to leave 9 week old baby with Grandparents to baby sit for a a few hours?

I don’t really think you can leave him until he will take a bottle. When he will, it’s perfect fine to leave him with people you trust.

I had my granddaughter for a couple of hours when she was about 12 weeks. I was terrified, even though she’s not my first grandchild. She just slept, pooed and ate.

2 hours is a very long time for a 9wo breastfed baby to be left, especially when he's not used to the bottle.

I do think you were BU

When you become a parent you need to put your child first. You and your DP should have made sure he was used to a bottle if you were going to leave him for such a long time.

If he was formula fed it would be different story with the amount of time, but 2 hours is ridiculous at that age.

At that age I would say an hour is tops and even so your parents should have your number and be able to call you if they think he's getting hungry, not just have him cry for god knows how long.

One of mine would only take a bottle from me. Helpful!

Yep both of mine took bottles from me no problem although it was very rare that I'd be the one to give one.

Not always true. Some breastfed babies do take bottle from the mother. My son did.

Your comments really aren't well thought out are they thejanuarypinks?

I wouldn't have any concerns about the ability of 'fit and healthy' Grand Parents to safely look after my baby, guessing they've probably got some past experience of that from somewhere 😉 but only once baby is happy to take a bottle.

Maybe invite them round to yours to babysit while you're hovering in the background somewhere until baby is content with them doing a bottle feed then try again at their house.

70s is not too old, my in laws are in their 70s and cope fine with a small baby for a few hours. I do give them and my parents some direction with feeding as it’s a bit different feeding a breastfed baby.

Also you can leave an EBF baby at a young age, I went for a spa evening with friends for around 5-6 hours and baby was fine with dad. He will take a bottle though.

Don't feel bad about it,, either for your parents or DC. I think maybe something like a dentist appointment should be fine as it's short but seeing as it looks like it may have been hard work for your dm for a longer slot, work up to longer babysitting times. It'll get easier for everyone as time goes on anyway

Yes, we left ours for a week when we went skiing overseas when ours was 14 weeks old, they'll be fine

It isn't unreasonable at all if they are ok with it. I'd continue to do it too, maybe sometimes just for 1 hour if they aren't too far away so that baby can get used to it more. I'd also have them feed baby whenever you visit so they get used to it.

Baby will be absolutely fine.

It’s sad that you’re on a thread and purposely being a dick. No one who’s got two brain cells to rub together thinks that all mothers have the luxury of staying at home.

@anarchicparadise

if you’re going to say a gift is manipulative the expect to be called out on it.

You are not an authority here to 'call me out' - you are simply someone who has a different opinion. That doesn't make you any better or more right than me. Just different. Whatever it is you think you have done to me here I can assure you, you haven't.

presumably the massage does not have to be redeemed immediately and is just a gift from mother to daughter as a treat.

Quite. And only OP knows the relationship between her and her mum so OP can decide how she views the gift. My point of view is no more right or wrong than yours.

I would let baby practice more with bottles and also tell GPs to just feed junior at the first sign of distress.

It’s quite likely they’re of the “feed baby every 4 hours generation” and let him go too long thinking it “wasn’t time”.

Im not quite their generation, but EBF didn’t seem to be as common back then so lots of people don’t understand it’s very different to formula feeding.

I think having someone who’s excited to watch baby for you is beneficial all round so I’d definitely try again.

My baby is 11 weeks, and there's been a massive difference over the past fortnight. He now has way more happy awake time and shorter feeds.

At 7/8 weeks I went out for a massage but timed it for his big afternoon nap and didn't go far.

Now I reckon he'd last quite a while on the strategy of feed first, I leave, husband takes him for a walk, quick cuddle when he comes home, sensory TV, nappy change all would happen before a feed.

I wouldn’t have been happy with any more than an hour at that age. Both of mine were bottle refusers. I remember going for a haircut and my Mum walked the baby around in the pram while I was in the hairdressers, is that an option?

Just do it. None of them will get used to each other if you don't.

My DS was left with grandparents overnight from 6 weeks (although wasn't a BF baby), GP were in 70's.

The relationship they had was something quite amazing. DS now 17 would chose DM to hang out with over pretty much anybody.

I found it hard in some ways not having time to myself definitely! I don't want to underplay that - but it kinda is what it is if you ebf. It's always an option to formula feed if it's too much and I really would encourage women who find it difficult to consider that.

Personally I found the thing that worked best for me was putting the baby in a sling and then going out - mine slept incredibly well in a sling and, although it's clearly not alone time, I found it really good for my mental health

@spriots

i know what you’re saying but I do think 12 weeks is a long time to literally never be able to leave the house without your baby!

You are not unreasonable to want to have your parents look after your baby for a couple of hours. And 70s is not that old. The issue is you have a (mostly) exclusively breastfed baby who is still so tiny. I think you need to get DC much more used to taking a bottle from your DP (if that’s what you want) or probably wait until weaning is underway before asking your parents to have your DC for more than an hour.

if you’re going to say a gift is manipulative the expect to be called out on it.

presumably the massage does not have to be redeemed immediately and is just a gift from mother to daughter as a treat.

70s is quite old to be confident in sole charge of a young baby. I know it’s normal for grandparents to be older these days but you can’t really expect a 75 year old to be able to cope with their grandkids in the way a 55 year old would have.

my in laws were fine looking after my DC in their late 50s early 60s as babies but I wouldn’t even ask them now they’re mid 70s if I was to have another (never going to happen, just an example). Maybe don’t pressure them to be in sole charge of the baby again until he’s a bit older and easier to entertain.

It's really only for around 12 weeks which isn't that long to wait for a haircut in the grand scheme of things. At that point feeds become more predictable/cup becomes easier if bottle refusal is an issue.

An hour or so for the dentist can be done with most ebf babies just not lengthy hair appointments/shopping trips.

@BreatheAndFocus

does it though when you can’t even to a dentist or hairdresser appointment on your own? I think that’s very hard as most people really need me time, time to themselves