daughter was asked to leave homebase because she's under 18?

Children in care AKA 'looked after' are often in a bedsit or a flat at 16. I've taught a few.

It makes you wonder. I used to work in a farmers supply store and the after school workers were trusted to go over to the inward goods building where forklifts were operating. It was never a problem.

@Isitautumnyet23 seriously? Do you reckon 4yr olds are after your kitchen knives? Is the post person triggering you? I'm sorry you had a terrible time at 16. So did I. But it is possible for young people to be nice.

Different youth, different parents. I'd rather my teens were looking for house plants in Homebase than active on far alt rallies, personally. And I'd rather my kids became independent. Some of the terrible comments on this thread about the hatred and prohibition of 16yr olds is really worrying. And gravely thick.

She's a 16yr old girl. Where are you drawing your assumptions from? They were buying a house plant. One imagines you've got all kinds of form for being rude. But get a sodding grip, honestly.

I moved out into a bedsit at 16, I loved buying little bits for it from homebase or b&q, I'd have been upset at this but left the shop.
Well done for raising your lass to speak up, use her voice and not be a submissive person. We can't moan we're ingrained with "be a good girl/be kind" then when we don't raise our daughters to be placid complain they're entitled/hard work.

I'd rather my DD was able to question injustice instead of simply accepting it.

Kids buying plants and heated blankets really aren't the same as kids buying knives, let's be honest.

If you'd read the full thread, you'd have seen that I also wrote about the store's liability in the event of an accident.

I'm not a fool and I don't make the rules at Homebase or B&Q.

Perhaps the posters who accused the OP's DD and me both of being rude would like to comment on the language used by the poster I'm replying to? Or is it only autistic people and children who get tone-policed?

Entitled? To think she can go into a shop and purchase a plant at the age of 15?

The Shelter stuff I read indicated that the kind of accommodation that SS find for looked-after kids is hostels, shared housing, or foster care, all of which ought to come furnished and decorated.

You still need to buy stuff to decorate the flat though

It's legal arse-covering for the shop as much as protecting the kid, but legal arse-covering is also a good reason for having a rule.

If I hit a 15 yo with my car, that's my fault and comes off my car insurance. If DSis hits someone with her FLT, that's her company's fault under something called “vicarious liability" as long as she was obeying all rules and working within her training. In terms of legal liability, the road and the inside of a shop are very different.

I lived in my own flat at 16.

It seems ridiculous that 16 year olds can't shop in stores unsupervised. Just thinking of my own girls and how lovely they are, and their friends. I guess the more badly behaved ones have scuppered it for the polite well behaved ones.

How on earth do these 15 year olds manage to cross the road if they can’t keep safe in a contained area with some very slow moving and controlled fork lifts? 16 year olds can drive a moped in the roads and 17 year olds can drive a car but they can’t go in b&q?

👏💯

I learned long ago that many regular posters on MN will say black is white, just to be contrary. You have to wonder what sad little lives they have if this is how they get their kicks.

Ahh, the inconsistency of Mumsnet!

Everyday, posters are told to use their words and stand up for themselves; that we shouldn’t give into the misogyny that would see women silenced, yet when a girl/young woman does stand up for herself, she’s considered entitled.

By women, no less…

Good - not bothered in the slightest about that! You do you

I've just realised that I don't actually have to justify myself to you.

Anyway, I don't think the kid's unreasonable in challenging an arbitrary rule, nor in peacefully finishing her shopping. I'd suggest to @whatisgoingonitw that you teach your DD to check for age restriction signage on doors in future because there are some shops (e.g. B&Q with fork lift trucks rolling around the aisles) that aren't safe for under-18s and she can't go in those alone for good reasons.

You’re what? Definitely still waffling.

I'm pattern-matching.

I'm just going to repeat this:

If I could consistently tell the difference between polite and impolite, my line manager would not have have to take me to one side today to tell me that I'd upset someone, because I would already have known. I didn't know and still don't understand why.

What I described was the really unhelpful feedback I get when I get it "wrong" (according to NT people).

If you can acknowledge it then you can put in the effort to change it

I tried, I failed, it made me suicidal, I stopped. And I already said that in this thread.

With NTs, there's no consistency or logic behind "rude" and "polite". @GinaB8 said "Rudeness and being straightforward are clearly quite subjective" and she's correct. You can't even agree amongst yourselves what is and isn't rude, so how I am supposed to figure it out?

Interacting with NTs is like trying to play football with the rules silently changing every minute and being punished every time I break the ever-changing rules. Then you all act surprised when I simply stop playing the game.

@VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia You’re just waffling now