To be worried about my babies development?

My eldest didn’t crawl till 12 months, couldn’t pull himself up to stand either. He started walking and talking at 18 months. I actually did myself a shoulder injury as I had to carry him around for so long.

My youngest was so completely different, walking at 11 months. There’s nothing in your OP that would have me racing off to the GP.

Yes I agree, sorry sometimes I find with these things posting the ASQ when you know the baby won’t tick any of them is kind of a roundabout way of saying ‘yes there is an issue’. But I also take your point about showing they’re behind an average baby, not comparing to advanced older siblings.

I agree, but the ASQ gives clinical backing and evidence to the concerns and can’t be dismissed as being a mother ‘comparing her child to others’

In fact OP’s baby doesn’t tick any of the gross motor boxes - I think all the ‘he sounds fine to me’ is well intentioned but not actually helpful and could hinder her DS.

A 1 year old not weight bearing, cruising or crawling would definitely be in the black, I don’t even need to check the ASQ to know that.

OP, yes, I would be worried too - not in a ‘there’s something very wrong with him’ way but in a ‘what can be done to encourage him while excluding anything serious’ type way. I would go to the GP and ask for a referral, and not be fobbed off. The earlier he gets some help hopefully the sooner he can catch up.

Hope you’re okay, all this milestone stuff can be quite horrible but is sadly necessary.

What does he score on the gross motor section of the 12 month ages and stages questionnaire? Anything in the grey requires follow up from a HV or nursery nurse. Anything in the back needs to be investigated by a GP or suitable specialist.

http://www.somerspediatrics.com/media/1016/asq-12-month-english.pdf

I agree that babies develop at different rates. I would be a concerned though about some of the things that you describe. I don't think this is a physio referral because I think this is completely out of their scope of practice. He needs to see a paediatrician who has access to proper diagnostic tools to find out if something is wrong. It is easy for doctors to fob off women as anxious worriers about nothing because the doctor doesn't have to do anything then - not letters to write, no actual thinking. If we're not anxious worriers, it's all caused by stress. I think you are going to have to be very firm and unemotional - no comparisons with your other son at all and being very specific about the things you have noticed. If something is wrong the sooner it is diagnosed the better the outcome is likely to be.

One of my friends children didn't walk to 16 months, now very good horse rider, dd was running at 10 months but didn't talk till over 2...now aged 7 doesn't stop talking..my dn and dn never rolled but now teenagers they can walk, talk and do more complicated maths than me. Honestly it's all a range..if worried ask hv but if not worried try to not worry and stop comparing him to your 1st.

I always opt for fixing the physical needs first, you can go for private physio if he doesn't hit the bar for NHS physio yet. Work on lots of gross motor skills activities to build up his muscles, lots of swimming either at the pool or a very deep bath where you can support him and he can kick freely.
Invest in indoor and garden toys that build those muscles, wobble boards those expensive climbing triangles with slide attachments etc. even if he can't climb them yet he can pull himself up, push cars down the slide etc.

If you’re concerned get in front of the GP. All you can do is keep knocking on doors or go for a private assessment.

No one here can tell you that you haven’t observed what you have so rise above the sense you’re being judged and advocate for your ds.

He sounds fine to me and I’m pretty sure my dd was around the same at that age. She wasn’t particularly early for anything and pushing the boundaries of ‘late’ for a few milestones. She’s in junior school now and there’s no marked difference between her and her peers.

I agree that you need to give him more time and perhaps incentive. I’m a firm believer that babies don’t do things until there’s something in it for them. A more adventurous nature is likely to be incentivised to be independently mobile asap whereas a more docile child (like my dd) is perfectly happy ambling along content with their lot. They all get there in the end.

I will say though, I look back at videos of dd and can hear her clearly saying words that I didn’t pick up on at the time. Obviously it took some time for my ear to tune into her!

You're comparing him to your first baby, though.
Babies are all different. Mine all stood and crawled at different ages. As for talking, my second didn't say much till he was over two. He didn't need to, because his older sister did all the talking for him.

He's an adult now with a university degree.

Your HV is right. Give your baby time.

No 2 children are the same. What on earth do you think a health professional would be able to do about a baby who is not as advanced as you seem to think he should be? He's a perfectly normal baby. Just enjoy him. He will do all the things you mention, in his own time.

My 2 sons did things at different ages to each other. My grandchildren have been different. They've all grown up to be normal, healthy, intelligent, sociable people.