Upset that husband eats my leftovers

Just say "I'm not finished yet I'm just dealing with .... : whatever" . If he still eats your stuff after staing you haven't finished, maybe give him a bigger portion to begin with.

Just tell him, “I’m not finished so keep your fork/grubby mitts off my food”.
Granted you shouldn’t have to but it’s clear you need to

Do you not tell him you still want the food when you leave for a few minutes? Or simply eat it all at once instead of keep leaving it?

You are not being unreasonable. He is a CF. Your husband needs to ask EVERY TIME before he finishes the food on your plate or risk a fork through the back of his hand. Nothing gets wasted in our house (I have 2 teenage boys) but no-one takes food without asking.

That clears things up a bit. He needs counselling to sort this out. He’s just re-enacting a behaviour that was familiar to him during the hard times. This would be understandable if he was a child. As an adult, he is expected to actively stop behaving like this. It’s just inconsiderate and selfish.

Good God! I'd be wiring the plate up to the mains with a switch that I could activate remotely. I'd also sneak in a nanny cam so that I could film the result and snigger repeatedly.

I think I may have been a Vengeance Demon in a past life.

Op and those women who have husbands who behave similarly….do you actually still fancy these men?! Cos I really think it would give me the ick!

Mine does this with the grandkids food. Regularly says “ you’re not going to eat that, are you”? Even when they’ve just had a plate put in front of them. His dad does exactly the same. Pigs, it’s disgusting.

This.

Ridiculous though that he didn't learn from his mistake the first time and you have to work around his behaviour. Is he disrespectful in other ways?

Just getting vibes of my arsey ex in terms of unreasonableness.

Do it to him.

Go to a pottery painting place and make yourself a plate that a says 'Don't you fucking dare' around the edge for you to serve your dinners on.

Seriously though I'd be asking him if he's had a fall recently he's not told you about because a brain injury is the only scenario I can imagine that explains why he's not getting this.

My dad used to do this, but then Mum started licking everything, slurping the gravy all sorts which did put my dad off touching it 😅

Fake cough or sneeze on it before u leave next time OP and see if he still finishes it

@Triste1992 His Cuban childhood may well have had a psychological effect on how he sees food and this 'grab it while you can' mentality may spring from that. It may not, of course, and he's just using it as an excuse to behave atrociously.

If it's the former, tell him to get some help. If its the latter, tell him your marriage is at risk. Whatever his problem is, it isn't hunger. You can't go on like this, especially when children are seeing / experiencing it.

YANBU, this would send me into a rage.

You get up to loo after your child and he eats your dinner? He sounds awful and what reason does he have for going in a huff with you?

You have already told him several times that just because you left your plate with food, that doesn't mean you were done. You shouldn't have to tell him every single time.
If he is still hungry, may be time to make a little extra or have him go buy some snacks or extra food for when he gets hungry.

"It happens frequently and its always the same excuse. I dont yell at him, just complain. But now, he gets upset."
Upset? As in, upset that you complain, because you should accept him eating your dinner and say nothing? Because I'm doubting he's upset that he's 'forgotten' not to eat your share as well as his own.

I suspect he is 'upset' rather than upset. As in, he may express that he is upset, but it's just a tactic he's deploying to see if it will shut you up. Don't fall for it.

"Yes, my DH is Cuban and went through a few years of hunger, so he does have some disfunctional eating habits. Its sad."
Honestly? He's an adult now, and should be capable of self-control. Regardless of his past food issues (and I accept they could be emotionally powerful for him) he's not in Cuba now and there is not an insurmountable problem getting enough food into the house. Rationally, he must know that. He needs to exercise self-control and BE a fucking adult!

You've told him that taking your food when you haven't finished eating is upsetting you. He is choosing to pretend he thought you didn't want it - he damned well knows you did! Maybe getting a cover to put over your plate would reinforce the message, but I wouldn't count on it.

What would he do if, instead of you "step[ping] away from the table (to help our child for example)" you stayed at the table and asked him to"help our child for example" instead, because you don't want to "come back to an empty plate"? What would he do?

Also - just keep in mind that he is modelling this behaviour to your child. So the sooner he stops doing this, the better.

I think that's terrible behaviour OP 😦
Your husband is a greedy pig.

Treat him like the child he's being and tell him when you leave the table that you will be back to finish your meal. Or let him fix his own meals. I would not be happy if someone did this to me, but if they continued to do this, I would feel bullied and would reconsider the relationship.

My ex used to always eat the last bit of everything. Take the last coffee, the last milk, the last whatever. He’d even eat foods I had purposely saved for the children’s packed lunch. And then look at me blankly when I got pissed off.

Your husband is on another level of selfish and greedy.

Eating your leftovers? Fine
Eating your dinner when you aren't looking? Wtf

You could cook him much bigger portions when it is your turn to cook, and any excess frozen afterwards.

But does he complain he’s still hungry after finishing his meal if there are no “leftovers” of the OP’s to eat? She can’t be called away from the table every night - so some nights he must just eat his own.

If he’s not complaining of hunger any other time, he’s not eating the OP’s food out of hunger either. He’s doing it because it’s there.

as you step away - move your plate away from him - whilst saying something along the lines - "i haven't finished with this, but as you cant seem to keep your fat fingers off my unfinished food, i better move it out of your reach so its here when i come back"

Then if he eats it - you know its not a misunderstanding - its actually him trampling all over your boundaries...

This. It's not left overs if you are still going to eat it. Why doesn't he just dish himself up a larger plateful instead of stealing your meal? I'd be furious with him.