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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To stick to terms of agreement with friends

265 replies

Bungybungy · 14/03/2024 10:05

Burner account. I’ve been friends with F for decades. She had a large social media presence. I’ve worked hard to establish my business and have been successful. I’m proud of what I’ve achieved. 5 years ago, F came to me with a business idea, wanting to set up herself. She didn’t at that time have the funds to set up by herself so I agreed to invest a not insignificant sum in return for 20% of the business. She was happy with that deal, and because I work in legal services, I got our guy who deals with contracts to draw up an agreement specifying what rights and responsibilities etc. Although this was an area she had worked in before, she had never actually run a business before. I guess that’s why she came to me in part, so it wasn’t just about the money. To her credit, and using my advice, the business has grown quickly and is well known. At the time of the investment I understood that I could just as easily have lost my money completely.

Our relationship is now very difficult as I’ve realised over the last 2 years that she’s been distancing herself from me, which is fine, relationships come and go, but last week I got a letter from her solicitor telling me that she was unhappy with my ownership and that she wanted to buy me out for just over my initial investment. Given the business is now worth several times over my initial investment, I can’t accept that (she put close to no money in herself). For her to pay me off would cost her 5 times my initial investment. AIBU to expect her to honour the agreement? I know she’s contractually bound but she’s been so vile about this, I’m second guessing myself. She keeps threatening to “out” my business via her social media(I have no idea what this means). I’m actually scared about what she could do.

OP posts:
Bungybungy · 07/04/2024 19:31

Dontbeme · 07/04/2024 19:29

Just sent you a message, how much popcorn should I stock up on?

Thank you!! It’s more so I can actively monitor than post but thank
you xx

OP posts:
fuzzleberry · 07/04/2024 19:30

@Dontbeme how many can you invite? 👀 I've got huge fomo now!

Dontbeme · 07/04/2024 19:29

Bungybungy · 07/04/2024 18:47

On a completely unrelated note: anyone got a Tattle Life invite they can give me? 🤬

Just sent you a message, how much popcorn should I stock up on?

ThinWomansBrain · 07/04/2024 19:06

Is her business listed?/
If not, who has valued the business/what basis is it valued on?

Bungybungy · 07/04/2024 19:01

LenaLamont · 07/04/2024 18:53

ooooooooooo! What's occurring, OP?

Can’t go into details because it’s getting ridiculous and weird but I’d like to join Tattle as a matter of urgency.

OP posts:
LenaLamont · 07/04/2024 18:58

(I just Googled what Tattle Life is, so CRIKEY!)

LenaLamont · 07/04/2024 18:53

ooooooooooo! What's occurring, OP?

Bungybungy · 07/04/2024 18:49

fuzzleberry · 07/04/2024 18:48

You can't just start posting there? I never knew that

Apparently not.

OP posts:
HalebiHabibti · 07/04/2024 18:49

Ooh.

<placemarks for further updates>

fuzzleberry · 07/04/2024 18:48

Bungybungy · 07/04/2024 18:47

On a completely unrelated note: anyone got a Tattle Life invite they can give me? 🤬

You can't just start posting there? I never knew that

Bungybungy · 07/04/2024 18:47

On a completely unrelated note: anyone got a Tattle Life invite they can give me? 🤬

OP posts:
Riverlee · 18/03/2024 20:07

@Backmarks Thank you, a great way of remembering the difference.

Backmarks · 18/03/2024 19:28

Riverlee · 17/03/2024 14:33

Isn’t any defamatory comments on sm etc slander (or libel, never remember which is which).

Basically you’ve been a ‘dragon’ (as in Dragons den ) to her and should reap the rewards.

Off topic, but I used to get these mixed up too, till I figured it out as follows...

"Lib" for libel, and "lib" for library - libel is written.

"S" for slander and "s" for speaking - slander is spoken.

DisabledDemon · 17/03/2024 18:33

Has she not watched Dragons Den? You make an investment, you expect a profit!

Riverlee · 17/03/2024 14:33

Isn’t any defamatory comments on sm etc slander (or libel, never remember which is which).

Basically you’ve been a ‘dragon’ (as in Dragons den ) to her and should reap the rewards.

ITryHarder · 17/03/2024 14:30

PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 17/03/2024 04:25

Maybe read at least the OP’s messages on a 9 page thread before posting… she did this 5 pages ago 🙄

Huh, I'm often the one to think that of someone else's post, but I'm not rude or obnoxious enough to say it because unlike righteously perfect you, I realize people error even when their intentions are good. Is it a recognition thing with you that you feel the need to point out the flaws of others? Does it make you feel a power you crave? Maybe therapy would help.

lala567 · 17/03/2024 11:08

BigBrotherDoesntKnowWhatACelebrityIs · 16/03/2024 21:26

Please keep us updated OP. We are all v invested!

Did you not read her update to say she would not be updating 😂

IReallyStillCantBeBothered · 17/03/2024 10:11

Pupinskipops · 16/03/2024 20:50

If she's contractually bound, deal directly with her solicitor only. Keep it out of the friendship. You might lose the friendship but if she's being that vile it doesn't sound like a friendship worth saving.

I imagine her that to "out" your business is an empty threat, particularly if you don't know what she could have on you. She will know that that could open the door to a public attack on her own business practices if you were so inclined (I'm sure you're not!) as you actually do have something on her, and her unwillingness to honour the terms of contracts she enters into.

You might lose the friendship but if she's being that vile it doesn't sound like a friendship worth saving.

The friendship is over.

LindaMo2 · 17/03/2024 09:25

It was a secured business investment. It was not a personal loan. She knew that at the time. She should honour your agreement or risk being outed as someone not trustworthy enough for anyone to invest in.

everythingthelighttouches · 17/03/2024 09:11

andHelenknowsimmiserablenow · 14/03/2024 10:31

Get your solicitor to issue a cease and desist letter regarding her threats immediately.

This is exactly what I was going to say.

Do you have evidence of her threats? Did she put this in a text or was it verbal?

Another reason to only deal with her through solicitors.

It is possible the solicitor she has now engaged is completely unaware of these threats. If you issue a cease and desist, her own solicitor will be telling her to stop with the threats!!

BlueFlowers5 · 17/03/2024 08:59

I might consider asking her for 2 times your original investment on your stating your investment is now worth 5 X that.

Scarletttulips · 17/03/2024 08:06

As people have said. Everything through a solicitor. Look for one who has mediation disputes experience etc. If you have legal insurance this can be used

Shes already send a solicitor letter.

poppingpea · 17/03/2024 07:59

Bungybungy · 14/03/2024 10:22

5 times the investment is what my share of it is approximately worth now

Then that’s how much you should get back. As people have said. Everything through a solicitor. Look for one who has mediation disputes experience etc. If you have legal insurance this can be used.

hand it over so it’s not personal. And she’s not your friend. She may be mean about you but she will do that whether you stand up for yourself or not. So you may as well stand up for yourself and get what’s right.

best wishes to you. It’s going to be a pita but remove the emotion and be happy you took a risk that’s paid off well done you !! 🤗 good luck with the negotiations

PivotPivotmakingmargaritas · 17/03/2024 04:25

ITryHarder · 17/03/2024 03:57

Get your own lawyer to tell hers that you own 20% of whatever the company is valued at NOW, but will settle for 18%. Her own lawyer might advise the wisdom of accepting that deal. If she follows through on her threats, sue her. You have the legally binding contract.

Maybe read at least the OP’s messages on a 9 page thread before posting… she did this 5 pages ago 🙄

ITryHarder · 17/03/2024 03:57

Get your own lawyer to tell hers that you own 20% of whatever the company is valued at NOW, but will settle for 18%. Her own lawyer might advise the wisdom of accepting that deal. If she follows through on her threats, sue her. You have the legally binding contract.

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