Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think it’s crap for the non-invited kids when party invites are handed out at school?

160 replies

GotMooMilk · 15/02/2024 21:56

Maybe overthinking as 7 year old has been really upset this eve. This morning one of the girls in her class was running around handing out party invites at drop off, about 80% of class invited from sounds of it? 3 girls not invited, DD included.
I know they can’t be invited to every party, that’s life. But just feels crap for the kids left out. All the other kids all excited, chatting about it and there just standing there awkwardly. Almost every party is organised discretely on whatsapp here so although I’m sure they talk about it it isn’t as obvious as it was this morning.

OP posts:
StarlightLime · 15/02/2024 22:22

Kendodd · 15/02/2024 22:19

YANBU
I remember when my kids were little they used to go to play group from 10 to 12 in the morning at a village hall. About 20 kids used to attend. One kid had a birthday party booked at the village hall to start straight afterwards from 12 until 2. Kids parent was busy setting up arriving with food etc for the party. Only half of the children in the group had been invited so they had to watch the set up and food coming in, then leave, because they weren't invited. Lots of the parents of the invited children looked really uncomfortable and embarrassed about it. Birthday kids mum seemed obvious and cheerily waved the uninvited children out of the building so the party could start. Kids were aged about four.

Some people have the emotional intelligence of a gnat.

StarlightLime · 15/02/2024 22:21

Yes, don't most schools refuse to allow invites to be handed out at school now? Clearly not all...

achangewoulddougood · 15/02/2024 22:20

Our teachers at Primary would take them from the kids in the morning and put them in book bags over brea/lunch so the kids didn't know until they got home. It was usually the nasty parents who'd make sure everyone knew...

Kendodd · 15/02/2024 22:19

YANBU
I remember when my kids were little they used to go to play group from 10 to 12 in the morning at a village hall. About 20 kids used to attend. One kid had a birthday party booked at the village hall to start straight afterwards from 12 until 2. Kids parent was busy setting up arriving with food etc for the party. Only half of the children in the group had been invited so they had to watch the set up and food coming in, then leave, because they weren't invited. Lots of the parents of the invited children looked really uncomfortable and embarrassed about it. Birthday kids mum seemed obvious and cheerily waved the uninvited children out of the building so the party could start. Kids were aged about four.

Phoeebee · 15/02/2024 22:19

Almost every party is organised discretely on whatsapp here so although I’m sure they talk about it it isn’t as obvious as it was this morning.

Parties like this still get around that some were not invites though. So maybe this is why.

GotMooMilk · 15/02/2024 22:03

Thanks I’m glad it’s not me hugely over reacting. It’s a good lesson and that’s how we are playing it and we are going to do something nice that day with the other girls instead I think but eeugh. I remember that sibling ‘left out’ feeling as a child and it’s just awful.

OP posts:
Lizzieregina · 15/02/2024 21:58

Yes unkind and unnecessary.

My kids’ school only allowed distribution of invitations if everyone (or every same sex as sometimes girls invited all girls and boys, all boys) was included.

Comedycook · 15/02/2024 21:58

So shit

irishapple · 15/02/2024 21:57

I've been there and it's heartbreaking. My experience was actually a very close friend not inviting my child and even I was hurt 😞

It's a good lesson though - try to take the positive from it

TheSnowyOwl · 15/02/2024 21:56

I think it’s unkind to exclude only three and make it obvious by doing paper invites. I hope your DD is ok.

Swipe left for the next trending thread