In 2014 my father passed away. Two days before his death, I had a phone call from my dad who was crying; he told me that my sister had been into his house, found his Will and opened it, gone to his care home and asked him if he wanted to change it. His property was split equally between us as well as a gift to a local charity and a friend.
My dad said he felt violated and was crying.
She phoned me two days later to say I should come because he was about to pass away. (I loved around 250 miles away.
I didn't get there in time but received the phonecall while I was at motorway services.
The following day I went to see his body and be with him. The hospice care nurse told me that she has called my sister at first thing..around 7am and told her to call me. My sister didn't call me until late morning.
If she had called me at 7am I would've got to say goodbye to him and be with him. I didn't get to say good bye to my father.
Lots of things have happened beyond this and we are now estranged.
I feel devastated, I loved my sister so much. I feel. After nearly three years of trying to move on I still find myself in a place of horrible sadness and grief.
I've spoken to various people and they've said this isn't uncommon in families when a parent dies, families get damaged.
When I expressed upset to my wider family, none of them seemed to see it as a problem or say very much.
I have chosen estrangement due to this and other things I can't come to terms with while still in contact with them
My mother is getting older and the thought of going through this again is just completely overwhelming, the thought of having to navigate any of her care or her will with my sister makes me feel dreadful.
I have thought about asking to be disinherited. Writing to them and saying please remove me as a benefactor from my mother's will (if I'm even on it anymore)
The thought of that and being able to feel free any future horrible feelings and ties gives me a sense of peace.
My sister is considerably more well off that I am, married and I am a single parent. I am however fairly okay and don't struggle financially at the moment and plan to ensure that I can manage to support myself and my child in the future.
It would feel like a release to have no ties in this way to them and it would protect my emotional and mental state which has been poor at times and is now better following estrangement.
Should I ask to be disinherited. I think it would involve a solicitors letter.