Do you think men seeing escorts is common?

None so blind as those that will not see.

Not in my circle, no. None of my friends have discovered their partner doing this to my knowledge and the men in my life have never told me about someone else doing it. Obviously by nature it tends to be kept under wraps, but within my demographic there is an attitude and culture where its looked down on. Not for the right reasons/concerns of exploitation you understand, but more from a male pride perspective that ' having to pay for it' is the preserve of sad men who can't 'get it for free'.

Wired differently my arse, I’d bet he’d soon discover the problem with it if his wife started fucking random men.

I think it’s more men than we’d like to think and I also think very, very few of them actually care about if the woman is trafficked/forced or not.

2 men i know were talking about their recent divorces and how they are both getting on with Tinder and Plenty of Fish, they were both meeting a lot of women in their 40s/50s and slept with many of them casually and no protection.
They both said it was incredibly easy to sleep with different women on these apps.

I think you're really asking several questions here.

1 - Do you believe that a significant number of men go?
2 - Are you ok with the 'concept'?
3 - Could you understand it/accept it if sex has disappeared since kids/menopause, etc? (providing he takes precautions and doesn't blow the bank)

4 - If sex is a requirement for an individual in a relationship, would you always break up/divorce if they say they couldn't live without it. What would you offer as an alternative if you did not want them to leave?

I recall reading something suggesting 1 in 4 men at least once in their lifetime, perhaps it was at the time the Belle De Jour (?) memoirs were turned into a tv drama.

It’s extremely common. True statistics would be far more than 1 in 10 and it’s nothing to do with lack of sex or unhappiness at home. It’s far less complicated for a man, especially one in a long term relationship, to pay for sex then leave. As one escort told me “they pay me to go away”.

Women just don’t understand men. They’re biological and in an ideal man’s world men would have a harem. It’s nothing to do with love, it’s a purely physical drive.

The ones on here denying this reality vociferously don’t have a clue I’m afraid.

My only down fall is I have no trace of numbers I wish I could speak to the woman in question and ask her but she wouldn’t be able to tell me

You’re so right,. I am so glad I found this no rather than years down the line. We were looking a planning on a. House a baby and yet I find this on his IPad and he dare lie where it’s come from. I wouldn’t mind but this was not just the front cover of the website it was a profile of the woman and her profile information so whew did they come from exactly. The website is called Eva Escorts and on the tsb it shows the age name then when you press you get the profile showing: I just can’t believe he would do this to me in all honestly I am gutted and always thought he loved me

Also, to all the people on this thread who live in blissful ignorance... It's everywhere. Part of the thrill for a lot of men is the secrecy, so of course they are going to hide it in plain sight. What would they gain from admitting it? And what might they lose? Of course it's secret.

Think of the worst thing you ever did. Cheated on someone? Stole a packet of nappies on your buggy when sleep deprived? Accidentally got too much change and didn't take it back to the shop? Maybe even ran someone over accidentally, or hit someone whilst drunk? But would you go around broadcasting these upsetting things you did? No you wouldn't. And neither do these men. They are just men, your men, lots and lots and lots of different men. Prostitution is easy, cheap, accessible and they compartmentalise it like you wouldn't believe.

Men often think they are owed sex. They often see women as lower than them. OBVIOUSLY not ALL men, but waaaay more than you'd think. All kinds of men..It's not all stereotypical seedy kerb crawling of poor drug addicted women in mini skirts any more; it's in airbnbs, cheap hotel rooms with some poor woman installed, shared houses full of them, it's online booking, it's easy and transactional. It's a multi billion pound industry fuelled by gangs who traffick the women, children, men involved. It's twenty minutes out of their day and then on to the gym or to pick the kids up. It's been rebranded. Onlyfans is deemed acceptable, massages, gay spas, "escorts" instead of uglier terms like "hookers" etc etc.

We will never know the true amount of men paying to assault these women, but open an Incognito tab and see just how many are available right now, in your area. Yep... Supply and demand. It's huge. It's very stupid to try and pretend only the one loser guy you happen to know is doing it. It's laughably more than that.

@Lolla38 Honestly, get rid of him. Do it today, right now. He doesn't care about you. You do deserve better. You've just happened to catch him out this one time. Normal men wouldn't have that on their search history at all. The most obvious explanation is usually the right one... That he is ok with it, that he has done it before. Him ignoring your request to see his bank and phone history is a BIG red flag, and makes it even more glaringly obvious that this man has things to hide. What a piece of shit. He's not a loving partner, he is not worth your time.

You're left with a future hating yourself for choosing to stay with him, or choosing freedom and not having to wonder if he's paying women off to pretend they consent to having him use their bodies. Choose wisely because no man is worth that pain.

Yes I believe it’s quite common. Nothing shocks me anymore, especially when it comes to men.

I live in quite a small town, but know that it’s very easy to “book” an escort. There’s a website that lists them and gives their number for booking through WhatsApp.
Some of the men even leave them reviews I read them once, purely out of interest. I laughed to myself at how utterly deluded the men are “She offered me a shower” Yeah… because she’s so repulsed by you that she needs to ensure you’ve showered before you can go near her, “I think she enjoyed it as much as I did”.

A male friend of mine told me that he used one once ever on a stag in an Eastern European city in his 20s. He said they all did it, even the groom. Again, didn’t surprise me at all.

It doesn’t mean that all men visit escorts, but I still think there’s a lot that do.

I just don’t understand why you can’t be honest about it when iv pointed and shown your the profile of the woman, instead I don’t know what that is, no idea ho me that got there along with everything else in the reading list too. Hasn’t done anything to make me suspicious until I seen this, not really been out staying out places either so I just hope nothing has casually happened. But I def can’t trust him ever again as he’s not exactly jumping to prove me wrong just a lot of blaming and denying it. I wouldn’t have through the could do this to me and I hope it isn’t the case i really do but I just get red flags everywhere. I deserve so much better than that

Apologies, just read your update and am definitely not trying to lay any blame at your door for your husband’s actions op. I think a lot of people have some damage or a hidden side especially with sexual things and lots of us can recognise it in each other while others are genuinely just decent and nice and won’t be looking for for it.

I think men are generally quite interested in this stuff. And in porn and OF etc. But I don’t think it’s common, no. I think if you’re a woman with experience of men, you know deep down whether a man is that type or not and that it generally a good idea to avoid marrying them.

most men have used an escorts or sex works once in their life time.

i know several who are honest enough to admit it. Most just hiding it … even on online anonymous websites. They are lying to themselves… definitely higher than 10%

Deffinate loser and a fool to now of lost the relationship

Thanks for the comments on this.

the Article wasn’t actually anyone local but. As I say just a profile with everything about that 1 specific person, I did also type in doodle and checked history nothing was there for it but that’s not to say he hasn’t contacted this person on the profile or worse carried this out I only hope to go not it I will never know and this is the sickening thing. Google reports not sure how you do this? But I doubt il even see his iPad again now to be able to anything with it.

yes why is it takin him days to send thisnto
me when he’s so innocent,. Don’t get it, you’re ok or honestly want to make sure you were telling your girlfriend you were innocent and actually begging or forgiveness instead I just get blame and no apology or truth.

I'm talking about the general question, not your specific circumstances. You seem to be mistaking some people's replies to the thread to be replies to your post.

That said, for your specific circumstances...

• it is possible that the website saved itself to the reading list - certain websites (and generally, less than reputable ones) will have scripts that cause them to be automatically saved. I do view pornograpgy and pop up ads for local escorts are not uncommon - however, I have never personally had one save itself to the reading list (nor was I aware that they could, and I had to google to confrim that it is possible). Perhaps you could Google for any reports on the specific website auto-bookmarking.

• it is also possible that your "D"P used the website as porn, being excited by the notion of readily-available sex from someone round the corner and bookmarked it for future use as porn, but has not ever used a sex worker and had no intention of doing so.

If you have not already done so, you should search the device history to see if the website appears in there, then you might be able to tell whether it looks likely to have been a pop-up ad. That said, if he is using the iPad for porn, you'd think he'd use incognito mode.

There is also the very real possibility that he has been using sex workers and, just because other explanations exist does not mean that they are likely. I think you're doing the right thing asking for bank statements and alike, and I would also suggest getting yourself tested for STDs as a priority. The fact that he has taken days to produce statements that would go some way to clearing his name is a concern because you'd think that, we're he innocent, he would want to ease your fears on an urgent basis.

I’m not sure seeing an escort is that common, although they’re hardly
going to shout it from the rooftops. Porn use is definitely hugely underestimated - I expect they pretty much all do, to a lesser or greater degree.

I just don’t know what to think all I know is you click in it and jr came straight up with the profile and a woman and in the readings tab.

No. I am a man who comes from a generation ("boomers") where a man having to pay for sex was the sure and certain sign of a loser.

I don't think things have changed that much.

I'm a man and I think the figures from studies, being in the 10% range for "have done so at least once" sound about right.

I post on an almost exclusively male website, where users are anonymous, and there was a poll on there not so long ago and the percentage of men who had paid for sex was lower than 10% (but there's probably an issue as to whether the site's demographic is representative of the general population).

Anecdotally, and I'm certainly not a "guy's guy" and generally have more female than male friends, I am not personally aware of any man I know having paid for sex (though I'm not naive enough to think that means that none have).

I certainly don't think it comes anywhere close to being a majority of men, let alone "most men" as some seem to think.

Apparently it’s a just an advert now. What difference does it make it’s still saved. 🙈

All men near enough