To casually mention to my neighbour about his coughing

Yes , he’s been coughing for weeks and his first thought should be about you and your comfort?!!

If he tries to not cough that will probably make the coughing worse.

You you you.

Are you listening to any of the reasons people are giving you? There are dozens of genuine reasons he may be coughing.

My poor family has had to listen to me cough for 2 weeks (no one has complained). I can't help it and you can't really cough quietly any more than you can sneeze quietly!

GP did say if it's not gone in 2 weeks to go for a chest x-ray so maybe ask him how he is and if he has seen a doctor.

Sounds like op could piss herself off in an empty room

Oh behave yourself OP

I have a cough September/October through March. Annually. I'm asthmatic, take heavy duty steroids, daily throughout winter, and antihistamines year round. I don't cough for fun, and there is sweet fa i can do about the noise beyond coughing into a pillow. I co sleep with 2 littles, and they sleep through it fine. I'm sure you'll adjust if it's a chronic issue, and be glad it's not you...

I don't think k you understand what 'triggered' means. It doesn't mean getting pissed off at your neighbours.

I've been coughing for a year or so now, unfortunately it's quite a loud, barking type of cough. There's absolutely nothing I can do about the sound and if I try suppressing it it just gets worse.

It's annoying and deeply embarrassing. I dread being out in public because of the judgment.

I've been back and forth to the doctor's, had numerous tests, inhalers, medication and am due to go for a lung function test. Long Covid has been suggested as a possibility.

Maybe your neighbour is aware that his coughing is loud, and has sought medical advice, but is literally unable to do anything about it.

This has got to be a wind up

Gods sake, what is it triggering in you?
Are you startled?
Are you jumping in fear?
Are you pissed off?
Are you pissing yourself?
Are you coughing yourself?

Triggering what?

Frankly if you could explain it, the power of mumsnet can think of many things to help.

Whatever its triggering in you, it wont stop him coughing, so you'll have to learn to live with it. We can help with that.

What is it triggering?

A dew weeks? I wouldn't pretend to show concern. 6 months in? Sure.

My son had bad allergies and used to clear his throat a lot. One day he was in the car with a family we carshare with and the dad told his son to tell my son to stop 'doing that'. That was the last time my child car shared with them . A simple 'are you ok' would have shown empathy instead of what he said.

What exactly is it triggering? Apart from annoyance

OP have you tried playing white noise though a speaker?
You can't control your neighbour's cough but you can try and lessen its effect on you - white noise is excellent for blocking out unwanted noise.

If you live above him, I can absolutely assure you he will be hearing far more noise from you, than you will be from him.

I had my upstairs neighbour mention my coughing of a night time. I am asthmatic and my asthma is worse at night. I religiously take my meds but the doctors and I are trying to manage it better. I don't cough all night, usually just as falling asleep and waking up, but I do have a couple episodes in the night too.

That being said, I also hear them hacking up of a night, usually after smoking weed. Mine are more frequent (and as such, I'm sure much more annoying) short coughs, but sounds far less gross.

I also hear their dog barking at 7am. I also hear them shagging. Talking very loudly on the phone at a rapid rate and for ages, at 11pm when I'm trying to sleep. I hear them stomp off to the bathroom in the middle of the night - I hear it because they wake me up in the process.

You're absolutely being unreasonable to even consider mentioning anything. As annoying as it is, he can't do anything about it, and it's probably making him super uncomfortable (I know my coughing does - it annoys me!!). Put some gentle music on if music doesn't bother you. It's what I do when I get fed up of the incessant loud chattering away from upstairs of a night. Or when their dogs doing my tits in.

Bare in mind, if you dare mention anything about the involuntary coughing, he's probably going to come back with all the noises he can hear from you that annoy him. And don't even bother saying you don't make any noise - if you live above someone, they hear you. They can probably hear you when you fart, if you can hear him cough, to be fair. Noise travels worse into properties below, than it does above. So be prepared to hear some truths you may not like. You'd absolutely deserve it as well if you mentioned anything.

Oh, and don't feign concern just so you can bring it up. You're not being as clever and subtle as you think you are, and he'll be right onto it. Being 'concerned' for someone coughing, and even mentioning it, is weird as fuck.

Thank you@VladimirVsVolodymyr So, so grateful for better health this year. I did have antibiotics last January - couldn't access them earlier - and slowly, but surely I improved. That cough was awful, just like choking and trying to breathe, especially at night. I've never smoked in my life. It was a winter type bug, which any of us could feasibly get. It's only because of my experience with this, that I can't believe how rude and entitled the OP is being here. I would have given anything to have been able to breathe! Coughing into something when trying to gain air just isn't an option! Thanks for your understanding!

Yes I vote 'wind up', because of the triggering.

👌

This thread has got to be a wind up? Xmas eve and all that?

If not, OP he may have chronic cough, like I have, decades of coughing.

You: hello neighbour
Neighbour: hello
You: that's a nasty cough you have
Neighbour: would you like me to stop?
You: that would be marvellous
Neighbour: my pleasure
You: super