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Original poster

to ask how on earth you stop picking the skin around your nails?!

88 replies

ElleBelleLou · 26/02/2024 14:46

Hello mumsnet

Sorry to post in AIBU but I need the traffic - how on earth do I stop picking the skin around my nails red raw?!

I don't even know I'm doing it it's that much of a habit, I think it's an anxiety thing but my fingers are looking just awful. I'm trying hard to grow my nails and sort my hands out - my DP is proposing this year or next and I am so embarrassed at the state of my hands and getting worked up about showing off the ring with the state of my hands!

They're not at their worst at the minute, I'm trying to keep on top of hand cream, I've tried fidget rings, I stop myself or try keep my hands busy when I notice I am doing it but does anyone else have some tried or tested ways to stop picking at my bloody fingers!!

OP posts:
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circlesand · 26/02/2024 15:08

@ElleBelleLou That's great - do you talk about this in therapy specifically and have you said you want to focus on resolving it?

Original poster
ElleBelleLou · 26/02/2024 15:06

@theyoungishman that's exactly how I feel! I get in the bath and wince because my fingers are so sore, or sometimes they are literally throbbing when I'm trying to sleep at night. I wish I could just click my fingers and bloody stop!

OP posts:
hollyandivyknickers · 26/02/2024 15:05

I have the answer ! Buy the below fidget spinner from Amazon.

I have about 5 of these and don’t pick my fingers anymore. Will get a link

to ask how on earth you stop picking the skin around your nails?!
Original poster
ElleBelleLou · 26/02/2024 15:05

@UsernamePain I did try stick on nails for a while which was a great help but I want to get my natural nails strong so want to avoid any kind of fake nails again annoyingly!

@circlesand I'm actually already in therapy and medicated for my OCD and anxiety but haven't found a difference with the skin picking unfortunately!

@YYURYYUCICYYUR4ME That's a good idea - my phone background might get an upgrade this evening haha

OP posts:
theyoungishman · 26/02/2024 15:05

I'm exactly the same, and I even pulled bits of skin way too far and end up with bleeding fingers. I just can't help it every little rough bit or snag of skin needs to be picked.
My hands are disgusting 😌
The only times I've managed to get them looking good is if I have a manicure, then I seem to be a bit more conscious of making them look nice.
I also find any time I need to cut lemons or put my hands in hot water they really really sting because of the raw skin.
I've had this issue for nearly 30 years now, it's definitely triggered by anxiety for me

pinkfondu · 26/02/2024 15:03

The watching with interest

YYURYYUCICYYUR4ME · 26/02/2024 15:03

Take a picture and put it where it will remind you of the damage and how bad they can look. The screensaver on your phone should do it! Also google nail infections and that might do the trick too, so a form of aversion therapy.

circlesand · 26/02/2024 15:01

Go and speak to a good therapist about your underlying anxiety.

UsernamePain · 26/02/2024 15:01

I found that having false nails helped as I couldn’t physically grab the skin to pull. As soon as the nails came off I started again. It’s so sore and I hate myself for doing it but I just can’t seem to stop. As soon as I feel a rough or loose bit of skin is has to be pulled

SusannahD · 26/02/2024 15:00

I do the same, I do better at not picking if I keep up with handcream and cuticle oil, if it’s dry I will pick at it

Original poster
ElleBelleLou · 26/02/2024 14:59

@Thecaravan I'm doing my own head in with it! I see women with beautiful long nails and think they're so feminine, and I want that so bad for myself - but my nails are so weak and my fingers so sore it feels impossible to stop!

@chipsandpeas I did actually invest in a cuticle oil on my lunch break just today funnily enough! Also the Cerave advanced repair ointment which I'm liking so far (in my 2 hours of using it haha) - if nothing else I can't get a grip on the sides of my nails to pick which is hopefully a good start, I just need to remember to keep up with it

OP posts:
chipsandpeas · 26/02/2024 14:57

im the same but i use cuticle oil to keep them from drying out and cracking which is when i start to pick

Thecaravan · 26/02/2024 14:55

No, if you find a solution send it my way. My fingers are like yours. My thumb nails grow through with big horizontal grooves which I think is from damaging the nail bed with all the picking (although am prepared to be corrected on that. It was a diagnosis from Dr Google). Weirdly enough, my 4th fingers don't get picked. Not sure why..