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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Man on school run

337 replies

Frisps · 16/01/2024 11:36

I see a man every morning on the school run and he stares at me. Like a really intense look and what I can only describe as an ‘evil’ sort of angry glare look on his face. I’ve no idea why. Never spoke to him, never had any issue. He doesn’t know me or anyone I know on the school run. His children are in a different year group to mine so there is no issues there. I just always see him every morning. The first few times he did it I just smiled but now I keep trying to avoid eye contact when I go past him but I can tell he’s still doing it as I feel his eyes on me as I go past. I did think I was being paranoid but I’m definitely not. the last couple of days he’s also walked past my car when I’ve been parked and I’ve been sat in it minding my own business. I’ve looked out my windscreen and then as he’s passed my window I’ve felt his eyes on me so looked and he’s staring at me like that whilst looking into my car window at me as he passes. I’m starting to feel quite annoyed and intimidated by this. What would you do?

OP posts:
Mirrorinthebathroom123 · 16/01/2024 12:43

Connected1 · 16/01/2024 11:49

I would ask him, but first I'd want to be really sure that he is glaring at you.
Is there anybody at the school gates that you could ask to discreetly look out for him, and get an opinion from them if he is really looking at you angrily - i.e. it's not just his usual expression?
Or bring a friend along who would observe him from a distance?

Yes. I agree. Get a second opinion.

Then ask him why he’s doing it.

Take a photo too so he knows you have a record of him.

Megifer · 16/01/2024 12:43

Fireflymeme · 16/01/2024 12:38

Well if they've bought a Canada goose coat then they've already proven themselves to be thoughtless, self centred wankers so I doubt very much they would care what anyone else thinks. I just do it for me, these people are beyond hope.

I'm not a fan of these coats but since finding out the price I just assume every one I see is a fake anyway and filled with plushie toy snide fluff filling 🤣

and tbf surely people would boil alive wearing a genuine CG coat in the UK? It's never that cold!!

CatSighs · 16/01/2024 12:43

I've got an idea...do you leave your car engine idling while you are sitting in it? That always makes me glare at people!

hazandduck · 16/01/2024 12:42

Op I would do what someone else suggested and say “Are you ok?” Might startle him in to not staring any more!

I don’t know why but this thread is really making me chuckle with the Hallmark meet-cute and goose feather derails 😂

TinselTitts · 16/01/2024 12:39

Fireflymeme · 16/01/2024 12:36

Nah, they're usually too wrapped up in themselves to notice anything outside their selfish little bubble.

Oh give over

As if so many individual people wouldn't notice someone staring at them because of their coat filling 🙄😂

Alargeoneplease89 · 16/01/2024 12:39

Wink at him 😂

Fireflymeme · 16/01/2024 12:38

This reply has been deleted

Removed at poster's request due to privacy concerns.

Well if they've bought a Canada goose coat then they've already proven themselves to be thoughtless, self centred wankers so I doubt very much they would care what anyone else thinks. I just do it for me, these people are beyond hope.

Megifer · 16/01/2024 12:38

I'd do precisely nothing because it's probably just his unfortunate face and even if not, so what, someone looks a bit shitty.....oh well!!! Not everything has to be a big deal or challenged.

hazandduck · 16/01/2024 12:36

Justanothernumber1 · 16/01/2024 12:35

Bump into him while holding a big pile of binders, then bond when you both crouch down to pick up all the papers

🤣🤣 isn’t it a little early in the year for a Channel 5 Christmas movie!

Fireflymeme · 16/01/2024 12:36

TinselTitts · 16/01/2024 12:34

You'll do it to the wrong person at the wrong time and get a smack in the mouth one day I expect.

Assuming you haven't already?

Nah, they're usually too wrapped up in themselves to notice anything outside their selfish little bubble.

BlindurErBóklausMaður · 16/01/2024 12:35

kelsaecobbles · 16/01/2024 11:43

Perhaps he's noticed this strange woman who keeps looking at him ?

This. 😂

Justanothernumber1 · 16/01/2024 12:35

Bump into him while holding a big pile of binders, then bond when you both crouch down to pick up all the papers

Stringagal · 16/01/2024 12:34

MagpiePi · 16/01/2024 11:41

Is it his resting bitch face?

I had a school mum who looked like she wanted to murder me every day, very unnerving, but it turned out her face is just like that. Unfortunate.

TinselTitts · 16/01/2024 12:34

Fireflymeme · 16/01/2024 12:27

Do you wear a Canada goose coat? I always stare daggers at those cruel wankers.

You'll do it to the wrong person at the wrong time and get a smack in the mouth one day I expect.

Assuming you haven't already?

ReignOfError · 16/01/2024 12:33

I’d just beam brightly at him and say things like ‘morning! Lovely/miserable day! Nice to be back in a routine/not enjoying having to get up early at this time of year’ and see what he does.

Travelfan2021 · 16/01/2024 12:31

This reply has been withdrawn

Removed at poster's request due to privacy concerns.

Fireflymeme · 16/01/2024 12:27

Do you wear a Canada goose coat? I always stare daggers at those cruel wankers.

Beautiful3 · 16/01/2024 12:25

I had this with a mum on the school run. For weeks I moaned about it to my husband. He said to me, next time you see her make that face just say , "are you okay?" I did it, and she looked embarrassed, she never did it, to me anymore.

WhatWhereWho · 16/01/2024 12:25

Perhaps he's confused by a woman who's been angrily staring at him for months?

Or perhaps he's just looking around outside and you are not the focal point of his school run.

BobbyBiscuits · 16/01/2024 12:23

Maybe that's just his expression. He might be terminally hung over, in massive debt, just got divorced, has a terrible disease etc. Some people look terrifying but then you say something and their face completely softens and they turn out to be lovely. It has happened before when I thought someone was a right miserable sod and scary AF. Chatted to them and they were nice as pie!

SnowflakeSparkles · 16/01/2024 12:20

My partner is lovely but he has a very serious looking look on his face as a default. He's also a bit vain and concerned when his hair is longer that it looks scruffy or out of place so has been known to check his reflection in car windows 😅

If he's literally never said anything to you, it could be that he's just looking at you because you're looking at him.

He could also be an absolute creep, let's be real there's enough of them out there. I would just avoid and forget about him and stop looking at him to see if he is looking at you, because it won't change anything either way.

SkulkHollow · 16/01/2024 12:19

I'd do absolutely nothing. It's just a dad on the school run minding his own business. If someone came up to me and accused me of giving them daggers out of the blue I'd think they were fucking mental.

Crumpleton · 16/01/2024 12:18

KissMyArt · 16/01/2024 11:48

You only have 2 choices as far as I can see.

Ignore him or speak to him.

Or look him in the eye and don't drop the stare.

PuggyPuggyPuggy · 16/01/2024 12:16

Of all the people in the world, my mum really ought to know what my my face looks like. And yet, she frequently questions me intently on "what is wrong" when I am just blankly minding my own business. I have taken to saying "it's just how my face looks, ok?" And I'm considering progressing to "thanks for letting me know that my face is not acceptable, that's really cheered me up"

What I'm saying is that the expression others read into people's faces often has no bearing on the face-haver's state of mind

ManchesterLu · 16/01/2024 12:15

I got accused of this once, I had to explain that it was just my face. They were suitably embarrassed. Resting bitch face is awful, particularly when I am normally absolutely fine and happy!