To find it embarrassing that my nans buys Mother’s Day presents?

Maybe suggest putting in on something more exspensive? So let's say nan spends £40 on gifts. If you say, hi nan, mum would love a... we were all thinking we could all chip in this year and get her it, what do you think?

ZOMBIE THREAD!
Mother's Day was back in March 😂😂😂

Why is that embarrassing? Just get your own gift too so your mum has more gifts? I’m sure she wouldn’t complain!

Is your mum a single mum? My friend is and her mum buys the presents on behalf of the kids but she takes them to choose something for their mum and pays for it. At your age I'd have long since had the conversation with my nan about this. You don't need to wait till next year to have the conversation. Do it now and then just remind her before she would normally purchase the gifts that you are getting something for mum so she no longer has to and thank her for all the effort she has gone to on your behalf. Be prepared that she might still get her daughter something anyway.

Tbh at your age I'd be getting my nan a little token something too. My grandparents are long gone but when I was 18 I would always get my nan some flowers on behalf of my siblings and she'd always be so chuffed. If you and your siblings can stretch to it maybe take both your mum and nan out for a meal.

There are family things that sure if people sat down and thought deeply about it then it makes no sense but no harm is being done

To me this is a inwardly roll my eyes thing and move on

No idea what is embarrassing about it though nor why it stops anything

My mum buys me a Mother’s Day present because she wants to show me how proud she is of me as a mother. I’ve raised my boys alone and they are young adults now, but as I have no appreciation from their father she wants to support me.
If the boys get me something too, I’m doubly happy, but it’s nice my own mum values the job I have done raising them.

There's nothing stopping you buying more than flowers.
Oops, apologies for not noticing this was a resurrected thread. 🫣

@Pertinentowl It's six months ago. Why resurrect a zombie thread?!

You’ve just admitted you don’t get her anything as you Nan already has, so she probably thinks you’ll forget! Start getting her stuff AS WELL. Then your nan will see you can do it. Your mum can get loads of gifts.

My MIL buys mother's day presents for me from my DC even though one is a young adult. She clearly enjoys it so we've never challenged it. But the DC have always also chosen me a present themselves (with DH when they were young and for themselves now that they are young adults). The presents chosen by MIL are very different from the things that the DC choose. I do think it's a bit odd that she continues to do this and most of her gifts aren't really to my taste but in the scheme of things if it's something she wants to do I can't see a point in insisting that she stops and sometimes it's chocolate

I don’t understand why there’s no gift for the nan as well as the mum. The sisters should be on top of that. Afternoon tea or something

This is a great idea, your nan buys the physical gifts, but you take your mum out to do something special together.

This way your mum will know how much you appreciate her, and your nan will enjoy carrying on the tradition

I think it's sweet. If mum and grandma get on could you do something like take them both out for afternoon tea and spoil them both? Flowers for both?

You get such a short amount of time with your grandparents you should treasure every opportunity

Pretend it's not mother's day. The date is meaningless
Isn't it nice for you nan just to buy a gift for her grandkids now and then.

A complete non issue

What is meant by 'I dont think my grandad likes it either'

What doesnt he like, the money aspect or something? Or does he perceive that you girls havent got your own presents together so his wife has to continue to do it?

Just get presents as well, it wont undermine nan at all and is more presents for mum. She might still continue to get the presents or she might then feel confident that her grandaughters are on it and will get presents and cards.

Either way, mum gets a nice day. Does nan get anything for herself from everyone?

Indeed! Pretty poor.

This.
There's a very simple way to keep everyone happy, op... Not difficult at all.

This is lovely of your nan (as long as it’s not being done maliciously), I’d let her carry on and just buy your own stuff too, I’m sure your mum won’t mind twice the amount of presents.

Get something as well as the gifts your nan has got

So from your mother's perspective, she has 3 adult children not one of whom has ever been arsed to get her something for mother's day? That's really poor.

No.

No

Well, it might but if you're worried about that, why not have the conversation with her?

Thank her, explain that you want to do the choosing.

Either she'll carry on getting your mum something, or she'll leave it to you.

How did this not come up 5+ years ago?

This. Why cant you just buy her the gift you wanted anyway? Or if your nan so happens to have got it already, get somthing else she likes?

Either tell her we'll in advance that you'll get your own orese ts next year, or your mum has presents from you and her.