To think this woman shouldn’t have interfered in the restaurant?

It was a pub with a play area. They are actively encouraging people to come there with their kids.

Personally, if I want to avoid children, I would most definitely choose a different place to eat. Or at least sit as far away from the play area as possible.

’last night’ was probably Saturday at 6pm in a pub with soft play. There were other families in there at the same time, as you’d expect.

Goodness how did you manage to turn your poor parenting into the fault of a woman sitting sideways on her chair.

Incredible, you need to improve your parenting, regardless of your comments you can not possibly have been parenting well. If you were it would result in you apologising to those sitting close by and either taking your child out of the restaurant and home or their behaviour improving.

'Shrieking'...of course she was OP...🙄

You cannot have it all, once you have kids, I am afraid. Either home , kids settled to bed on time, either childcare and then out, either keep the dining out as a whole family for easy lazy weekend afternoons.

I agree.

but reading this I also can’t help but wonder who this “we” was who couldn’t deal with their DS.

It was stressful and meant we couldn’t deal with DS properly as she was taking our attention.

it sounds to me as if an other parent was present tbh.

So why was the OP the one that was “really trying”? Why not both parents? Why should OP be the one to take DS outside instead of the other parent?

She did t react badly.

You under reacted.

He should have been removed the time he swung in his chair after being wanted not to.

Like you said he knows how to behave in a restaurant so his choice not to should have had consequences.

What time in the evening did you eat?

If your attention was diverted by her, is it truly that difficult to believe that her attention was diverted by him?

He’s normally really good in restaurants but was admittedly being really silly and swinging back on his chair and running off and not eating. I was doing my best to deal with it.

I have read most of your updates but I’m still not sure what you (or whoever else was with you. Potentially his father?) actually did do to deal with it…

you have said ' i do accept we shouldn’t have taken DS, as I can’t control him at all so we reliant on his cooperation which obviously wasn’t happening. '

and

' I was trying, I really was. '

Try harder !

You ask others opinion but then don’t accept it. Schools meet parents like you all the time, who don’t accept others’ views on their little darlings. It never ends well.

What an appalling child, and mother for allowing such behaviour to continue.

Seriously?! 🤦🏻‍♀️

tiredinoratia · Today 07:41

You were in a public place and your child is a member of the public. He was displaying developmentally appropriate behaviour and you were parenting him. She sounds like she was making a point by pretending to be concerned to make herself feel superior. A little patience and compassion and minding your own business unless you are actually being helpful is so important. Let it go. She is also a member of the public and as much as she didn't seem to be able to make concessions for you, you can for her. She was trying to shame you because of her own insecurities. Wish her well and move on secure in your own parenting choices and skills”

What a load of rubbish.

What, waste the money they've paid for their meal at a child-friendly restaurant with a soft play area because her over-excited DS was annoying a child-free woman at the next table?

Yes, of course that's what she should have done - NOT!

Op, You said yourself he was “Playing Up”.

Sounded like she was actually worried for your 3 year old. If mine did that, I'd quietly take them outside and tell them if they don't behave, we'd have to go home.

' being really silly and swinging back on his chair and running off and not eating.'

and you are shifting the blame on this other customer for having angled her chair - can you hear yourself !!!

Wow lots of self righteous posters here! Of course the woman was unreasonable. It's a pub with a children's play area, not a romantic restaurant. If you go to a pub with a family play area there will be children running about. Don't like that, go elsewhere. All I think when I see children messing around is thank goodness I don't have that now! The OP said she was trying to deal with it, we all know under 5s are devils. Next time take him to the car or feed him before he goes so it's less stressful for you, but don't worry about judgements from others. You're doing the best you can like all of us.

I would never say anything about a badly behaved child - it’s not my role and it’s really the parents call! However, if a child is in danger, I have a few times gently said to parent or intervened - I’ve saved a kid from
drowning (parents so appreciative), stopped a toddler running out in front of car (parents less appreciative but thanked me grumpily), found lost child and returned to parents (very grateful until I checked that they were actually his parents, then they felt somehow affronted). I work in a children’s hospital and it can feel like a balance between not interfering and saving a nasty injury. Toddlers swinging back on chairs is dangerous and you handle it by removing the dangerous item. She probably was really scared your child would hurt himself and maybe felt it was worth annoying you slightly to keep your kiddo safe.

this.

When I go out for a meal (often with our GC), I expect any kids to behave properly, and for the parents to ensure that they do. Our GC take colouring books/cards/comics/iPad or something to keep them occupied before and after the meal. The parents certainly wouldn't allow poor behaviour from any of them.

Jesus, it sounded like a ghastly family-friendly pub. Noisy kids are to be expected. She was seated near an indoor soft play FFS. Shrieking ‘he’ll fall!’ doesn’t help anything. 😂

You should have taken him out. If he had run into someone with a tray of food or hot drinks he could have been hurt. Though it was a family pub and children often do run around. Doesn't mean the parents should let them.

Exactly

Which is exactly what I would expect you to say if you are the type to allow your child to potentially injure themselves at a restaurant.

There was a thread just yesterday about kids messing around in the supermarket and when the OP called them out on it, the mum/nan told her to mind her own business.

Some people just don’t care.

Kid running about in a restaurant with hot food,trays of drinks on the go ....what could possibly go wrong?.