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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not want two overnight guests in a one bedroom flat?

32 replies

cassandracusses · 27/12/2023 10:31

I live in a flat slap bang in the middle of London. Can be at Oxford Circus in 10 minutes on foot.

Live there with dh. Suits us perfectly because we can walk everywhere and we are out working all day!

It’s a tiny flat. Maybe 40 sqm. The only bathroom is through the bedroom. Kitchen and living room are one room. So I guess it’s like a bigger studio really!

We have a blow up mattress for friends who need to stay. Usually after a late concert or a flight etc. One person is fine for one night if they understand the layout.

My parents love visiting London. They come down from Manchester to see shows, museums, exhibitions. When it’s just one of them, it’s ok for them to stay the night. A bit annoying to have to rearrange the living room and then wash and dry sheets.

But now both of them want to stay overnight at the same time. Four people in a 40sqm flat is too cramped. Poor dh says he is fine, but I know he likes his space.

AIBU to say no to having two overnight guests?

OP posts:
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Caroparo52 · 10/04/2024 18:49

OneLollipop · 27/12/2023 10:36

Of course you're not being unreasonable. It's your home and it's tiny. Tell them one at a time is fine but not both together. If they both want to stay they can get a hotel room like everyone else.

This

SpringSprungALeak · 18/03/2024 06:49

Edinburghguy · 27/12/2023 17:11

Maybe 1 night it’ll be ok but beyond that, it’s too much.

The bathroom situation could get very nasty if more than 1 night.

@Edinburghguy

'nasty' ??? What?? Why??

SpringSprungALeak · 18/03/2024 06:48

EmpressaurusOfCats · 27/12/2023 14:07

Yes, but OP doesn’t say whether she’s got a dryer. If the sheets have to go on airers, having more space does make it easier.

Show quote history

@EmpressaurusOfCats

But two people in an airbed or one (that's she's fine with) makes no difference to the sheet washing

@cassandracusses I'd give them my bed & have a wee before bed, but remind them that we might need to go through for a eee in the night.

having grown up with one bathroom/shower & 2psrents, 2 kids, I can't see the issue with that aspect.

19lottie82 · 27/12/2023 17:19

It’s your parents, and it’s one night. I’m failing to see how two of them will be much more of a problem than 1.

Edinburghguy · 27/12/2023 17:11

Maybe 1 night it’ll be ok but beyond that, it’s too much.

The bathroom situation could get very nasty if more than 1 night.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 27/12/2023 14:17

AuntieMarys · 27/12/2023 10:54

Premier inn

This, or anywhere else that isn’t ££££.

Gymnopedie · 27/12/2023 14:13

Will it be just one night though? It might be this time but what if the parents decide it would be good to do it regularly? Or that it could be even longer next time? But the precedent has been set and it's harder to say no.

And if the visitors were OP's ILs would people be telling her to suck it up and tell her she was being mean or would they be saying they had to get a hotel? Telling her it's her home too, not just DH's?

Zombiemum1946 · 27/12/2023 14:10

If its just one night every now and then, just give them the bedroom.

EmpressaurusOfCats · 27/12/2023 14:07

Tacotortoise · 27/12/2023 11:05

It'd fine to say no but the washing/ drying sheets would take equally as long no matter how large your flat.

Yes, but OP doesn’t say whether she’s got a dryer. If the sheets have to go on airers, having more space does make it easier.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 27/12/2023 14:05

One night and it's your parents? YABU

Isthisreasonable · 27/12/2023 14:04

Assuming they are more likely to need the loo in the night, give them the bedroom and you crash in the living room. Perfectly OK for the odd night. They know the set up so must be ok with it.

tescocreditcard · 27/12/2023 14:04

There's plenty of hotels in London, just put them in one of those for a night. They can see you all day and night, go and sleep in nice hotel and have a cooked breakfast then come back and see you in the day. job done.

Tinkerbyebye · 27/12/2023 14:02

It’s one night. Give them the bedroom, you do blow up mattress or sofa. Just tell them you may walkthrough to the toilet

Olika · 27/12/2023 14:00

Try to get them stay in a hotel

Muchof · 27/12/2023 13:59

I had more than one over night guest at a time when I had a one bedroom flat, it was perfectly manageable, but the bathroom was properly separate. The bathroom access would be the reason I might say no to this, but then I would say no to all guests not say one is ok but two isn't.

CharlieCoCo · 27/12/2023 13:46

from your headline i was going to agree as thought would be 2 separent guests, but unless your parents are actually separated then i think its fine for the night, they come as a team and will be sharing the bed. the sheet changing will be the same. the bathroom will be a problem with guests regardless.

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 27/12/2023 11:47

Yanbu. That's literally what hotels are for!

oneleggedspider · 27/12/2023 11:44

I'd be worried if you agree to it this time it'll set a precedent. But if they aren't likely to visit again in the next 6 months id probably go along with it for a night.

luckylavender · 27/12/2023 11:36

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 11:10

I can’t see how one on a blow up mattress for one night is fine but not two. It’s one night, I’d be ok with it.

It's not just about the sleeping though is it? The bathroom is tricky.

Lampzade · 27/12/2023 11:31

I would manage for one night
I would give the parents the bedroom .

Beautiful3 · 27/12/2023 11:29

I would for one night, for my parents. But it wouldn't be a regular thing. Just very occasional.

marmaladeandpeanutbutter · 27/12/2023 11:22

I think you'd rather put up your friends than your parents.

Dotcheck · 27/12/2023 11:18

Both your parents or your friend + - parent?

If it’s both parents I would say yes, but let them have your bedroom. Parent + friend I would say no to friend

melj1213 · 27/12/2023 11:14

Absolutely fine, if a bit of a squeeze for one night but as long as everyone knows that's the situation then it's up to them to accept it or not.

For more than one night, definitely a hotel.

Gardeningtime · 27/12/2023 11:10

I can’t see how one on a blow up mattress for one night is fine but not two. It’s one night, I’d be ok with it.