Relationship with friends ex

Did ye?

A friend of mine, her sister and a friend all went out with the same man - not at the same time and no children were involved.

They found it handy to be able to compare notes

As I man I think it should be his responsibility to tell his ex especially as they have contact through the children and its amicable.
Be honest and open from the start that will build trust.
If it goes wrong that's her problem, not either of you imho.

Your happiness should always come first. Life isn't much fun if you are not happy...

The ex has moved on and he is free to see whomever his heart desires. If she has a problem with you two dating/marriage... to bad... besides, she left him, no longer wanted him...

Loosing friends... as mentioned above, make your happiness a top prority... friends come and go, if you loose a friend, make some new ones...

If you don't follow your heart, you may be missing out on somethingn very special... 💕

Hi friend! I'm so happy for you and your new 'joy'. I'm sorry that you feel stuck in such predicament with his X, though.

How about you & him, after making the decision to be in a romantic relationship, you two wait for 2-3 months before you share with anyone that you are together. This way you two find out if this thing you have for one another is going to work or not. Once you know that you're solid, together, you may talk with your friend, his X, and explain how it all happened from the beginning.
If she's a good friend, she'll understand, if she doesn't understand & validate the fact that you first consider her feelings, then she's noth worth your friendship and you should share from the rooftops, your love for this man :-)

Blessings to you!

This is a tough one, at first I was like go for it sis, I mean it's been over 6yrs and she also has moved on with her life. But considering they have kids together, You might have to talk to her first... Considering they have kids together, she will always be part of his life one way or the other. Talk to her to avoid any sourness in the long run. Especially if you get together and she isn't happy about it then his kids will dislike you too which is not what you want for your relationship to work. I hope it works out and you get your happiness.

Hiya, I think you should go for it and you are clearly being very thoughtful and respectful about the whole situation. Wishing you all the best x

6 years is basically a lifetime to not be with anyone, you arent besties with this woman, shes happy with someone else, why deny yourself happiness with false loyalty, this man could be your entire future. Go for it and dont look back. If it makes you feel better maybe let her her know (do not ask permission) xxx

Life is short, if you have a shot at something meaningful definitely take it. I would send her a message out of courtesy as you'll have contact eventually with her during child exchanges etc.

Everyone deserves to be happy, you do you.

This exact situation happened with a person I know. They unfortunately lost the friendship but the relationship is still going strong and they have a LO now, so for them it has been worth the risk! Good luck

Hi in no way are you being awful . Their relationship finished a very long time ago . I see no problem at all . Go for it . Don't let the chance of happiness go by . Talk to the your man friend and talk to your girl friend if it makes you feel better but even if she says not to it would jeopardise your friendship however much or little still go for it, she isn't a friend if she doesn't want to see you happy .

Another way to see it is...she knows and gets on with you. Would she not feel more comfortable with you spending time with her kids and if you got serious with her ex co-parenting? Isn't it better you than some random stranger she doesn't get on with and is no good for her kids. That's assuming you think well of one another. I'd go for it, but have a conversation early doors if it gets off the ground 👍

Are you and her even really friends if you haven't seen eachother for a year or more? At what point do you just become people who know eachother?

Go for it; life is to short.

I married my friends ex-wife (no cross-over; he left her and they divorced 8 year previously). I took him for a beer and told him we'd started seeing each other before he heard it from anyone else.

We're a decade on now; I still see him for a beer when he's in town.

all depends who you value more; if she were to have an issue then would you be mortified if she cut all contact with you and were gone from your life? Or were you nothing more than acquaintance years ago and don't have any contact with her in your life now?

They split up six years ago. She's married to someone else and has had a child with her new partner. You haven't even seen her for year so you're clearly not close friends. And you've known this man since you were at school!

So yes, I would go for it. Will she be annoyed? Hopefully not, but if she is... so what? You can't let someone who isn't even a close friend dictate your life choices. It's up to her and her ex to manage things with their kids.

Life is short. Grab happiness where you can.

you are both single. The ex has moved on. You haven’t spoken to her for a year.

date for a month or so and keep the kids out of it to make sure it works for you both and then really he should be the one to tell her as he sees her because of their shared children.

Yanbu. My friends ex and her former friend are now married and she's happy that her daughter has a decent step mum although she's not close to the friend anymore she was never best mates with her

Go for it.

I reckon just go for it, it might turn out to be a non starter anyway, he might do weird sex things that give you the ick or something 😂. But maybe if things are going well in a couple of months then drop her a courtesy message, just to say that you’ve been seeing him and you hope that she’s ok about it, and that you value her as a friend. Probably better to come from you than hear it through the grapevine.