To have yelled and dragged child out

It's a bloody difficult age, we just muddle through.

My child was a horror for running off. Worst times were using a public toilet and me needing to wee and he kept unlocking the door and bolting. Every single time. I never worked out a strategy for that.

I’m in the midst of this too. I try and take them to interesting places like you and I just wanted to say, you did a great job. Kept little one safe. We all shout sometimes and you did it because he wasn’t safe. Keep going mama! You’re doing amazing things for your kids.

as a mum of a (nearly) 3 year old and a 1 year old, this sounds like most of my attempts at going out with them on my own. dont worry op, its normal 😅

Keep up the good work. A bit less of this namby pamby style parenting.

I remember a similar moment when DS2 was just 3, DS1 (aged 4) ran one way DS2 the other while I was BFing the baby. DS2 managed to run into a fecking lift and I just got my foot in the door before it went off. He was definitely shouted at!

Sounds very reasonable.

That's usually no. 2's job

Funnily enough I was in the London Docklands Museum recently and there was a mother with a baby and an about two year old - think there was a father too. I have no idea why people take children as young as this to museums of this kind. The young child ended up just screaming and then the mother was even worse shouting at the child. It's a PITA for people who actually want to listen to reels etc.

You're fine OP

I'd have been ragin'

I've read your updates but not previous comments - next time brief before you go in "you need to listen to mummy or we'll have to hold hands/leave" and have one year old in the carrier. His name alone doesn't give him information on what you want - "NAME stand still" or "NAME sit down" might have been more effective. There's exactly two years between mine - I feel your pain.

Sounds fine to me. It wasn't a situation where you had time to find your calmest self and have a patient chat with him.

Get some toddler reigns for your toddler and then he can't run away or wriggle out of your hand

Really!? 🤣 it’s going to get worse, don’t be ridiculous they need telling off and learn that some things are not ok. Get over it

You did what you had to do

You didn’t do anything wrong.

Shouting isn’t ideal because it makes you feel bad but it’s not going to harm your child.

Reins were a life changer for me at that age.
It literally just stops them running off and you can just clip them to your belt or something so you don’t feel like you’re holding a lead.

I’d also have a baby carrier or something for the youngest, in case it ever happens again.

You have a 1yo and a 3yo.
I do not envy you and I’m surprised that this isn’t a daily occurrence for you.

Do not feel bad because it’s not easy and it sounds like you’re doing a great job.

There’s probably proper parenting things you could have done but in that situation I just hope you get to put the feet up tonight. Two that young is sooo difficult!!! X

This is the perfect answer. It's not helpful for people to say they're a brat.

Well done.
But do get some reins.

Be kind to yourself. It was just a stressful situation. When your toddler tuns off your life flashes before your eyes and you end up having a kneeler reaction. Don't worry x

We've all been there op, don't beat yourself up.

Don't beat yourself up about it.

I think you did the right thing.

Kids sometimes need to know how their behaviour has affected you. You could talk to a 3yo until you're blue in the face about running off and danger, etc, but they're more likely to pay attention to the short, sharp correction and being hauled away from their course.

Many, many women have "been there". Don't feel embarrassed.

You did what you had to do. Nothing wrong with that.

Maybe invest in a couple of reins/harness (for when the little one starts walking too) for your next outing.

You were lucky he ran from you somewhere inside and not in the middle of traffic so now you know he might do a runner again in future so best to be prepared.

Might also be worth explaining road safety/stranger danger to him too. It might help him understand why he shouldnt go out of sight.

I call it the terrible 3s

Every single one of mine was the same, it's like they hit 3 yrs and decide that legging it off is the thing to do, no concept of danger at all.

Sometimes you have to shout, otherwise they don't hear you as they're focused on getting away and mid tantrum!

If you use a softy spoken voice that's not going to get their attention, a quick shout stops them in their tracks.

It's not like you're running about daily screaming your head off so now and then is fine if it keeps them safe .

You had a nearly 1 year old in your arms, that's a heavy weight, you couldn't carry 2 children, you couldn't leave one outside while you ran back in, you couldn't bring the pram in, nothing else you could have done.

I remember one of mine shooting across a car park into oncoming cars, I let a roar, more in fright and to stop them immediately, one of my brothers was with me, he didn't speak to me for 8 months because it was according to him child abuse 🙄 I do enjoy watching him manage his 4 kids now while mine are grown, there's many shouts and raised voices.

You’re over thinking your own parenting. You just put yourself in a stressful situation. Lesson learned. Next time you’ll be more prepared.

1 + 3 is awful. It gets better. Have a big glass of something nice tonight. Tomorrow is another day