to leave 9 week old baby with Grandparents to baby sit for a a few hours?

I'm self employed and regularly left my DD from 1 week old for short periods to work. She was BF but would take a bottle - first tried bottle at 6 days old cos I had to work the following day. DH, DM, DF or DBro all looked after my babies while I worked & found popping my dressing gown over their clothes helped them settle. It was stressful at times. Look after your own MH. Sometimes it was easier to bring baby plus DM or DH with me to work too so you could try going to hairdressers or dentist together & have coffee etc

I do think that was a bit too long too soon yes and EBF babies do just need to be with mum still for the first few months.

I suspect your parents won’t want to be in sole charge again for a bit as they don’t sound like they coped that well and tbh it’s really stressful trying to give a bottle to a EBF baby who won’t take it.

Just take your baby to the hairdresser with you. And the dentist. I did both and the baby stayed in pram but then I could feed if needs be. Same with shopping. They are actually still quite portable at this age as they sleep.

Its later it’s harder when they are on the move or want to be standing on your legs at bouncing at around 16 weeks.

anyway try to forget it what’s done is done but I would just take the baby with you and keep your appointments

They all just need to get used to each other. Try again for shorter time in a few weeks, let them build up their confidence. For haircut make it clear DM can bring him to you for feed if needed . Keep doing it though as you have a wonderful resource there and lovely for baby on going

I think it's fine! It's your parents and you won't be far away.

My mum looked after my baby when she was 10 days old so I could go to the registry office. She still thinks very fondly of the time she was with her and they have a strong bond

I wouldn't go but I see the present as manipulative anyway. It's up to you with who and when you decide to leave your baby. After what happened there is no way I would be leaving my baby with them again. 'Just been crying for 30 mins' - that's half an hour which is a hell of a long time for a tiny baby to be crying with hunger. Absolutely not.

If you really need the dentist and your DH can't come I would possibly ask your mum to go along with you so you are on hand to deal with any upset asap.

Also, sometimes babies cry. If they can't deal with it they can't babysit.

My pils were in their 70s when dss were babies and they coped fine. Depends on how frail they are?

How about leaving a t shirt you've worn to drape over either of the pil on side where baby's head is being fed?

Try them offering a bottle when you’re there to help everyone get used to it.

Make it a bit shorter next time and build up. It would be crazy not to take the babysitting opportunity, you getting time out is good for everyone.

You certainly don’t need to feel bad it, just experiment and build it up.

I sympathise OP. I have a 5 week old and we give one bottle a day in the evening, it definitely gives a bit more freedom and less pressure knowing that a bottle is an option so I'd try to get baby more used to bottles if I were in your shoes.

My parents are brilliant for childcare and will mind my 2 year old anytime but they aren't confident with very young babies so it'll be a few months before I can leave my youngest with them for a couple hours.

I think its too soon and sudden. I'd have DM cone with you and the baby to the appointment, feed in the car, then dm go fir a walk, you meet her in a nearby cafe or something after.

Pop round to see your parents, leave for an hour, go back. Build it up.

And practice the bottle. Dc1 never did take one. It was difficult!

Is there anyway you can have a quicker haircut? Say just have a wash and cut. At a nearer hairdresser? Or a home hairdresser?

Start with some shorter trips out. For eg the dentist. Give everyone time to get used to it.

I have a 9 week old, my second, who is also EBF. My mum is super hands on, but I wouldn’t leave DS with her for that long at this age. They are still unpredictable and can get really upset if hungry or tired. I’ve left him for half an hour at a time if I needed to pop out to run an errand.

Looking back at my first, the first time I left him for more than an hour was when he was five months. Otherwise, he came everywhere with me or all of us would go to wherever I needed and DH would walk around with the baby.

I know it’s tough not having any free time, but as PP said, that is the cost of an EBF baby - you can’t really leave them.

I think at that stage I managed a 10 minute walk before I had to turn round and come back! It's tough. It does get easier. Your baby is still adapting to being outside of you.

Do they want to do it again?
It sounds like it was not an enjoyable time for them?
Had they tried DS with the bottle before you left him?
I wouldn't be able to relax during time away if I was worrying about either DS or the carer not being ok.
I can't remember what I did. DS2 didn't ever have a bottle. I must have made sure he was as fed as can be and left him with H (now ex) for a couple of hours.

Am I reading this right, it's only 2 hours you would be gone right?
If so I would say of course go, and let your parents babysit! Let them/ ds have a bit of a practice with the bottle beforehand though.
Babies cry, no harm done. It's really good to get a baby used to being left with trusted people- you have to have a break sometimes!

EBF is very hard in situations like this. My DH had the same look when I nipped out to pick my sister up from the train station. I had only been gone for about 45mins.
It's all about practice and timing. Make sure you BF just before you leave the door.
Take a pram, if baby starts crying tell them to pop her in the pram and go for a walk.
Build up your time leaving them together.
You will get there 9 weeks is pretty young to leave the baby tbf it's a reasonably usual response xx

I would probably wait a couple more weeks. I remember 3 months being a huge turning point in terms of how settled DS was. At that stage, I would leave him with my parents for a couple of hours when I went to a regular medical appointment.

Perfectly acceptable for them to look after baby for a couple of hours when needed .
However you need to practice the bottle feeding first and get baby regularly and reliably happy to bottle feed .
Stressful having a crying hungry baby but not being able to feed them .

i would leave it for a month

It’s hard isn’t it. None of mine would ever take a bottle when they were really little. I did go to the hairdresser once when my eldest was just a few weeks old and left him with my sister and mum, mum was only 50’s then though. I didn’t really relax and couldn’t wait to get back to him. He was fine though. With my other two I just didn’t leave them until they were a bit older and going longer between feeds. The middle child was a boob monster so no way of leaving her. It’s still really early days. For now I’d just try to arrange things when your DP is around. It won’t be long before they’re on solids and will be happier to be left with others.

Why didn’t they take him out in the pram?