Man on school run

Do you drive when it’s walking distance?

@Frisps I would definitely do the 'is everything ok?' or something, like a PP mentioned. If nothing else, it can make people stop it.

I honestly wouldn't even notice someone staring at me on the school run as I don't bother trying to make eye contact with anyone except the parents I know.

😂😂😂😂😂

Make friends with him

Stare right back at him, unblinking, then slowly blink to show him you've written "hello" on your eyelids with eyeliner.

Stare at him back angrily or grimace at him to let him know he's been clocked

It's even more likely he isn't paying the OP any attention at all and is just doing the standard 100 yard stare that we have all perfected while waiting for school to kick out.

There is a big difference to someone looking at a you and someone staring. We all know the difference surely.
There are posters all over the tubes to warn men not to stare at women

What the OP is describing sounds unnerving and I don't know why so many people are belittling her or making excuses for him.

So now you are a victim if you think someone is looking at you? We all need burkas.

I've had this happen twice:

1. Mum at school with murderous resting face (big thanks to the person upthread who introduced me to that useful phrase) - we'd met before and I thought I'd offended her somehow but when I finally plucked up the courage to say hi and strike up a conversation didn't ever remember meeting me and clearly had no idea she'd been staring daggers at me for months
2. A guy who, for no reason at all, took against me in a weekly toddler music group and was properly horrible to me. Practically hissed with rage at me and I shouldn't come back to the group etc. We'd never spoken before. In every class after that he greeted me with this big creepy smile. It was really sinister and I was really shaken by it at the time.

"Hi,excuse me for being so direct and I hope you don't mind but I'm under the impression you know me or might be confusing me with someone else as you always look at me a lot?"

See what he says.

Now I’m a bit older I refuse to try & minimise men’s weird behaviour, or try & make excuses on their behalf. Over the years I’ve had so many threats, cat calls, starring, assaulting (let’s not minimise it by calling it ‘groping’). I’m fed up with the expectation that us women are expected to try & diffuse the situation by smiling & being chatty in response to some sort of threat.
In this situation I think you do to him exactly when what he’s doing to you - stare. Do not drop that gaze, do not smile or speak. Really exaggerate it, so he’s the one left wondering what’s going on. Let him feel intimidated & confused.

Do you sit with your engine running?

I’d ignore it of course.

Place marking

Could be a case of mistaken identity. ( Someone once approached my husband at pick up to " apologise for getting into an argument with your wife". I had not been in an argument with anyone.)
Maybe he thinks he knows you and is always wondering where from.
Or he's preoccupied with his day and doesn't notice you at all. It could just be that he has an unfortunate looking face or he's going through a very difficult time so is not smiling.

Stare him down right back. Creeps usually get weirded out when they can see they’re not getting under your skin.

Ask other mums and dads on the school run about him. Mention he always stares at you and it makes you feel uncomfortable. Hopefully it’ll filter down the grapevine and he’ll get the message and stop.

If he keeps doing it, when there are other people around stare back and ask, “Is there a problem? Do you think you know me? You look cross when you see me and it makes me feel uncomfortable. Please leave me alone.”

Agreed @Moonlightdust. Elsewhere MN is full of advice to women to ignore our gut instinct at our peril. Then, we find a thread where someone does flag these concerns, we see accusations of paranoia and other unmerited slurs on women's mental states. (The 'go to' accusation if a woman deviates from the behaviour rigidly coded for us is always that she's not all there).

My attitude to this doesn't vary: take notice of those danger signals, always. If you do, the worst that can happen is you'll be wrong. No one will have got hurt, he needn't even be aware, no harm whatsoever will have been done.

If you ignore that feeling and it does turn out you were right, sometimes for women the consequences don't even bear thinking about.

This

but also, maybe he is just shy and awkward. He may not know he is coming across as looking “evil”

Why? What a strange reaction.

why should you feel intimidated every time you pass a man on the school run?

Why should you not stand up for yourself?

Can you ask another parent who he is? In the school nearest to us, probably some people would yell, "You got a problem, mate?" Or something like that. So escalate the situation, basically!

Does he have a son in year 6?

I'd assume you were having some sort of a crisis and offer to help you call your carer.