Which is preferable - weekday wedding or child free wedding?

Depends on the location. London (/Brum/Manchester etc) wedding on a Thursday with mostly London (etc) guests could still be a good time as long as most people don't have school age children. If most people are three hours away from home then that's more of a problem.

As a guest I prefer a child free wedding.

(I have kids but prefer to leave them with GPs and enjoy adult time with DH)

Have you looked dates in the winter? We saved thousands by getting married in November.

+1 for finding a venue you can afford rather than getting guests to cover the decision.

Pretty much!

I think the one you would prefer is the preferable one. As long as you know some people won't be able to come for whatever reason but they know they were invited - I think it is fine . You can't please all of the people all of the time.

Congratulations @overgrowngrass - I do think a wedding is something where you can have your choice and I think whichever way you choose a good friend would not blame you if the alternative was spending a huge amount of money

Just my opinion

For us it wasn’t so much the cost (although that would have been considerable as it was a plated sit-down dinner) as the capacity. Both the church and the reception venue had absolutely rigid caps on numbers for fire safety reasons, and it was already a nightmare trying to work out who didn’t make the cut, with a few decisions I still regret/feel guilt about. Children would have taken up half the available slots, for a formal ceremony and evening party that really wasn’t envisaged with them in mind. To be honest we never really considered inviting them, and most weddings I’ve been to since we had our own kids have been similar. Much I’ve enjoyed the odd more relaxed one that we’ve brought them along to, they haven’t been the norm in my experience. And I’ve never been invited to a weekday wedding but almost certainly wouldn’t be able to go…

Childfree. I’m not childfree, but every wedding I have been to with children has been a nightmare!! I love childfree weddings, can properly catch up with my friends and chat without having one ear/eye out for the children. If my children were invited to a wedding I wouldn’t bring them unless I had to. They’re not much fun for the child unless the children are older and be left to themselves.

Wow at not having kids saving 2k.. that's a huge saving. Even though they don't drink or eat much?! How many kids??

The OP has said only 1 of their guests is a weekend worker so in this case it makes more sense to inconvenience 1 person instead of dozens.

As you have said most of your friends/family work Mon-Fri then I would definitely go for a weekend wedding.

I would begrudge taking 1 or 2 days annual leave for a wedding and I think a lot of people would feel the same.

Does it have to be child-free for the whole thing? When I got married we had no children at ceremony due to space limits but said people could bring kids to evening. Ceremony and evening were different location so some people popped home and grabbed kids from grandparents etc on way to evening do.

For our evening only guests we told them to bring kids if they wanted. Some did. Some didn't.

Weekday wedding, so much cheaper. I went to a Friday wedding, it was small but felt very emotional and fun. There were fewer bored-looking people.
The superiority of lots of Mon-Fri workers is incredible. Happy to use the services of people who work weekends but think they should have to use half their AL for family events so weekday workers don't have to use 1 day. It's very classist.

I think childfree at weekends is best. When my children were little we would bring Granny along to look after them at a nearby hotel or holiday house etc. We lived a long way from Grandparents but it made it an adventure and memorable event having Granny or Grandma for a weekend away.
We do have an adult DC with LD and often have to go to events on our own. One goes one takes DC on an adventure nearby. Grandparents all dead now.
I love it when she is included but had a fantastic time at a friend's DD wedding on my own.
Whatever you do somebody is bound to moan. It seems to be human nature.
Therefore, do what you want and I wish you a long and happy marriage.

Childfree is pretty standard because most venues have limited capacities and people get it. I’d go for that.

if it doesn’t work for your guests they don’t have to come, but im sure you understand that!

Do what’s best for you not other people.

Yup. I straight don't have the days, end of story. Every one is accounted for. Weekday wedding would get an immediate "regret can't, best wishes".

We won't be able to attend on a child free wedding as we can't orgonise child care (no family or friends leave near by).

We also couldn't do week days becouse of our jobs.

To be honest, we had a lockdown wedding with only 8 people in the garden- best day of my life and wouldn't change a thing. Ended up saving tens of thousands which went towards our honeymoon and house. Best decisions ever made.

"I know if someone I loved and cared about invited me to share their big day I wouldn’t think twice about having to book the day off."

Until you realise you've booked holidays already for your leave. Not everyone just has leave sitting around in case someone has a weekday wedding.

I disagree. The wedding day is about the bride and the groom. I know if someone I loved and cared about invited me to share their big day I wouldn’t think twice about having to book the day off.

Not a weekday.

Just declined a week day wedding. Not prepared to use 2 days AL each plus DD miss two days of school

Yep, it's a gamble. Also some of the declines may be people who surprise you and you'd think would be definites, it's all such a guessing game.

How many kids are you inviting? And how much extra space do they need!

Don't make plans assuming you know how many people will come (either way!). We very nearly invited more people than our venue could hold because we only set a wedding date five months beforehand so lots of people and online info said we'd have a big decline rate. Thank goodness we didn't as we got one person out of 80 decline!

Weekday weddings can be good, but there's no denying you're introducing an element of risk when most of your guests are Mon to Fri workers. The ones I've been to that were great were all on either Thursday or Friday, which I suspect made a big difference.

We are having a weekday wedding albeit a Friday, nothing to do with costs particularly just it was what suits us best.

You won't please everyone regardless of what or when you do it.

But your wedding day is the one day you get to be as selfish as you want and do things exactly as you please. Yes that may mean some people can't or won't come but ultimately you aren't getting married for them.