To be surprised that 65+ is deemed ‘elderly’

It's an accurate description, I don't use old as an insult.
Same with young - "X is a young woman with blonde hair in room 123" - literally just used as a description so people can locate the right colleague without interrupting an entire room full of people asking if they are X person.

You will have had the term 'elderly primigravida' on your medical notes.
Although your midwife was right; it's no big deal.

I wasn't 20 years ago. 1st and only baby at 40. Apparently according to the midwife no big deal. (I was surprised I must admit).

I agree society is ageist 💯 but what doesn’t help is people saying “I’m not old because [ insert positive attribute they associate with young people.]”so for example, I’m close to 50. My marathon time is better than the average 20 year old in any marathon major you care to search- most 20 year olds couldn’t run 5k without stopping, never mind a marathon. Does that make me young? No. It makes me a middle aged woman who can still be good at running. So I feel if we’re ever going to get past ageism it isn’t by denying our age. It’s by not ascribing characteristics to older people that may well not be true. However, this is complicated by the fact that ageing in general does confer physical and cognitive decline to some degree and at population level we need to accommodate that. So we need to not generalise but at policy level we kind of do, so I can see why it’s messed up.

Wow OP you’d put me and my Mum in the same category. She’s had both her knees replaced, cataract surgery, struggles with mobility, needs an afternoon nap, is quite forgetful, very deaf, rarely leaves the house - pretty normal 80 year old.
I’m 56, I work, I run 20 miles per week, ferry DS to football most days, did Go Ape recently, etc. I’m not doing too badly considering I’m “old”!

You are a geriatric mother post thirty five.
It's biologically optimal to bear children between twenty and thirty five

That doesn't necessitate you being of advanced age in anything other than obstetric terminology, it is however wholly correct.

That kind of description (the reference to age) would be considered completely unacceptable in my workplace and I can guarantee would be called out by multiple people.

Fuck off is 55 "old".

(I am 55.)

Then you'd have been aware of women's pension ages rising worldwide? It is irrelevant how many are working, when many have no choice but to work at an increasing age.

If you are unsure why the term "old" is offensive - particularly when used by a younger person of anyone over 50 or so - then recall the popular insult of "OK, Boomer" (mis)applied to that broad age group, as a term of derision and disgust.

Why do we need to be described as anything other than our age? Given that all my friends lost parents in fairly recent years it seems weird to say someone is old, but they still have parents. I generally don't think of people as fitting into some group according to their age, although when talking about someone as elderly I might use that term for someone 80 and over, I certainly would never use it for someone younger.

Btw I have never in my entire life referred to anyone as middle aged either.

Average life expectancy for females is about 83 currently.
I’d say
0-17 childhood
18-30 young adult
31- 48 adult
49-62 middle aged
63-76 older adult
77-83 old
84+ elderly

55 "old"???? Come off it!!

Well thanks for the compliment because it doesn't bother me at all.

I'm not looking forward to any infirmity heading my way but having said that; I'm getting old and I'm bloody beautiful and marvellous and embracing the shit out of the privilege of not having died yet.

I am 58 and suddenly starting to feel older - have more aches etc and some hip pain, and definitely more tired. I still work full-time and go on long walks etc but cannot imagine working full-time until I am 67. My dad died at 57, and both my mother and then my brother got cancer at 60 with their health deteriorating from that point. My DH is 62 and works shifts (including nights) in a physical job - I cannot see him being able to do this for much longer.

@silvergarden I didn’t express surprise anywhere.

I initially admitted that I didn’t know the statistics, but my guess would be that fewer than half were working at 65. Someone has come back to say this is correct. Now, I haven’t verified that, but I’m not surprised at the statistic given.

I would vehemently refute being out of touch on this subject, not least because I specialise in dealing with clients over the age of 60 and take an intense interest in aging.

As for coming back in a few years to find out why old is offensive, well sure I could. But in the meantime I asked the question to those who might know - and I’m interested in the answers!

It would take an incredibly strong character to not be affected on how society views them, there is nothing worse than being ‘old’ in our society no wonder people rally against it.

Just humour me! 😂

I get this a lot at the moment in work, when colleagues are looking for someone they've not met due do mostly wfh. Nobody has called me out for describing people in their 50s as "old".
Regular conversations in the office:
"Do you know who XYZ is and where their office is?"
"yes, old lady with a grey bob, she's in room 123" or "old gentleman with a beard, always wearing a suit, in room 123"

It's not my opinion, it's a generally accepted medical age range:

Middle age | definition of middle age by Medical dictionary (thefreedictionary.com)

Because your retired why would a non elderly person be retired unless very rich. Its because you seen as needing the rest and harshly not much use to the working population rightly or wrongly.

I'm retired and I'm 64. I most certainly am not very rich, I don't even own a home and never will, but I do have a little money to tide me over (where I live you get superannuation from 65). I didn't retire because I needed a rest, but because I think there is more to life to working. I started full time work three weeks after my 16th birthday, I've had enough. Lots of people here continue to work after they reach 65, so they obviously don't need a rest either. I'm retired because I don't want to work, and because I can, not because I'm "old" - simple as that.

And that's why middle age is 45-65.

You don't just lose the benefits that youth confers on your Forty fifth birthday. It's a gradual process for most of us and there are of course individual variations. Its medical terminology in any case, so perhaps ask your GP to run through it with you the next time you need to pay them a visit?

Life expectancy is 80, isnt it? So at 40 you're middleaged and at 65 ie 25 years past middle age then yes, that's elderly. If we had a lifespan of 150 years Id say differently. But, we don't. So its about reality. If youre lucky enough to have great health and fitness at 65 then you're an elderly person in good health that's all.

I can remember when I started work at 16 thinking the people that were in their late 40s were old, probably because they were older than my parents