To say that the next generation is primarily screwed in terms of resilience

This is about children though

We dont normally expect children to have the maturity to control their behaviour all the time

A report has just been published by the Resolution Foundation that says more 20 somethings are on long term sickness leave from work, or claiming out of work disability benefits, than 40 somethings, reversing a longstanding trend. Much of this is due to mental health issues.

I think it's a big problem. I work in a university and I'd say at least half my tutees declare an anxiety condition. It's commonplace to get extension after extension on assignments. I don't see how that's preparing them for life post uni but unis are understandably worried about students committing suicide. Eg see the recent court case against Bristol Uni (I don't work there but it's national news).

Writing an entire generation off as snowflakes without looking at the extreme pressures they’re under and the lack of resources or support they’re getting isn’t going to help either.

Also The Coddling Of The American Mind is all about this, and applicable here (UK) too.

Sorry I didn't add the link https://open.spotify.com/episode/5dyeoq59cAIlP1FpOcEW2F?si=T7XaB53VQYWfarCz_WAggg

Yes, and many of those posters are bringing up children of their own. It's frightening.

It is not just the younger generation how many examples on here daily

Oh people can't do that or make that decision - because it will then become about me

I am feeling judged because someone else has put something on social media so I have come up with a backstory

If someone says something in passing there is a way to turn it about themselves

I am also wondering if narcissism is increasing?

I've already said this, but I will repeat it. Nobody is force fed the news and has photos of atrocities shoved down their throats every day. If people are so weak that they are incapable of limiting the amount of this stuff in their daily lives then I seriously fear for the world. It's yet another symptom of this decay - people thinking that they have no choices and it's all being "shoved down their throats". I watch the news once or twice a day, read the local newspaper and that's about it. You are in control of what you see/hear, the fact that you choose not to exert that control is your fault, no-one else's.

I'm a boomer, as are all my friends many of my work colleagues, and cousins. We are all fine, no-one is suffering from any trauma, and no-one has turned to alcoholism. We all had great childhoods, and managed to navigate our schooldays unscathed. A couple lost their mothers when they were children, one has lost a child.

And yet we are supposed to admire young people who can't cope with the most trivial upset

There is a lot of rubbish on this thread.

I do see the lack of resilience in teens and young 20’s but agree it’s more general across age groups too.
Yes Covid restrictions made a huge difference, especially to those in small spaces without physical access to friends but the trend was already there.
My guess is a combination of too much screen time, lack of physical exercise, and especially team focussed, lack of boundaries and parental guidance on coping skills Etc but too much steering of play dates, lack of sleep, lack of nutritious food, too many pollutants, especially those affecting hormones. Add in that the news is very worrying from wars to cost of living crisis to knife crime and climate change and to top everything off exam syllabus are definitely harder, grades need to be ever higher to get into Uni and then you’re left with a huge debt and a job shortage.
I believe it’s an incredibly hard time to be a youngster.

I'm not singling you out particularly, but I keep reading this, and it's just nonsense. Yes, I agree all generations complain about the ones coming behind them, but this is something different. Never before have there been large numbers of young people who simply cannot seem to cope with normal life, who expect others to change things to suit them because they can't be expected to do something they don't like, or have never done before, and couldn't possibly give it a go (like all the previous generations had to) because of their MH.

Read the posts from people in education, who have been doing the job for years and have never encountered children like this before. Something is seriously wrong and laughing it off with this old chestnut isn't going to help.

Really, all of them?? Don't be absurd.

Well my generation were told that computers would take all our jobs. Somehow we managed to cope.

I think that medicalisation of emotions is playing a part in this. People aren't feeling anxious or depressed anymore, they "have anxiety" or "have depression". It is a minor change, but one which takes a temporary feeling and makes it a more permanent fixture. People are increasingly being told if you feel anxious, you must have a medical problem, and you are at liberty to avoid anything triggering because you must protect your mental health. In reality, feeling anxious about new or unknown things is a completely normal human reaction that the entire population experiences. Mental health isn't blocking out negative emotions - being mentally healthy involves experiencing, navigating and managing all emotions, positive and negative. If we aren't encouraged to do this, how can we build up our resilience to negative situations?

This sounds like the environment is completely unsuitable for these kids.

Have you seen what 5 year olds are expected to do in the curriculum? It’s totally inappropriate, highly pressured and I think I’d kick off that way if I was 5 and being treated like a statistic on a graph/being asked to do all the stupid academic shit they have to do to jump through hoops for the school.

The curriculum/education system is totally out of touch and outdated for today’s world.

@Garlickit "I have long held that, for the good of everyone in society, everybody should do at least one course of proper therapy; it should be as expected as learning to swim or drive. Whether you agree or not, though, we're clearly a long way from that.

While there is so much more demand for mental health support than resources to provide it, surely it makes sense to direct those resources to the "actually disordered", and treat the "normally uncomfortable" as children in need of guidance on coping with an imperfect life."

In the UK the bigger problem is poverty and many children don't have enough food or warm, clean, safe accommodation. The idea of therapy for all is pie in the sky in the context.

As the number of people seeking mental health treatment have increased, so the support to those with serious mental health problems has decreased. Resources have just been spread very thinly.

There seem to be two discussions going on here about mental health. I'm not sure if posters really are misunderstanding one another or it's just a symptom of individual preoccupations.

On the one hand, we have what could be called "actual disorders", such as ASDs. I imagine we'd all agree that improved awareness, diagnostics and treatment strategies are a desirable development. We'd all agree, I think, there should be provision here.

Then we have a pathologisation of developmentally normal emotions such as fear, anxiety, doubt, confusion, anger and downright general stroppiness. These are not "actual disorders" but it wouldn't surprise me to learn they can be turned into mental health problems by treating them as such. We do children no favours by acting as though only good feelings are worth having, nor by allowing them to believe there is such a thing as perfection in life.

I have long held that, for the good of everyone in society, everybody should do at least one course of proper therapy; it should be as expected as learning to swim or drive. Whether you agree or not, though, we're clearly a long way from that.

While there is so much more demand for mental health support than resources to provide it, surely it makes sense to direct those resources to the "actually disordered", and treat the "normally uncomfortable" as children in need of guidance on coping with an imperfect life.

I completely agree. I have two teens who are nowhere near as resilient as I'd like and go to pieces at small things like being told off by a teacher, any slightly sad news item (though they are fine with climate change apparently, judging by their inability to turn off lights, wear anything other than fast fashion especially Nike, go to McDonald's etc!) or not being able to find something, for example. Most of their friends have suffered with mental health issues which are often manifested through eating disorders, self harm, anxiety... Obv we don't know what goes on behind closed doors but we 'know' most of their parents and they are all, as far as we know, from stable living homes with lots of opportunities etc. Conversely, I work with teens in the criminal justice system abd it blows my.mind what many have survived, with the impact of their traumas manifesting in other ways - gravitation to gangs, drugs, violence etc. I've never had someone with an eating disorder on my caseload though, and rarely see self harm other than through unhealthy or reckless behaviours... It's very interesting but I definitely worry for our young. Perhaps it's the impact of COVID, other societal issues, modern parenting, who knows but whatever the issues are they're going to need all the resilience they can get in coming years!

Perhaps there are not enough opportunities for the young to debate the pros and cons of society?

You must be joking. Everyone has an unprecedented array of platforms now, both online and for real. For some reason, few of the younger people know how to debate or even think of it as a good thing. "Cancelling" everyone who doesn't agree with you in every detail, shouting others down while refusing to listen, or retreating while grumbling "Educate yourself!" does absolutely nothing to move diversity forward, improve knowledge & understanding, or foster co-operation.

I'm not exaggerating. The most powerful social movement of these times has succeeded in near-total institutional & societal capture over an incredibly short space of time, running the slogan "NO DEBATE".

You can thank the overly academic Victorian-style curriculum for that.

In no way does school today prepare students for the real world. Its main aim is to get them to regurgitate arbitrary knowledge by passing tests which is for the schools league tables alone.

Perhaps if we asked them what they want, instead of telling them what they should do, they would be more communicative.

Do the young realise that every bad situation can be redeemed?

My children are grown. There was one rule which brought punishment when broken: telling the truth. Everything else was a mistake. If they lied about something, it was the worse thing they could do and carried consequences.

It is not difficult to 'tell' from their faces if they were telling the truth, and nine times out of ten, they confessed later.

Are children taught how to redeem something good out of mistakes?

Lol sounds like the op struck a nerve!

I definitely don’t cringe at my grandparents as I’m mentally mature enough to understand they didn’t know better and quite frankly, they fought in a war to ensure we all live as freely as we do now.

Don't forget, for all the negatives you’re citing about previous generations, it’s due to them that medicine, technology and human behaviour etc have advanced enough to give way more opportunities and lifestyles than have previously been enjoyed. Did everyone get it right… nope… but every generation makes it mistakes.

As for the phrases used in the past and how people behaved…. I’d take the 90’s any day over now. It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows but there’s a lot to be said for living more simply and not wetting yourself because someone called you a dolly.

Perhaps the conflicts around the world, civil unrest, racism, intolerance, knife crime, have made teenagers fearful of a world they are afraid to join?

When I see how sensitive people in high places are, how easily they are offended, and how the most minor comment can start violence, and how difficult relationships can be, and if there are not enough examples being set by adults in their environment, it must be very difficult for young people to find a niche in life that they can relate to. I think it depends on their immediate environment.

Perhaps there are not enough opportunities for the young to debate the pros and cons of society?

There is too much anger and resentment around, and I suppose it really boils down to their surroundings how young people cope.