in happiness (and certainly not wealth, fame, physical perfection or status) but rather the trick is a combination deciding to find joy everywhere and focusing on the impact you have on others / the world.

There's a good book called Man's Search for Meaning which might be inspiring.

And I hope this isn't horribly tone deaf or patronising - like I said, not commenting on medical depression.

OP, just a suggestion that you may have tried so feel free to ignore if you have. I know you said you'd tried various different anti depressants. Have you ever tried a combination? I have "treatment resistant" depression but am on a combo of venlafaxine and mirtazapine and its changed my life.

I haven't stopped seeing the "pointlessness" of life. I'm still aware of it. But I no longer care about it, if that makes sense. I still see the futility but I can find joy in things now. I can see a reason to get up each day and to keep going. It's like I can see life is meaningless but I don't care anymore! Which is actually a win. I live day by day and would say that I am happy as much as anyone can be.

People always say this. I doubt that they would find life more congenial under communism. Now, I do agree that the way capitalism works in this country and in the US is not conducive to maximum happiness, but that is because our governments have lost sight of what makes people productive. Capitalism itself is not the problem, it is the way it is managed.

I meant to say comparison is the thief of joy