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Original poster

Stop saying 'myself and...'

187 replies

Ridiculous24 · 16/02/2024 04:46

I'm sorry, I'm grumpy.
It's everywhere.
The top level at work are now using it. They have English degrees.

OP posts:
piscofrisco · 17/02/2024 08:46

I didn't take an offered job once because the person that would have been my manager kept saying, 'would that suit yourself?', 'would that work for yourself?'when describing the terms and conditions. The T and C were fine. The managers use of 'yourself' would have made me grind my teeth down to stumps within a month.

banivani · 17/02/2024 08:39

As previous Irish posters have pointed out it's perfectly correct in Hiberno-Irish grammar to use the reflexive pronoun differently. In that Hancock tweet someone screenshot earlier it seems to my ear that he's using myself correctly by Irish standards. A theory could be that Irish usage is influencing English usage? But on all threads on this topic people do give examples that seem ungrammatical in a Hiberno-Irish sense. In which case Irish usage could be influencing English usage but the grammatical rules aren't translating, maybe?

Using himself/herself to mark "a person of importance" is Irish too, as a PP wrote.

Who knows, perhaps the English can go back to using the correct "amn't" instead of "aren't" if enough time passes ;)

I agree completely on estate agent language being ludicrous though. It might be universal. Here in Sweden I once saw an ad for a house with "wonderful attributes", which seemed to be a surrounding fence.

Springsombrero · 17/02/2024 07:49

TotHappy · 16/02/2024 23:13

Do we have kids at the same school? The head put this in a newsletter last week! And it was conveying unwelcome news so just added insult to injury.

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Ha, no. When I was 20 I had a summer job as an audio typist - transcribing dictated letters for a small group of chartered surveyors. Every single letter ended with this phrase. I was super shy back then and don’t think I ever spoke to any of the surveyors, but I quietly changed this every time. They never commented. 😂

PedantScorner · 17/02/2024 07:19

@XenoBitch , because they might find it grating or think you are uneducated.

LittleMG · 17/02/2024 07:13

I could have started this thread OP YA DEFINITELY NBU!!!! Why do people do it? It sounds so bloody stupid!

Lifestooshort71 · 17/02/2024 06:59

cardibach · 16/02/2024 22:39

My husband and I are nipping down the chippy then out for a pint of stout?
Its not posh. It’s grammatically correct.

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I didn't say it was posh.

TotHappy · 16/02/2024 23:13

Springsombrero · 16/02/2024 21:58

”If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact myself” 😬🧐🤯

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Do we have kids at the same school? The head put this in a newsletter last week! And it was conveying unwelcome news so just added insult to injury.

XenoBitch · 16/02/2024 22:42

cardibach · 16/02/2024 22:39

That argument makes no sense. If you know the correct rules, why save them for best?

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Like I said in my PP, the correct way sounds wrong and jarring to me. I don't feel comfortable with it. I speak as my brain dictates. People still understand me, and that is all that matters.

cardibach · 16/02/2024 22:39

XenoBitch · 16/02/2024 22:38

If they know what I meant, then does it matter. Real life is not an academic essay.

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That argument makes no sense. If you know the correct rules, why save them for best?

cardibach · 16/02/2024 22:39

Lifestooshort71 · 16/02/2024 07:41

The late Queen regularly referred to 'My husband and I' on important court circulars and in speeches and some omefians/cartoonists took the piss out of it (can't quote names as it was many years ago). It made the 'and I' a bit of a joke so fell out of fashion. A shame as, I agree, replacing it with 'myself' is clumsy and just sounds wrong. Try saying 'my husband and I' without sounding posh.....

My husband and I are nipping down the chippy then out for a pint of stout?
Its not posh. It’s grammatically correct.

XenoBitch · 16/02/2024 22:38

PedantScorner · 16/02/2024 21:57

@XenoBitch , the rule is Remove the other person (and change the verb if necessary); does it sound OK.

Me and DH went out.
becomes
Me went out.

DH and I went out.
becomes
I went out.

You might not care, but others might.

Edited

If they know what I meant, then does it matter. Real life is not an academic essay.

cardibach · 16/02/2024 22:38

TurnTheKey · 16/02/2024 05:36

A recent one which grates on me is when someone says ' imma ' rather than I'm.
For example ' imma gonna try that ' rather than ' I'm going to try that '.
I feel like shaking them until their head wobbles off while shouting ' imma? What's imma? It's I'm, I'M for god's sake '

They don’t say that though - or at least I haven’t heard it. They say ‘Imma try that’. Imma is a contraction of I’m gonna. You don’t get the gonna (or going to) as well. I think it’s based on certain American regional grammar variations and has spread.

ColleenDonaghy · 16/02/2024 22:35

TheShellBeach · 16/02/2024 22:21

No, it isn't accent. It's called a glottal stop.

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And the glottal stop is a feature of some accents and not a feature in others.

TheShellBeach · 16/02/2024 22:21

Theedgeoftheabyss · 16/02/2024 22:14

Is it really?

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No, it isn't accent. It's called a glottal stop.

Theedgeoftheabyss · 16/02/2024 22:14

ColleenDonaghy · 16/02/2024 21:50

That's called accent. Nothing wrong with it.

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Is it really?

RosesAndHellebores · 16/02/2024 22:03

I agree with you @Ridiculous24.

"Yeah" is another irritation.

Springsombrero · 16/02/2024 21:58

Ridiculous24 · 16/02/2024 04:46

I'm sorry, I'm grumpy.
It's everywhere.
The top level at work are now using it. They have English degrees.

”If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact myself” 😬🧐🤯

PedantScorner · 16/02/2024 21:57

@XenoBitch , the rule is Remove the other person (and change the verb if necessary); does it sound OK.

Me and DH went out.
becomes
Me went out.

DH and I went out.
becomes
I went out.

You might not care, but others might.

niadainud · 16/02/2024 21:56

iceskater1 · 16/02/2024 05:26

This depends where it is in the sentence.

"Fred and I went to the shops" is grammatically correct.
"Fred and me went to the shops" is not.

"Jen went to the shops with Fred and me/ myself" is grammatically correct.
"Jen went to the shops with Fred and I" is not.

Take Fred out of the equation and you can easily see why:

"I went to the shops" vs "me went to the shops"
"Jen went to the shops with me"/ "Jen went to the shops with I"

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"Jen went to the shops with Fred and me" is fine, but "Jen went to the shops with Fred and myself" is most emphatically NOT correct.

When you would ever say, "Jen went to the shops with myself"?

XenoBitch · 16/02/2024 21:52

I say 'Me and xyz'. Probably incorrect. I don't care. It sounds jarring and weird to me the other way around.

ColleenDonaghy · 16/02/2024 21:50

Theedgeoftheabyss · 16/02/2024 20:50

What about the absence of a t sound in words like water? It seems to be disappearing. And people sound so sloppy when saying war-er. Whatever happened to pronunciation?

That's called accent. Nothing wrong with it.

Theedgeoftheabyss · 16/02/2024 20:50

What about the absence of a t sound in words like water? It seems to be disappearing. And people sound so sloppy when saying war-er. Whatever happened to pronunciation?

BeaRF75 · 16/02/2024 18:03

I agree, OP. Even people in very good jobs do it - I wonder whether they think it makes them look smart? Obviously, it does the exact opposite and makes me wince every time.

Fofftwenty21 · 16/02/2024 17:53

I noticed on The Traitors they kept saying "I'm voting for yourself" rather than you.

Garlickit · 16/02/2024 17:33

@Itwasafterallallaboutme, your examples are all correct 🙂