to ask how on earth you stop picking the skin around your nails?!

@ElleBelleLou I do this if I don’t have long acrylic nails.

Acrylic nails aren’t sharp enough to actually be able to pick skin so the urge/habit dies off.

Pop a bit of Blistex on your fingers at bedtime- really helps them to heal quickly and without the dry flappy bits you might feel less compelled to keep picking

Oh, I meant to say, I've also come across the suggestion that this sort of thing is common alongside AD(H)D - something I've been considering getting assessed for too.

I sorted my nails out years ago as a student, by using clear nail polish on them regularly - I need to keep my nails short and uncoloured for work and hobbies. But cuticles etc are still dreadful.

I've realised the last few years since having both a smart phone and a touch screen laptop, I postpone putting cream on my hands as much as they need it because I don't want to grease up the screens ... not helping!! Definitely I need to actually use some of the creams I have all around, as often as I can.

Ironically I found some cuticle oil only the other day, that I got myself to try some years back - will try to remember to use it regularly for the next week and check back in here! I'll also have a look in my daughter's room to see if there are any fidget spinners I can borrow since she's away at university ...

@ImEvilStopLaughing those look amazing ! Thanks for that.

https://calmcollectiveco.com/products/spinning-moon-and-star-adjustable-anxiety-ring?_pos=1&_sid=4d6d7f19b&_ss=r
https://calmcollectiveco.com/products/4-bead-adjustable-anxiety-ring-316l

I found these 2 to be amazing. I needed that "flicking" motion, I found it mirrored what my fingers needed to do more closely than others. They also didn't tarnish or turn my fingers green, which is what others had done.

I've done this ever since I can remember and I'm mid thirties now. I don't think I'll ever be able to stop.

Nail and skin biter for 55 years.. consciously perhaps longer as probably started as a baby... 7 years ago I went to the nail salon with my then teen girls and have gel nails... does it wreck my nails underneath ? I don't know and don't care whatever was there before was HIDEOUS... I NOW LOVE my nails.

Thanks for that. The OP did say I think it's an anxiety thing

Just joining in to say I do this too. I also pick the nails themselves.

Get a manicure. They trim off what they can. Then rub cuticle oil onto your nails three times a day.

I always pick at my skin around my nails. But I only pick upwards. I rarely make them bleed. Any really large bits I bite off. You have to force yourself to be more mindful. Its tricky

I have done exactly this, instead of picking, applying cream. Switch one habit with a better one. It does work. Right now I only have a sore bit on a thumb and one little finger which is really good for me. I suspect it is a genetic predisposition and I have OCD traits, but I also think environmental stress plays a part too. I certainly have cycles where it is better or worse - same with picking skin on soles of feet - ugh. Have, I think broken that now but did have it for a few years. Again moisturising and eliminating any rough patches really did help.

I'll add in a nail file, if I find dry / hard skin (and I catch myself before I've picked at it) then using a nail file to gently file the dry skin so there are no rough edges to pick at followed by an intensive moisturiser does help

(Am currently trying to heal mine up again after I picked at them last week so the file and the moisturiser has been out several times today)

I find I have to consciously do something else with my hands if I start picking

I'm the same, but I'm a chewer, not a picker! When I manage to remember (🙄) and I feel some hard dry skin at the sides, I get an emery board and gently file the rough bits down. Then I put some hand cream on. Works a treat for me, if I to remember to do it before I start chewing! Which is sometimes hard, as I've done it for years! Tried everything else, including nail polish, but it doesn't work for me. I've had some bloody sore fingers in my days, this seems to be the only thing that works for me! Good luck! 💐

Don't just do hand cream generally, keep it near where you tend to pick so if you get the urge to pick you can sit and rub some cream into that area instead. You have to replace the action or it won't go away.

It is correlated not with abuse and bullying but with skin sensitivity that also manifests with intolerance to stitches, tags, stockings, and certain materials like wool on the skin.

Get a pair of cuticle nippers to begin with and you can safely tidy up all the little bits that catch and make you pick..once they are gone then keep the area moisture really well. You need to get rid of these first, then when the skin is smooth it makes it harder to pick.

Like you, most people used to think that excessive skin picking was due to abuse, anxiety, etc and were perplexed by those of us who had idyllic childhoods and are confident adults with no anxiety. Now we know better.

It's a way of stimming, so have you tried exploring what sensory input you get and how to replace it? Things like a hairband on your wrist to ping , squeezing your fingertips, making sure you have no loose bits of skin etc might help. I think it is harder than nail biting to resolve as at least with biting you can put the revolting taste varnish on.

Google is your friend. I like scholar.google.com for scientific studies.

NHS says the following:

"Causes of skin picking disorder: Skin picking disorder is related to obsessive compulsive disorder, where the person cannot stop themselves carrying out a particular action."

@CoteDAzur - do you have a link for that please?

That theory is by now replaced by the understanding that dermatillomania is a neurological condition with genetic predisposition, a kind of OCD.

As others have noted, this is a subconscious issue, not a conscious one. At some point in the past, probably childhood, the mind devised a strategy of picking at the skin - or other similar 'habits' such as hair pulling - to avoid or to deal with something that was out of your control. Maybe it was parents arguing or being bullied at school - whatever the root cause was is no longer an issue but the habit remains because it was the only thing that you could control at that time. That's why hypnosis is effective here because it simply allows direct communication with the subconscious to let it know it can stop now.

When I got engaged and my skin picking really bothered me, I focused on not picking the hand my ring was on. It was easier than trying to stop altogether and as I was really motivated I managed it! I’ve not managed to stop completely but I don’t do it as badly now I’m older and I just accept that it’s a thing I do.