AIBU to think we are currently raising the most dull generation yet??

What interests do you what my 7 and 10 year old to have - climate change? War?

my 7 year old talks the socks off anyone who will listen about Beast Quest and Minecraft, with a Roblox here and there and finishes off with football. My 10 year old will talk about Harry Potter and dancing and drama. That’s about it.

I wonder though, if the kids mentioned in the OP are much better conversationalists than you assume?

At some point in primary school, kids learn that talking at people about your latest obsession is actually quite dull if they are not equally interested.

Kids do such a range of activities, but if none of your friends do, then it's not exactly a great topic of conversation, is it? It's natural to default to common ground. And for kids that age, common ground is likely minecraft, gladiators, pokemon, and football. Maybe books and films. But probably not tennis and violin.

I don't see the problem.

I know plenty of teenagers with a huge range of interests. My own teens enjoy Boxing, Piano, Viola, Chess, Basketball, Russian, Chinese, Cookery, Skiing, Gym and Running between them! (And yes, they also like TikTok etc as well).

I agree with the private school secondary teacher. Big difference between over scheduled kids who do clubs and extra curricular and kids who are capable of having a conversation with an adult and who are not boring.

Our school will put Newsround on for the juniors but I was giving a lift back to a child (age 9) generally considered to be bright and outstanding at sport, and we were talking about current affairs and they hadn't a scooby.

I think there is too much focus on excellent parenting / well rounded kids = extra curricular.

Yes I agree, my primary school aged child does exactly the same activities and honestly, I’ve never heard her strike up a convo about these topics. So it seems irrelevant to me, at nearly 7, that she shares these interests with her peers.

OP, I think kids are great at communicating non-verbally too. I’ve often seen kids not say one word to each other, and literally seconds later, they are chasing each other around, laughing their heads off and making up ‘rules’ for this ‘game’. Kids still often play in the moment, allowing the environment to support spontaneous interactions and play.

It sounds tough that your kids are struggling with their peers but I don’t think that makes other kids ‘dull’ - especially not an entire generation.

I get what you’re saying, though I don’t agree it’s the vast majority. However, it’s the way we’ve shaped society- so many parents now have to both work long non child friendly hours which means kids are being left in after school clubs (which are serviceable but rarely particularly brilliant). Many parents then don’t want to spend what little time they have at activities or spend the ££ when everything costs so much. The number of kids at our local primary that can’t swim is horrifying - it’s a really important life skill but many parents don’t have the time or cash to prioritise it - school now only take the non swimmers when they have time scheduled at the local pool in an effort to try & make a difference. Technology is great for so many things but yes, I think we’re doing more harm than good sadly. Oh & the poster who mentioned resilience is also correct I think…. Friend of mine is a ceo of a large national company - she asked one of the grads on the training program to make a call recently and they said “oh sorry, I don’t like speaking to people I don’t know” - she was horrified….and I think has taken a much more significant interest in the hiring process since!!

To add to my post. My 10 year old DC does have one friend that only seems to game. He does no after school activities or clubs and has never stuck to anything, tried a couple of sports and decided didn’t like, quit a musical instrument after only one lesson and parents just say ok. I worry about him having zero resilience.

I have 2 DC, one is 13 one is 10
Although they do enjoying gaming ( chatting to friends on headsets ) they are also really sporty and play football for teams and swim and will play cricket in the summer.
my 13 year old also loves hanging out chatting with friends, they walk in to Town and buy a drink and walk and talk for hours. Often their mates will come over and they’re all so different and enjoy different things, Rubik’s cubes, ones ace at chess and some do drama. They’ve never seemed dull to me, full of chat and fun.

I think being able to navigate boredom is one of the best things for a child. By the time you're in your mid-teens, it's almost too late.

I totally agree with this post and am quite sure the only ones disagreeing are those whose own kids do nothing but sitting on their phones or gaming consoles.

As a parent, my kids can have as much screen time as they want, BUT... they have to earn it with like for like minutes doing other activities. And no social media, TikTok etc...

As a teacher (Y7 to Y13) I despair at the amount of utterly dull children who have no interests other than social media or gaming. So many don't do sports, play instruments, go to clubs etc... just nothing. We run loads of clubs at school that are all free, but instead they prefer to sit and moan that they can't use their phones at school rather than try something new. When I suggest giving something a go, it's "boring".

Then in lessons they struggle to think for themselves unless it involves a screen leading them.

The numbers of kids as I describe above is increasing and it's really sad to see.

Households have two FT working parents now normally, so when they are at home they are doing housework and life admin. No time for interaction with kids, so some will gravitate towards phones and screens. It's just modern living unfortunately. I'm trying to get my son more clubs so he mixes more and has interests, and he is reluctant still. I try to give them some time each day. I would send him out to play more, but unfortunately there are dickheads with XL Bully's in my street.

It doesn't help that schools lay on more bollocks admin to people's loads now too.

I have 3 teenagers

DS age 13 wants to be a palaeontologist and can talk at length about all things dinosaur, he does like youtube and gaming too though.
DS age 17 likes geography, space and wants to work for a space agency. He is a sponge and absorbs knowledge so can talk about a huge variety of subjects and is out secret weapon for pub quizzes!
DD is 15 and very creative, loves music and going to gigs, sews on her machine, loves to cook/bake etc.

My Nephew is 13 and loves space and going out to loook at the stars.
Niece is 10 and into cross country running, crafts etc.

I think all kids will have some sort of hobby or special interest. At least in my experience. But maybe we are just surrounded by people like us (and it is a fairly 'middle class' area so kids do activities and go to museums etc) - it may be that those with less access to activities and days out are more likely to just be on screens all the time

Mine is 8, i don't see what you do. He loves the theatre, movies, music, has a comic book subscription, loves reading, goes to cubs.

His peers do various extra curricular activities - dance, kick boxing, art, beavers. My niece does gymnastics/ dance, my nephew does Beavers and is into Lego. Yes they all love a screen but they're going on adventures not scrolling SM.

It sounds like you feel your kids are just too fun and interesting for their peers but surely a well rounded child would be able to meet their peers where they are.

I'm not sure it's something to blame the current generation for?

Growing up I was horse mad and musical, however my school friends (primary and then secondary) didn't have any strong interests/hobbies/extracurricular activities, or at least not until they were old enough to get into music/concerts etc. It didn't have any impact on our ability as a group to communicate though, and I'm still close friends with 4 of them 20+ years later (where all 5 of us now have completely different hobbies and interests to each other, many of which developed as adults).

A family friend's 14 year old daughter helps out at our stables; she rides, plays cricket and netball multiple times a week outside of school and has gotten into photography with my guidance and help (now doing some paid freelance work as a result). Her young siblings are into motorbikes and horse riding and football. My group of friends have children ranging from 2 to 8, all of which are swimming, doing gymnastics, playing football, judo/karate, motorbikes, gardening(!), raising various pets. I'm not surrounded by people raising dull children and I surely can't be in the minority?!

Mine are 10 and 8. They have friends who play instruments, go to drama classes, dance classes, dance gymnastics, play sports, run in cross country competitions, swim for local clubs… all sorts.

yawn.

Primary school children cannot choose interests it comes down to if the parents have the money and the time to allow them to do these.
Our Daughter has always done 2 extra curricular activities but this is down to us paying for and having the time to take her.

I can sort of see what you are saying. My nine year old spends a lot of time on her devices. However, a lot of the time she isn’t just mindlessly scrolling or staring at YouTube. She also spends time chatting to her friends on FaceTime. So as well as being used for social media and gaming it’s also how they engage with their friends now, at least the ones that live a bit further away and less straightforward to just go out and play with them or organise play dates. I think that’s a good thing.
She also does dancing and swimming at the weekends, she reads for a while in the evenings and likes being read to, she likes crafty things like making jewellery, goes to play with friends when it’s dry and they hang out at a park nearby or ride their bikes or scooters.
Are these classed as interests? True there is a lot of chat about her favourite YouTubers and influencers but she has other interests too and is far from what I would describe as dull, nor are any of her friends that I know.

I agree with you op. Kids these days don't even watch tv shows or films or pick up a book, let alone have other hobbies. They're mainly gaming or on YouTube and TikTok which is killing their focus.

I'm sure there are plenty of dcs who do have interests and watch films and so on but I'm referring to a large portion of society now which seems to be increasing.

I think this is total rubbish tbh. Do you spend much time with kids? I have two pre-teens and work with teenagers, and I can always find things to talk about.

You are saying kids don't have interests, but I think you mean you don't approve of their interests. Gaming is an interest, so is social media.

This reminds me of 18th century adults complaining about young people reading books. Things change, different generations like different things.

I am in Ireland but not a huge difference to the UK and I don't recognise what you're seeing. I coach my 11 year old daughters GAA football team and they are the liveliest, fittest, fun, cheeky confident bunch of girls (about 70 girls so a huge range of personalities). Yeah they are doing their tic toc dances and can be a bit giddy at times but they are bright and confident and I feel happy knowing the future is safe with them in it.

My teens and their friends seem fine. Gaming is an interest but they all seem to have other interests too. And most have jobs once they get past 16. But actually they had their very early years without smartphones and ipads were realead when they were toddlers They were expensive luxuries so not common straight away.

I dont know about younger ones. I work in infant school in the office and there are issue with language aquisition but i cant say the children lack interests.

But who are her interesting kids going to socialise with if all the other kids are so boring?

I hate when older people act as though “TikTok” is a subject in itself. If kids are looking at TT/Youtube etc it is probably centred on an interest. The normal things for kids/teens - cartoons, pop singers, fashion, makeup, video games, tv programmes, films, crafts, baking etc.

It’s ignorant to dismiss all of social media/internet/screens as Bad Things.

I am 60 and work with 10 people 18 to 48. ALL are attached to their phones, talk incessantly about reality TV or some crap about the royal family. So noooooo I don't think this generation of kids is the most boring at all.