If you are overweight now do you think your partner still finds you attractive?

I’ve been overweight and my DH didn’t say anything about it- still was complimentary and attracted to me
However I know now I’ve lost weight he is always saying how fit I looked so I do think he prefers it although says he doesn’t mind either wsy
I know that my DH finds slim women more attractive in general though- that’s just his type

I’m a 14 now and it’s overweight according to my bmi. I do look too big. for me 10 is healthy weight and 12 is pushing it.

What a silly, goady generalisation. Lots of people prefer a curvier figure, it’s just personal taste.

I said excess, unhealthy fat. Not curves.

This. I used to be a 10/12 and I was thin at 6ft. I've put a bit of weight on over the last 4 years and now wear a 14, mostly because I like to be comfortable really. If you compare photos I look like I've put a bit of weight on but I'm not overweight.

It depends on height. A 12-14 is not overweight if you are tall, especially if you are over 5 eight or so. A 12 on a woman of six foot is really slender and much smaller would be too skinny. I am five eight and while I personally prefer how I look at an 8-10, I am not overweight at all at a 12 or even a 14.

I’m nearly 50 and fat. My DH compliments me every day. I was fat at 18 when we met though so he knew what he was getting, I’ve got a reasonable face and I smile a lot which helps. I loathe my fat body and feel constantly at war with it (fighting a losing battle) but still get chatted up when I’m out. I dress to suit my body and I’m energetic and love going out. I think men are attracted to a friendly, pleasant face.

Loads of fat people are in happy sexual relationships so can’t be a deal breaker for everyone.

I'm 3 stone heavier than when we got married. DH definitely still fancies me but not as much. He found me more attractive when I was a bit thinner. He loves me just as much and would never say this out loud though. I can't complain- he's the same weight as when we married and if he'd gained 3 stone I would feel the same.

Oh gosh this is something I think about a lot. I’ve put on 2.5 stone since my cancer treatment and I’m sure my partner can’t possibly fancy me any more 🙁

I felt horrendous at a size 14 when illness piled the weight on. Dh said he still found me hot but it was irrelevant, I felt deeply unsexy. I do think lots of curvy women look amazing and it may be the confidence they have shows. I am far more confident at a 10 which is my 'well' weight. At the end of the day, dh fancied me when we met at a slim size and there are no guarantees people will fancy us as our body changes. One hopes they do though as we all age and change!

It very much can be on some frames.

My husband would find me attractive if I was larger, but I wouldn't. I think how you feel is far more important than anyone else's assessment.

@BlueMonday1977 I know, that poster was responding to a comment about whether certain body trends are genuinely positive.

We aren’t talking about health though, we are talking about whether you feel you are attractive personally and objectively.

I am not going to tell you the size, 14 would be slim for me....my husband is a handsome man , never failing to show he wants to be with me in the.....

This made me feel really sad. You should be more concerned about whether you find yourself attractive. You should lose weight/get in better shape for yourself and yourself alone xx

@pandarific I completely agree that curves are v. attractive to many, many people. My DD has an hourglass figure and she gets a lot of attention, far more than skinnier me did at that age!

From a medical point of view, being overweight is unhealthy though, isn’t it? A bmi of 25-plus increases health risks; 30-plus significantly increases them, doesn’t it?

My partner actually said he didn't fancy me when I was very skinny as I looked skeletal (I lost 2 stone a few years ago and at my lightest was 8st 2, BMI 18.5).
I think there would be quite a lot of leeway for weight gain before he wouldn't find me attractive. Mind you, it could be because he is overweight and is from an overweight family, so it's normal.
Size 12 to 14 is quite average these days. I wouldn't say it's particularly overweight at all.

I'm a size 20 at the moment and can't understand how my DP still finds me attractive. It's very obvious that he does though and he's adamant that my weight makes no difference to how attractive he finds me.

I've started shifting the weight now, so I'll be able to monitor whether this is indeed true 😄.

Cheers. But in what way would you fancying different people to me be triggering?

Apologies for triggering you. 😉

Not at all, you just appear to be confused about where you end, and other people start…

I am very happy finding fat, thin and in between people attractive, no nerve to touch there.

I am very overweight and dh is adamant that he still finds me very desirable and sexy. My low self esteem means I struggle to believe him, but he is absolutely sure.

Depends what you find attractive. Some people prefer all sorts of things, height, shape, all sorts of things. As one pp said some don't like beards!!

IME men really don't care about the same things women look at as flaws. They really don't. All the weight propaganda, fashion world do's and don'ts , plastic surgery etc is fuelled by mostly gay men who aren't interested in women's bodies other than as consumers of beauty, fashion, surgery etc etc. Straight men who are confident love women the way they are. My DH has known me 40 years and still feels the same about my looks, is extremely complimentary but it's me who is self critical.

What a silly, goady generalisation. Lots of people prefer a curvier figure, it’s just personal taste.