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Original poster

To not let my daughter have TikTok

111 replies

digimumworld · 08/02/2024 10:10

Firstly I want to know how many of you have let your children have TikTok or Snapchat.

My DD is in year 7 and has been begging me for TikTok and Snapchat for almost a year. She is now the only one in her friendship group without it and it’s making her sad (she says).

To convince me to let her have it she says she will let me set it up and I can apparently monitor her account if she goes for the under 13s options.

She could have easily set up a secret account so I appreciate that she is asking me and respecting my word on it (mainly because I’ve told her mummy can see absolutely everything you do on that phone - so no dodgy stuff!).

AIBU to keep her off these platforms for as long as possible?

I’m thinking of letting her have an account that’s closely monitored but is that possible to manage at all!

OP posts:
andymary · 08/02/2024 10:22

BabyBunnyMama · 08/02/2024 10:21

I think 7 is ridiculously young! My DD is almost 5 and the thought of her wanting to be using TikTok in 2 years time is awful! There is so much inappropriate content on there and no way to stop it popping up.

It is so annoying that there are so many parents out there who couldn't care less what their kids are doing so other parents are put in this predicament because their children feel left out.

OP's daughter is in Year 7, not 7 years old :)

BabyBunnyMama · 08/02/2024 10:21

I think 7 is ridiculously young! My DD is almost 5 and the thought of her wanting to be using TikTok in 2 years time is awful! There is so much inappropriate content on there and no way to stop it popping up.

It is so annoying that there are so many parents out there who couldn't care less what their kids are doing so other parents are put in this predicament because their children feel left out.

MaloneMeadow · 08/02/2024 10:19

@Flatpackedboxes Being careful re: social media is a good thing but I think this is a bit over the top. If I had banned Snapchat from my daughter at 15 then I would have been severely limiting her social life - it’s how teens communicate! What are you envisioning happening? Doesn’t make sense that you allowed her to have TikTok (far more toxic, disturbing content etc) but not Snapchat which is literally just about chatting with friends.

cocunut · 08/02/2024 10:18

OP does she have instagram? Instagram reels are basically the same as TikTok but seem to be less toxic? I’m not entirely sure.

DilettanteMum · 08/02/2024 10:17

Oh sorry I thought you said she was 7!

Ok yeah I think you may consider giving in on Snapchat but learn how to do the family account. I am still a no on TikTok though.

DilettanteMum · 08/02/2024 10:16

Absolutely not. Way too young. My daughter has Snapchat at 13 now but we don't allow TikTok. Snapchat account is part of family group so I can see who she talks to.

TikTok algorithm is so bad for mental health.

idontlikealdi · 08/02/2024 10:14

The TikTok dances aren't really a 'thing' anymore. It is all GRWM, skincare etc and I think something else will be released soon as since the Universal music has been taken down it won't be as popular.

AreTheyOrArentThey · 08/02/2024 10:14

No. Mine don’t have either on advice of others with older children who really regret letting their kids have them

all the kids we know communicate via WhatsApp and we have a rule no disappearing messages

edit to add ages, they’re 12&15

idontlikealdi · 08/02/2024 10:13

Well for a start there are no U13 versions of either in the UK.

I gave in to TikTok at end of Y7 but have held out on snapchat. You can't police it as the snaps disappear. DTs are y8.

I would hold out as long as possible.

cocunut · 08/02/2024 10:13

I think secondary school age for TikTok is okay. I remember being that age when Vine was all the rage and it was just silly quotes and songs really. I also think they like doing the dances on TikTok (so long as her account is set to private and monitored). Snapchat would be a no, it’s just a messaging app but I’ve heard a lot of bullying can happen through it. I’d compromise on TikTok but no Snapchat.

Flatpackedboxes · 08/02/2024 10:13

Absolutely not. I've had a hard and fast rule about no Snapchat. Eldest is currently 15. TikTok I allowed briefly but deleted it pdq. Eldest currently asking to sign back up to TikTok but I'm still very uncertain. She's autistic and has had mental health problems so it seems a bad idea to me.

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