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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think there are a lot of nasty people on Mumsnet?

287 replies

Poile · 09/01/2024 14:31

Just that.

Have seen so many directly aggressive and passively aggressive comments on here that it makes me think that many mumsnetters are just plain nasty. Assuming to due to unhappiness with own life.

Some examples stick out - when people ask to guess their age some of the guesses are just rude and over the top inaccurate. One poster even questioned a person’s gender even stating they had thick eyebrows which were not groomed due to depression. The disingenuous of “please don’t think I’m being rude but …”.

Also saw someone ask for help with their curtains and the amount of snide remarks was shocking.

I also think a lot of people in here think their way is best and the only way. Insufferable.

To me the people who will kick a person when they are down just seems disproportionately high. Obviously the fact it’s an anonymous forum adds to this.

OP posts:
NonPlayerCharacter · 09/01/2024 15:39

I don't generally point out spelling and grammar errors... I make enough of them myself, even without autocorrect doing it for me. I'd do it only when it actually matters, for example when someone is trying to put someone else down for making mistakes and their own post is riddled with errors.

Doodleflips · 09/01/2024 15:38

MeinKraft · 09/01/2024 14:42

This is about the only place where women aren't expected to 'be kind' and simper over each other so I'd rather that did not change if that's ok with you OP.

There’s simpering and ‘being kind’, and there’s being gentle with others and not deliberately being an arsehole.
its a middle ground.

GarlicPotato · 09/01/2024 15:37

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 09/01/2024 15:08

The thing that really gets my goat is posters carping about grammar and spelling errors in the OP or using them as evidence of sub-par intelligence. I really can't stand it.

I am a pedant but would never ever point out mistakes online. There is no way of doing it without looking like a petty idiot. And when people relentlessly mention it to a vulnerable OP who is struggling in a challenging situation, it is downright unpleasant.

Jumpingpogosticks · 09/01/2024 15:35

I've realised this more and more over the past few months.
Unhappiness breeds more unhappiness I guess.

Brefugee · 09/01/2024 15:35

MaryDroppings · 09/01/2024 15:26

Last week I c&p all the abusive comments in just one thread and posted them together in a single post to highlight just how nasty people were being. My post was deleted and all the posts I took the abusive comments from still stand. Go figure!

because you need to report them.

it really really is that simple - report the comments. If MN let them stand, you probably need to step away from the thread/topic/site because it clearly isn't suitable for you.

auntyElle · 09/01/2024 15:35

IncompleteSenten · 09/01/2024 15:03

The men that come here not in good faith tend to be perverts or mra with an agenda rather than here to be randomly spiteful.

You don't think 'perverts' and MRAs can be spiteful?

Have you seen men respond to an online rejection? "You're a fucking ugly bitch anyway" etc etc but angrier.

Mercurial123 · 09/01/2024 15:35

The guess my age people are annoying. They need attention.

OkPedro · 09/01/2024 15:33

I'm having a right laugh to myself here.. mumsnet worse than Reddit 😂 some of the forums on there are batshit
But it's the internet.. in my experience it's nothing to do with if it's Mumsnet or Reddit.. people can be arseholes nothing new there

WellFinch · 09/01/2024 15:32

I never post on the guess my age ones because they are tedious beyond belief. It’s not so much age it’s looks people want a comment on and honestly most people lie in a nice way on those with your gorgeous when they obviously are anything but gorgeous. If you think MN is bad then go and look at other forums this is actually overall very mild.

vodkaredbullgirl · 09/01/2024 15:29

Poile · 09/01/2024 14:54

I’m just hoping to understand. I’m on many Reddit threads and don’t witness it there

You could always stay on Reddit and not bother with here, if it's that bad on here.

JudgeJ · 09/01/2024 15:28

WeeJimmycranky · 09/01/2024 14:37

There's a thread a week saying this on average. I don't think it's that bad but I don't read every topic of course.

Make sure you're using the right 'average'!

ghostyslovesheets · 09/01/2024 15:27

@MaryDroppings if you reported them to MN and they didn’t delete then they must not have broken any guidelines

your thread did as it was a Tat

PossumintheHouse · 09/01/2024 15:27

Emmainexile · 09/01/2024 15:08

@PossumintheHouse its factually true though.

also it’s hardly a diverse range of members. The vast majority of posters are white women of a certain age. That is a fact.

Diversity doesn’t just refer to skin colour and age (although I’m not totally convinced your suggestion is factually true). There is a massive range of experiences and expertise on here. More than the majority of forums.

RestingCatsArseFace · 09/01/2024 15:27

Some posters are very unhappy and like to belittle and pick on others, some are just goady fuckers who like to start a fight, some are too stupid to realise that people have feelings and come here for advice. Some are just nasty arseholes.
After a few years you tend to ignore them, not worth the time reading their posts.

MaryDroppings · 09/01/2024 15:26

Last week I c&p all the abusive comments in just one thread and posted them together in a single post to highlight just how nasty people were being. My post was deleted and all the posts I took the abusive comments from still stand. Go figure!

ghostyslovesheets · 09/01/2024 15:23

Who wants £10 for correctly guessing the ‘men’ on this thread

clue it’s not me

PossumintheHouse · 09/01/2024 15:23

Has nobody reported the numpty comments yet? And, go on, somebody do the subtle Emma comments, too. I can’t be arsed. 😂

Emmainexile · 09/01/2024 15:21

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Emmainexile · 09/01/2024 15:21

@NonPlayerCharacter oooh here we go

I bet you think I’m a man

and why would that be?

because I disagree with you.

No one mentioned posts MRA’s would be on until you brought it up.

The point still stands, for some posters to think the only people being assholes on MN are men is a bit laughable.

jacks90 · 09/01/2024 15:20

Yeah the name calling is getting pretty silly.

gothicomedy · 09/01/2024 15:20

Any chance a particular two posters would take their argument elsewhere? It's becoming boring for everyone else trying to follow this thread.

NonPlayerCharacter · 09/01/2024 15:19

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I think there are some men who will pose as women online in order to find, obsess, hang on, follow and insult a woman over absolutely anything because it's the only orgasm they ever have. Emma.

TommyNever · 09/01/2024 15:18

Megifer · 09/01/2024 14:40

"Guess my age....oh no im not 21 I'm actually 96" posts are fucking tedious though tbf.

Yes, I avoid them as I tend to expect mature people not to exhibit themselves in that inherently demeaning manner, nor to care how old other people think they look.

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 09/01/2024 15:18

PossumintheHouse · 09/01/2024 15:17

A lovely, ironic descent on this joyful thread, I see.

I know 🙄. Think it always happens on these threads though !

Emmainexile · 09/01/2024 15:17

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