Posters you still think about

opheliarose!

I wonder about that woman with the controlling husband too. As, I see, do some other posters.

I didn't know there's someone currently posting about a similar situation. I wish her all the best.

The lady posted not that long ago who was a shell. In northern Ireland with a controlling partner who basically raped her routinely because no wasn't an option in their marriage. She was desperate but he had her thinking up was down. So much encouragement and support but she faded out from her thread and, I expect, is still there judging by how far she seemed to be from feeling an escape was possible. 😞

I always wondered if she was indeed giving her own personal perspectives on every matter she engaged in, or whether the name was a giveaway clue and she was thus just 'aggregating' what she believed the average woman/man on the street would say?!

Ooh, yes - that one was rather a fascinating thread. I wonder what happened in the end.

Did we ever find out what happened about the OP who accidentally broke a wine glass at her (wealthy) in-laws' home (was that over Christmas too, maybe a previous year now?) and they issued her an actual invoice to pay for it?!

Any fucker is my favourite too! She cuts to the chase quicker and better than anyone!

The last one is horrible :(
I remember watching a documentary about a woman in a similar situation who was abused by both her husband and in law. She had to flee the country illegally by boat to go a neighbouring country that had a different law

One poster was a woman in her 30's (I think) who was pregnant by a guy she'd been friends with while travelling (round India?). She was trying to decide what to do and working out if solo parenting could be done with her life in London, she knew the father wouldn't want to play an active role, but no hard feelings. Her name was something like India.
She seemed so intelligent and pragmatic but also fun, and I got the impression she'd be an ace mum, if she felt like she could go it alone and could make it work.
I occasionally wonder what choice she made in the end. Her child would be at school now!

And another one for the lady stuck in a horrible toxic situation in NZ, desperate to take her kids to the UK but trapped by the laws on removing children (laws there for good reason, but her DH and his family were 😱) and she wasn't going to abandon them to him without her. Hope she's found some way to improve some part of that.

@lollipopnow I'm so pleased to see your name pop up. I was on your threads at the time and was so proud of you for getting away.

On a more light hearted note, I spend most of January thinking of the posters who made threads in December about potential Christmas issues who never came back to update. There was a batshit one this year about a SiL who expected the entire meal to be dairy free for her son and wouldn't accept the OPs compromise of a regular meal for all and a dairy free version for the child in question.

Yay! So glad things are well with you and your ds.

I often think of Fluffy. Absolutely tragic.

Pretty much all of us have been affected by domestic violence, though. Whether it's a partner, a parent, stories of our grandparents, uncles, a violent brother (in my case). And if not that, we've been sexually assaulted in some way, a lot of us. I would suggest it's a lot less skewed than you might think.

Oh no, JanH was indeed lovely. She was always a thoroughly calm and reasoned thinker. I'm sad to read this, RIP JanH.

Yes, so good to discover this - I found her recent update after I posted. @Purpledragonz if that’s who you meant, the poster I’m talking about was called onitlikeacarbonnet and as she recently posted, she started her threads 7 years ago so probably not the one you’re thinking of?

OpheliaRose.

I hope she’s doing ok now

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/relationships/2359412-Affair-Not-sure-how-to-cope

The poster Thewookiemustgo or something similar - always gave good insight on the Relationships board. There was another poster who did similarly but I can't remember the name - think it began with a C.
Both of them spoke from experience of being cheated on and both were very wise.

one thread was about 9 years ago I think. The OP who also had young children found out her husband had been cheating with someone from work, at first he referred to this woman as ‘wank fodder’ but eventually the full truth came out and he left to be with this woman. There were several threads from the OP and I remember feeling the heartbreak whilst reading.

Pamela posts were very moving thats one thread that stayed with me very sad

Your the one that is generalising based on threads you have read on here .

Do you have more details on the first poster? Was it around 2021?
Was she pregnant at the time ?

im pretty sure you’re thinking of someone else b

@x2boys whose life is it representative of if not these women? I'm sure their lives feel very real to them. These abusive men are also presumably real.

Perhaps what you intended to say was "these threads about abuse are not representative of what I see in my own life".

Yes, might have been.
Hilarious thread, early in my MN career.

Hello! I am still here albeit under a different username and it transpires my old one is no longer available as I deleted my old account shorty after that update. So I changed from my current username to this one for the update.

the kids are doing great. The baby i was pregnant with when we left is now six years old! Time has flown….. We are a strong little team and he is not a part of their lives. I am so proud of them - they are just amazing human beings.

thought you might like to know and thank you for thinking of us ☺️

Mumsnet isn't representative of real life ,threads about domestic violence are going to attract posters who have been affected by domestic violence
So makes things very skewed