To complain about how I was treated

Unfortunately life can be really shit and most of us do have to cope with that alongside working and raising dc. I know that sounds unsympathetic but the reality is, most of us do have to suck it up. You don’t work so you have an appointment you show up or you’ll risk losing benefits. You’re responsible for a small human who relies on you. Maybe tough love is something you need. Good luck!

OP has a terminally ill relative, and is going to be made homeless. This on top of her diagnosed MH issues.

Yes, I am sure she can just pause a death and eviction to appease the Restart scheme.

I agree, Richer. I'm sorry you are going through that. I can only imagine how much strength and fortitude it takes to get through the day and how exhausting it is for you and others who suffer too xx

OP. Please complain. Not just for you, but for others. It's disgraceful and ignorant bullying behaviour.

I also hope you can get some support from your GP.

I wish you well xx

Are you in receipt of PIP? Do you have proof of medication and professional input? Unless you are receiving help at a certain level it might look to them like you're making excuses. You need to access services if you're not already. If you're only prescribed antidepressants from your GP and are capable of looking after a toddler alone it could go against your claims.

Ywnbu unreasonable to complain. However, in order to get a good outcome for you I would focus it on what is going to happen now - what action you can take and what the restart coach can help you with. Also an opportunity to recap the facts without emotion.

You have a lot on your plate, that would be hard for everyone. Focus on the things you can control.

Sorry I agree with this. You need to get it together, it will be good for you and your daughter

Funny, a diagnosis and treatment arent needed until someone has to get a job

YANBU. She doesn’t sound professional.

Just sounds like you really don’t want to work, tbh

@Nocturna and some people have such poor MH that they can’t work.
It’s great to be positive and encouraging. But telling someone with MH issues that they can do this and they just need to push themselves is like telling someone with a broken leg to just get a grip and go for a run.
What is needed is appropriate diagnosis and treatment. Not a pep talk.

Ignore the unempatheric tossers on here, OP, I get where you are coming from. Please try and get some effective medication from your GP. It's taken me over 30 years to find a combination that works. I now work for myself and am happier doing that, rather than in an office environment. I enjoy socialising and work, but being cooped up with the same people day in, day out, the noise, the interruptions drive me insane. Find what you love doing and head in that direction. Working is good for the soul and food for mental health too. Good luck-oh and please do complain- the way you were treated was outrageous.

Shock horror, you have to work like the rest of us

I think honeywines message was more empowering and positive than yours though. It's telling OP she can do this.

@XenoBitch

Well said !

Sounds like you are not a suitable candidate for this program. You have a million excuses and zero accountability.

👏👏👏

@Sleepyevie9

Just wanted to send a supportive post, OP. Have no advice but to complain asap.
I have been spoken to like £$%^&* in a Job Centre when I was recovering from abdominal surgery. The DWP staff think they can say what they like, it's why the Job Centres are full of security guards.

I know the Restart programme with Ingeus (in Greater Manchester) and they are there to support you to find a job as you must have been referred by the Job Centre.

I get why you felt upset by what happened but I do feel she thinks you're giving excuses. They are not there to support your mental health.

If your mental health is on the floor, I'd make sure you get a doctors appointment and note and say this programme isn't for you. There are other ones you can do, maybe the one that supports your mental health?

Complain.

Some people (especially on this thread) have very little understanding of anxiety and depression. If some one can haul themselves to work or the the Job Centre, well bully for them. Not everyone can.

And being threatened with sanctions and poverty is not acceptable in this day and age. Being more in debt and facing decisions about whether to heat your home or eat does not somehow cure MH issues.

So because some people with MH issues can work and find their MH improves that means everyone can. Er no.
You can’t “power through” MH issues. You need proper diagnosis and treatment.

Do you really know this little about anxiety?

Fuck me, the lack of empathy and the ableism on this thread is astounding. @honeyinwine how very nice for your colleagues that they power through their issues. Not everyone can. Do you know what it takes for me to get on and do my job, look confident and act like I have it altogether? I come home and wait until my family are asleep and I hurt myself. My lower limbs are covered in plasters and I look like a mummy. Telling someone with ill mental health to suck it up is very poor indeed.

Op, complain complain complain. You did not deserve to be treated like that and I believe you.

In the gentlest way, it does sound like you have an excuse for everything. You don’t seem particularly enthralled about having to return to work, either. I’ve colleagues with social anxiety and depression and they do very well at their job, and the job has increased their confidence. Sometimes you really do need to suck it up a tiny bit, and push through. You’ve got this.

@Sleepyevie9 how does your mental health result in you missing appointments though????

She could have still spoken to op like a human being though and not like a fly on a piece of shit. There's no excuse whatsoever for rudeness and nastiness. If Op had clapped back she'd been hauled over the coals and had her benefits sanctioned for being abusive.
.