Really Annoyed This Morning ...

True. I removed a glass left upstairs during either my DH's wake, his birthday wake or possibly my birthday, meaning it's been their since either mid-Feb or mid-May. It was empty, but I have found cups of tea with a nice crop of mould in our art studio - DH used to forget about them. I'm not sure why anyone thinks this odd.
NB Came home from DD's today. Took glass of water downstairs. Pretty sure it only just replaced glass of water I forgot to take downstairs last time I stayed!
Still, men should not leave sheets on the floor. Kids should wash and dress and have breakfast before watching TV.

The problem seems to be that your husband is a lazy slob and you're letting him get away with it..don't! This is not a way to live.

Kids don't get TV until they've gotten ready.

It’s a nightmare, kids and husbands don’t clear up after themselves, good ole mums there to do it, so why should they, go on strike and say if you’ve finished with cup, plate, or whatever. Put in sink, dishwasher, wash bin, washing machine, or it stays there where you left it.

I know this is an oldish thread but…
Like you, I find it normal that dishes, pots, glasses will be scattered around various rooms in a family home.
Why the hell are some posters baffled or aghast at this? They sound like Stepford Wives.

I currently have a 2 year old. I can get some housework done, in fact she likes to "help" with some of it. Yours may have been house wrecking and defiant but not all are.

Simply Charlotte Mason on YouTube has a video about why reminding your child doesn't work to change their behavior. It makes them reliant on being reminded instead of self motivated. I don't know if this applies, and I haven't tried it myself, but it made a lot of sense.

You sound like your at at low and could do with someone to listen to you, which you have certainly accomplished today, men are such beasts, your put upon by man and kids, get some rules sorted, either they shape up and start helping or your gonna go on strike.

This may have already been said as I haven’t read the whole thread, but, it sounds like you’ve actually got 3 kids.

My New Year’s resolution this year was “I won’t be begging for laundry” and it only took my children (13 & 15) about 2 weeks to realise I really meant it. In your room? Not getting washed. Behind the door in the bathroom? Not getting washed. On the floor RIGHT NEXT TO THE WASHING BASKET? Not getting washed.

If I was you I’d be laying down the same rules with your husband at least! I’d step over those socks until the day I died!

WTF.

i don’t care if your a stay at home or homemaker or whatever. You are not a slave! Hubby can do dishes. put sheets in the washer, grab dishes on the way down, AND MAKE HIS OWN LUNCH.

7yo can help with dishes too.

Hide the dirty socks!

Lot of sympathy but does all that really matter in the big picture ? Get a grip.

None of this can't be solved by having an honest and frank conversation.

I have been a sahm for years until recently, now I work part time a couple of hours a day.

I do all the 'major chores' such as changing bedsheets, cleaning the bathroom, cleaning the kitchen, dusting, mopping etc.

But I expect the general daily household stuff to be 50/50 when he is at home.

We both pitch in with making food and clearing mess away, washing the pots, getting the kids dressed, rubbish/recycling, putting our own dirty washing in the basket, hanging our own wet towels up, bathing the kids etc...

While I am happy to take on most of the house work and being responsible for running the house, I am nobody's skivvy and I will never pick a man's socks up off the floor.

Don't presume or expect him to mind read, agree duties such as if you cook he cleans.

Put the dirty socks on his pillow for him to deal with.

Let him sort his own lunch.

Kids clothes laid out night before.

TV off (confused why it would even be on in the morning with the rushing around needed).

I don't see anything wrong with making the lunch. I do as I have to make mine for work so do his too.

I have twins, one of whom has ASD and ADHD and was a very challenging two, three and four year old!! But I did still manage to do the housework around the children, there was time off in between stuff.

I forget when they stopped napping but they did play together, and watched Winnie the Pooh DVDs, and did painting (ish 😀) and playdough etc at the kitchen table. Also I could shut the child gate to keep them in the sitting room while I hoovered etc. Maybe it's easier with two as they can entertain each other - and I was lucky they were both good sleepers - but it was all doable. DH obviously helped when he came in.

A two year old!!? Have you ever had a two year old?? It’s like a baby only mobile, house wrecking and defiant! This is utter nonsense. Two is almost the height of when you get no spare time whatsoever. I notice your username says teenage and I’m wondering : are you a parent yet? Because this is really a clueless statement. Doing her nails indeed! That’s precisely the sort of derogatory piffle that is really unfair and damaging. Actually are you a male teenager?

Cups.

Don’t you ever take a glass of water to bed, or have a morning cuppa there?

OK not all SAHPs are able to do housework etc because they may have several young DCs, or DCs with additional needs. I accept that it isn't always fundamentally a part of the role.

But one DC at school and one 2 year old would normally allow the SAHP a lot of free time beyond childcare? In which case, surely they would do household tasks during the day so that both parents are putting in similar hours? If that doesn't cover all the jobs then both parents would share what's left over - but it wouldn't be fair to spend your time doing your nails or watching TV and then making the other parent do extra chores when they come home from work.

I'm not talking about shit men demanding the woman does all the work because he pays the bills - and anyway it could work equally well the other way round. But the balance of 'work' should be as fair as possible.

Of course if DH comes home and does nothing, while SAHM runs ragged doing meals and bathtimes etc than it might make sense to have her time off during the day - but all these things should be agreed up front.

what I tend to do is make sure I am up and dressed between 6-7 and that gives me a bit of time to have a coffee in peace (sometimes this alone makes my day feel mine) tidy round a bit before I get my 2 girls up age 3 and 9. That might be an idea for you to help your morning go smoother if you do this ?

you keep an eye on the older on while helping the little one, I make mine brush their teeth in tandum and brekkie together everything in unison so they are both ready at the same time and usually that means they have plenty of time to watch telly or play for 15-30 mins before the school run.

My partner leaves for work before the kids are up and leaves his toast crumbs virtually daily on the kitchen side for me to wipe up, but what I like to think is in my head. I have all day to get the house straight and do all my other bits and bobs (play dates/hair appointments etc) nice and some boring jobs. When my partner only has a few minutes in the morning and very little time after work to get his stuff done/ have quality time with the children. So I just ignore the crumbs it’s not worth me getting annoyed about when I see me as the lucky one being at home ( I do work 2.5 days a week so suppose that helps me think from the rushed worker side aswell)

“Everybody needs to work in a household, either outside or inside the house,”

Well if you read a number of other current threads, sahps don’t “work”; I’m not sure what all the tasks they do are called but apparently they aren’t allowed to claim it is “ work,”

While this might be the obvious choice, the chances of it still being the same only now having the added stress of work and no time to do everything yourself. He's a man child and needs to take some responsibility.

It's petty but I'd just get her everything he strews across the house in a pile next to his side of the bed 😂 but seriously, have a conversation and tell him you're not his maid!

If my husband was a SAHP I would expect him to do my lunch and all the house hold chores, plus kids activities. We pay a person to do these which we would not if one of us was at home. You do not seem to have small kids, so what you are doing 8.30-3.30 while the kids are away? Everybody needs to work in an household, either outside or inside the house.