Annoyed by random man incidents

@VampireWeekday that is true. But I gave up dating a long time ago because of all the rude, entitled men I can't be bothered to sift through any more.

But we still need to exist in a world dominated by men. You don't have to date them to experience this regular aggression from strangers.

I just make sure I take as long as I possibly fucking can to take my stuff off the scales if they do this to me. I'll let my 4yr old 'help' too which makes it take even longer.

Why all the men being cunts?

All you women saying you play Patriarchy Chicken, you're wrong, a man says you're wrong, despite describing why he walks into you not why you have decided to stop stepping aside for men so very clearly something completely different.

and this is how we do it, we face them down, bit by bit
(even so, please dont put yourself at risk!)

I just stop and won't move.
I'm five foot nothing but I refuse to be treated so badly.

Some huge burly bloke tried it last week. Walking on a narrow footpath (you can pass people if you keep to the side) and he was striding along the middle. I just stopped walking when it became clear he wasn't moving over. He looked most affronted.

That's so weird. I'm surprised they went that way. I've only ever had the opposite. I had a man come up to me in a pub saying he didn't think I could control my dog properly. I looked perplexed as my dog was sat next to me perfectly and said he's well trained. It's not a concern for you. He said yeah but if something happened, you wouldn't be able to control him. He's well trained and I have had to control defend him from all the offlead dogs many a time. He is an American Akita at 50 plus kg. I was 80kg at the time, not exactly small. I wish I could make him growl on command.

What lane were you in?

I was once driving along a bog standard road at thirty mph when a man suddenly pulled out from a parking space on the side of the road right in front of me and I beeped him so he didn't hit me. Clearly enraged (not quite sure at what when he had almost driven into me) he wound his window down and started mouthing off at me when we ended up alongside each other at the next red light. What he hadn't anticipated was the fact that I was on my way home from the hospital after a tough day and having been the recipient of some bad news. I feel I should say I'd normally not respond in any way but I absolutely lost my shit at him and screamed back that it was his fault and basically went nuts myself. Totally out of character for me but my god was it not what he was expecting. His face fell and he quickly shut up, wound his window up and looked straight ahead until the lights changed. I was shaking afterwards, couldn't believe what I had said and how I had behaved but I hope it made him think twice the next time he tried to bully a lone woman driving at night. Twat

What I can't understand is how do they simultaneously love themselves and believe they're the centre of the universe and have such fragile egos to the point where they're assaulting random women whilst out and about That's some messed up attitude. They need to get a grip.

He was being rude and entitled and wouldn't have dared ask a man to do the same.

I was driving on an almost empty stretch of motorway once, and a man drove up behind me at speed, then cut me up by overtaking me very closely and pulling in very sharply in front. For absolutely zero reason, and the other two lanes were completely free so no need for any overtaking in the first place. He actually changed lanes initially in order to move behind me to carry out his close-shave overtake manoeuvre. We were the only road users at the time. He just wanted to intimidate me with his car.

A few years ago I stopped moving out of the way of men when walking along a pavement/corridor/etc.

Now, I am not that tall, around 5'7, but stocky and strong. It is incredibly satisfying when pig-headed men walk directly into me and all but bounce off of me.

Recently a man about a foot shorter than me was incredibly rude at the gym, for no real reason other than a miscommunication about sharing equipment. It could have been solved very easily and we were very reasonable to each other at first. Anyway he shat himself and backed down when I stood up to defend myself. Ended up in an argument and every time I see him he acts all embarrassed and weird.

Big tall man might not have been looking low enough to spot your child. It happens. Get over it.

Oh do stop. If you are out in public, you have a duty to pay attention to what is happening around you. Because it is not your world which we all happen to live in - other people have rights too.

I have tried this but the town where I live has got quite dangerous and I genuinely fear I'd get stabbed if I did it to the wrong person

Big tall man might not have been looking low enough to spot your child. It happens. Get over it. The other man.. not sure what his deal is he sounds either nom neuro typical and that's his routine or yeah a nob.

In my time I have had three large long haired German Shepherds. I cannot count the number of times that random men have approached me to tell me that my dog is particularly small for the breed or very narrow in the chest or not likely to grow much. My dogs were fucking huge, random men, absolutely fucking huge.

About 25 years ago and driving home from work on the motorway. My car was old and looked it. A man in a red BMW started tailgating me, though there was no space to pull in, but I did pull in when it was possible just to get rid of him. A mile down the road I was delighted to see he'd been pulled over by the police.

If I may disagree, it’s not patriarchy chicken, it’s attention dominance (not a recognised medical term)

I’m a bloke (which is subtlety different to vanilla male) and if I’m walking on my own, I’m watching where I’m going (usually because I walk fast) So I spend my time avoiding oncoming people and bouncing around like a pinball.

But if I’m walking with my wife and i’m looking at her, then I’m relying on peripheral vision to avoid tripping over people a foot shorter than me. Now, people will shift out of our way. And before I’m accused of mansplaining, this was my wife’s observation which I’m just repeating

i don’t think attention dominance is at all a conscious decision, and I’m sure there’s an interesting paper to be written

A guy tried to cut me up going into a small roundabout. I did not give way. Overtook me as soon as he could, drove ahead of me to where the dual carriageway narrowed to a small country lane, parked his car and when I came up behind him, got out and walked over to my window. I told him to get back in his car - but wish I had taken pictures of him.

The guy in London who was not only annoyed that I did not give way for him, but left it so late to swerve, he tripped over my wheel along case. He was even more unimpressed when I told him to stop when he was about to give me a mouthful, and told him he needed to watch what he was doing.

Whenever I’m out with my wife we ALWAYS get a random man come over to us with the worst chat ever- where we are going? how was your meal? Why are you out? Have you had a nice girls day? Why did you choose here? bla bla bla. They always become extremely uncomfortable and slope off when we say we are married. Two women can’t possibly be out together without a man intervening to “improve” their night. I’d never dream of going over to two men enjoying a nice night and try to join them. Tedious.

How to play Patriarchy Chicken: why I refuse to move out of the way for men (newstatesman.com)

And inspired an american version
How I Am Teaching My Small Daughters To Play Patriarchy Chicken | HuffPost HuffPost Personal

I really really like this. Smart thinking 😊

I cant remember the writer but remember reading a piece about a woman who works in London who said a few times a week she 'plays patriarchy chicken'. She does not give way to men coming towards her. She said sometimes they just grind to a halt because they cannot quite believe you have not moved.