Family didn’t pay

Yes, OP, that would explain it. 😐

They would probably pay then never speak to them again in dramatic MN style!

Why is splitting the bill awkward?
Here's the bill it's £X so that's £Y each
Job done

I would actually pay to be there when one of those who expect to be paid for was brazenly trying to avoid eye contact while everyone else asked if they were going to pay their share when the bill arrived, then the looks of confusion when they reply "But I was INVITED!"

Right lol 🤷🏻‍♀️🤯

😂

As others have said, this is MN, where many grown adults will sit and expect to be paid for because someone invited them. 😂
I don't know anyone, myself included, who would be so cheeky as to assume someone inviting me meant they were paying. I would expect to be paying my share/an equal split of the bill.

Never fails to entertain lol I only come for the comments and the occasional stir up 😁

And someone else who thinks that only their own experiences are ‘real life’ and is happy to pretend that other people’s lived experiences are somehow not real life. I feel deeply sorry for you - it’s such a pathetically limited way to live but I guess if never looking outside your little echo chamber makes you happy, you do you.

Yep I actually posted this somewhere else on the internet and everyone said they would never expect the person to pay for them if invited out! Another “MN thing” that doesn’t happen irl 😂

And I find it completely pathetic that someone is incapable of understanding that different people do things differently so there you go.

I find it audacious to think someone else will pay for you.

Just another hilarious MN thread of people who clearly have more money than sense 😆

Or even don’t expand their social circles if they don’t want to but at least recognise that different social circles do things differently.

It’s not the fact that lots of people split the bill that I find baffling (I’ve been known to go to meals with friends where I pay for my own if that’s how the invitation reads), it’s the stunned shock at the idea the host might be expected to pay and insistence that anyone who doesn’t split the bill is somehow ‘rude’, ‘entitled’ or ‘bizarre’ (to quote only 3 ways it’s been described on this thread).

Do you socialise with a variety of people or the same group of people all the time?

lots of different ways of living and entertaining out there!

I have split the bill, paid for the birthday girl or boy and picked up the full tab. I have had meals paid for for me too.

at my thirtieth I picked up the drinks bill.

the world is an exciting and varied place full of people taking different approaches! Maybe you should expand your social circles😊

I find it bizarre how many people on this thread find it impossible to comprehend that not everyone does things the way they do.

I have no difficulty understanding that a lot of people split the bill. Why do so many people find it impossible to understand the reverse? It’s even the traditional rule of etiquette!

I’ve never been out for a meal and expected others to pick up the tab. I’ve organised meal events and everyone pays for themselves or if everyone has been drinking alcohol, the bill gets shared between however many people attended. I find it very bizarre that people would expect to be paid for

But it’s not how she does it, it’s how everyone else at the table does it and all of them, apparently including her own parents and her DH apparently think it’s normal for the host to pay.

On top of that, she did nothing to suggest a split bill and took all the actions of someone who did intend to pay.

The whole situation is just strange and the OP ‘s belief that it’s all down to jealousy over a boat makes me wonder if she is one of those incredibly annoying people who deliberately sets out to appear a poor put upon martyr that everyone takes advantage of.

Right but the fact OP was aggrieved at the lack of thanks or offers of money suggests it’s not the way she does it either!

I 100% agree with this. It just seems odd that no one related to either the OP or her DH did so. It’s why I’d like to know what was said to the DH when the OP was away from the table. I note he seems to think the OP is being unreasonable (or at least that’s what I take from them having ‘discussions’ about it).

You still say thank you, cheeky mare

Lack of thanks is definitely rude.

however, I wonder if there was genuinely lack of thanks? It would be extremely odd not to say "happy birthday and thanks for the meal" to DH when leaving.
Does OP just mean that no one specifically thanked her? Reasonable for the guests to think that thanking DH implicitly included thanking her.

And I don’t, I think it’s normal. I’m just bemused at the people who think ‘not the way my family does it’ = ‘rude’.

Apart from anything else, classic etiquette says the host paying is correct!

They should have said thank you, of course but I do wonder what they said to the DH when the OP was away from the table.

Where is the thanks?

I think it’s rude and incredibly entitled of them to accept this

You were silly.

They were rude.

Nobody is jealous of your boat.