For letting 18 year old son lay on my lap

It's not at all wierd. It's actually lovely that he still feels comfortable being so close to his mum 🥰 your husband sounds like a knob! Is he jealous?

My son is 17, isnt autistic, 6ft2 and a regular lad but he will occasionally do similar. Not often but its not weird at all and your husbands being a grade A muppet. I also get big hugs off my 37yr old and35 yr old sons too, both married with kids and regular lovely lads. The one with the issue here is the weird husband.

Perfectly normal and wonderful proof of the loving bond between you.

Sometimes men get stuck in gender roles and want their sons to "grow up and be a man". Its a very old fashioned idea but the root is wanting to protect his son from ridicule. I don't think its relevant these days, its a very old fashioned, macho view of how a young man should act.

But it comes from a good place and
one intended to protect, especially if his son is neuro divergent. He has probably seen him hurt and wants him to toughen up to help him face the world.

You keep doing what you are doing and tell hubby he is being over protective. Your relationship with your son sounds good to me.

You seem like a lovely caring mum. Your DH sounds like a dick. Maybe his mum wasn't very loving towards him and he just thinks all physical contact is sexual.?

My son is nearly 19 and always does this. He puts cushions from the sofa on my lap and then lays on them. I have to tickle his arm or his head through his hair. My husband calls him a soft-head, but affectionately. My son does not have ASD or anything like that, sometimes he just needs a cuddle from mum.

I will let my children cuddle up to me forever, no age limit ❣️ leave your dh's opinion with him, whilst understanding he probably didn't have that kind of affection/feel able to be that affectionate himself at home etc

My boys ( 3 are adults now) are all huge cuddlers. If they fell asleep on me I would not move, just give them a gentle pat on the head. How lovely.

It's your husband that's being unreasonable & he must have dome weird insecurities. Nothing at all wring with that. My 20 year old son still does that sometimes if we're on sofa - I'll be reading or watching television & he'll lie on sofa with head on my lap looking at his phone. Perfectly normal, comfortable mother-son relationship. My 17 year old daughter got into bed with me this morning for cuppa tea & a chat - again, perfectly normal.

Your husband should be ashamed of his comments. What a knob!

Very strange reaction from DH there. I don't really get it. Is he terribly insecure?

Unfortunately fragile masculinity is common in adult men. Perhaps ask him to explore what made him react that way.

There's nothing weird about a mother loving her children or vice-versa. What's weird is how men have programmed themselves to be miserable and how they inflict that same misery onto their own sons (when they could change, grow, and sever the cycle of trauma).

Never to old to want comfort from your parent😞

It’s not weird at all . I still have a cuddle with my 24 yo DS .

My 24 yr old autistic son wouldn't think twice about doing exactly this with either his mum or me, and I am very happy that he feels secure enough with us to do it.
It does make me feel slightly uncomfortable but he's my son, I love him unconditionally and if that's what he needs, then that's what he gets and my discomfiture is my issue alone.

2,10,18,34... that's still your baby. I don't think it's weird... if you have a healthy relationship with your kids, they should be able to seek comfort from you however they feel comfortable. Sometimes you just need a cuddle... I'm 34 and wish I could do this somedays 🤷🏻‍♀️

Nothing wrong with being a continued source of comfort for your kids.

This is lovely OP. You've obviously done a great job raising him 😊

My 20 year old DS loves a hug and is often the one to initiate it. Both my DC are very huggy and I bloody love it!

Is your husband homophobic and/or misogynistic? Because that's where my head goes. Being a "mummy's boy" or being cuddly/affectionate is often seen as effeminate, possibly gay, and therefore "bad" in some way. Although maybe your husband has his own unique reasons for his weird opinion.

My teen did the same the other day, as he's had an operation and feels rubbish. Your DH is an arse. Guessing he's not close to his own mother.

My son is doing this right now. He’s just got in from college, pulled a throw over himself on the sofa, plopped a cushion on my lap for his head and fallen asleep.

Your husband needs to have a word with himself if he thinks that there's something wrong or weird about your son putting his head on your lap. Did you speak to him about how he addressed your son? To be honest autistic or not there's nothing wrong with him having his head on your lap. You're his mum. My daughter is 5 months old and I obviously cuddle her all the time, and I will cuddle her for as long as she wants to be cuddled, always!

People that think it's weird that says much more about you than anyone else

Is it fuck.

Figures 😟. Now he knows boys need affection too, just the same as I presume he sometimes needs a ‘soft’ place to lay his head.

Good for son that he has the confidence to seek and find that in you.

Both my 17 year olds, a Boy and a girl do this. Nothing wrong or weird about it.