To ask if you love your partner more than you love your parents?

Good grief yes I do, I chose him I was my parents child as an accident of birth and as number 5 was a bit overlooked.

I get mighty peeved when people assume I would date again, I really wouldn’t because men irritate me very easily and he is the only truly tolerable man I have ever dated.

@theduchessofspork No, I wouldn’t date again 🙂

Yes… but you would date again OP, that’s how life works, you didn’t die with him in this scenario.

I'm like this too!

I love DH + DC way more than anyone else I have ever met in my entire life.

I’ve never been close to my parents or siblings and wouldn’t considered I’ve ever loved them or indeed any other extended family members for that matter.

It's a different kind of love.

Your parents are the only people who will love you unconditionally throughout your life, so they come first imo.

Partners may come and go

My partner is the first and only person that I feel securely attached to. It's taken a long time, but it is safe to express my emotions and needs to him. He supports me without me asking, and he has never let me down.

I wish I had that feeling with my parents, but I don't, and they can't/won't change, so I know that I never will. I feel a bit sad and guilty for saying that I love my partner "more", but there are reasons why my parents are the way that they are; they were severely emotionally neglected by their own parents. I do love them. It's not a secure love though, and they don't really know who I am.

Prior to having my child I would have said my husband. However, now I know what it’s like to unconditionally love a child, it would be my parents. Knowing what that love is like makes me truly understand how much they love me. I love my husband unconditionally but he could still choose to leave me and after the rocky year we’ve had, I know unconditional love doesn’t always mean you are compatible to live together. It’s a good thing I don’t have to live my parents ever again!! My husband is part of my soul and will always be my family regardless but you cannot touch that against the love for a child so my love for them has grown in understanding of their love for me

It’s a different kind of love but I truly love my partner and I truly love my parents

I do raise my eyebrows when I see people say that my “nuclear family” is my only family now (especially when it comes to things like Christmas). My parents are as much my family as the people I live with and always will be

And shock I also love my in laws. Not as much as my parents obviously, like my DH it’s a different kind of love but they still are part of my family

If life goes as planned my husband will be around after my parents are gone so I want to cherish every moment with them while I can (which isn’t every day as we currently don’t live near family but moving home because both sets of parents are not getting younger)

I never sit down and think about , of the people I love, who I love the most.

It is unnecessary to rank them.

Not till you start dividing up your actual kingdom and threatening to come and be a permanent houseguest with your 100 knights.😀

I'd say the bond with my partner is stronger, but also very different.
With parents it's more primal, there's a kind of involuntary loyalty that I can't break, even though I don't feel especially positive towards them.

I love them equally but differently. Until the day he died my dad would do anything for me; he was a massive support both emotionally and practically. He was the sort of dad who would drive an hour to bring me a coat because I mentioned I was cold. My mum is the kindest human ever and worships me, my husband and my kids. I adore(d) my parents.
My husband is a different kind of amazing. He’s my absolute rock and the first one I call when something good or bad happens.
My children come above everyone.

Definitely just a different type of love for me. I moved countries for my partner and miss my parents (we speak daily). My parents have shown me so much love and have always been supportive and protective, despite me moving countries. I still feel like I have a home with them. But when I visit my parents without my partner, I miss my partner terribly (despite speaking everyday), but in a different way. I like to cuddle for hours on the sofa with my partner, which I don’t do with my parents for example. So it’s different.

I love my parents more.

No I think I love my parents more. They do my head in but they love me unconditionally. My dad would give me the shirt off his back, he utterly adores me. Nobody else could ever take that place. I've had loads of boyfriends though and no matter how hard a break up, there's always another fish in the sea.

DP likes me but we rub along like flatmates mostly.

I'd say it's just a different kind of love, but it's true that the first person I'd turn to in almost any crisis would be DH, before my parents. He's the one I see every day and speak to most, by far, and he's the one whose absence would leave the largest hole in my life, now. Before I met him, that would've been my parents.

Also, you choose your spouse (unless you've had an arranged marriage); your parents are really a matter of luck. However much you love them, you didn't choose them... It's a totally different thing and not really comparable.

No matter how much you think you love your partner, the reality is if he died tomorrow and you are young enough, you would meet someone else different and love again. You can't get new parents in the same way.

Big no from me. I’ve already said if I ever lost my husband (we’re in our 20’s) I wouldn’t ever date again! And my IL’s are like my adopted parents 🤭 So he really is my everything!

My parents have never been my emotional centre. I have never felt love for them. I am nc with them now.

I love my DH although I am not sure I'd say he is my emotional centre. I am a very self-reliant person.

I love my parents and I love my partner but I genuinely love my cat the most. 😂 I don’t even care how bonkers that makes me. She is my emotional centre.

No matter how much you think you love your partner, the reality is if he died tomorrow and you are young enough, you would meet someone else different and love again. You can't get new parents in the same way.

Maybe it’s just different life stages and experiences but my perspective is different.

If you are with your partner for a long time and you share children they become part of your life in a way that can’t be replaced.

At least in the U.K. your parents aren’t usually part of your day to day life if you are an adult, and if they are lucky they won’t survive their children.

My child is my centre along with my parents. I have a strong caring protective love for all of them.
My partner I love too but my parents have given me everything and always been there for me. It's ingrained into my soul and I dread the day I lose them.
My DH is only just on the outside but I cannot bet my heart on anything but unconditional love.

A couple of weeks?! That's fantastic! My mum annoys me within hours 😂 My dad would annoy me almost immediately when he was around.

Love my parents, but they are starting their new lives now their kids don't need them any more, and good for them.

My husband and I get closer every day as our kids are out of the needy toddler stage. My kids are still my priority but they are less my focus as they grow.

So I'd say it changes throughout your life. It ebbs and flows.

It isn't a competition.
It is a different sort of love.