To think some romance scam victims are simply stupid?

Thanks to this thread I've been obsessively watching the Catfished youtube channel. Just saw one about a Californian widow on her seventies that handed over hundreds of thousands of dollars to what appeared to be two separate men (was probably the same group of fraudsters though).

Both their alleged pictures were of relatively attractive, retirement-age white men and both said they were Americans, so I did wonder why alarm bells didn't sound for her that the "boyfriend" she was regularly talking to on the phone had a very obvious accent and clearly didn't have English as a first language.

It's honestly like some sort of self-hypnosis and I think it's all going to get even worse as AI improves. Our brains just aren't evolved for any of this as PPs have said.

I’m currently watching the woman who thought she was talking to Gerard Butler. She sent him £350k to help his charity as he was running out of money.

Im sorry I know these people are vulnerable but come on?

Really interesting observation about the internet. We haven’t had time to evolve to deal with this means of interaction. Quite scary.

@SomeCatFromJapan
Yes, it is like it becomes part of some people's brain I feel. Like virtual world stuff but only in their own minds and, as you say, building mental fantasies.

I wonder if it allows the victim's own brain to do a lot of the work? Instead of a real person in front of them they can build these mental fantasies of their perfect person.

@MrsOvertonsWindow
'Psychologically what has happened to them that they dismiss the most serious of warnings?'
I wonder if the 'US officer/Special Ops guy/A&E Consultant in war torn country/M15 operative/Head of Foreign Affairs/celebrity' actually turned to meet them in their local coffee shop would they still hand over large amounts of money (or any amount) there and then? My feeling is that generally they would not.

I truly believe that there is something about the internet which determines some of these behaviours. Perhaps also linked in to sending money at the touch of a button rather than taking cash out of the bank and physically counting it out or even writing a cheque and sending it.

Are there any studies on how internet manipulation works on people? Would be an interesting read.

Has anyone heard of Mark Acklom?
Blinkin' 'eck, he romance frauded a woman out of over £800k, but was only convicted of £300k worth of fraud, due to the way police deal with logging fraud cases. He showed this woman around a commercial airport in the UK and told her all the aircraft there belonged to his company and she believed him. When all his deceit came to light, it turned out he had persuaded the Leeds Building Society into giving him a £400k mortgage while he was still a teenager in the '90's, he told them he was a stockbroker and they believed him ! He must have had such an arrogant swagger !

I think this is spot on.

Why do these women in the series choose to lie to their bank, the police and their families when told it's a scam? What's happening in their heads that they look at a police officer and think, "nope I'm going to believe this man I've never met asking for tens of thousands of £££ over you warning me I'm being scammed".
Psychologically what has happened to them that they dismiss the most serious of warnings?

I've had a romance scammer contact me on Mumsnet! Obviously thinks I'm a single mum sad case. Telling me how he's successful and wealthy and just wants to meet someone to share it with as children are the best things in the world. And he was amazed at my elegant and intelligent posts and wanted to find out more about me
😂Obviously I ignored but they're here too!

I saw this too (yesterday's programme with the woman scammed out of 113k)! Her bank tried to stop her making one of the payments as they suspected fraud/a scam and she admitted that she lied to ensure that she reassured them sufficiently to make the payment to "Bario" I kept thinking "how can you be so stupid?!"

Perhaps there is an arguMent to be had in terms of whether some of these women to be deemed to not have capacity.

I mean it's one thing to initially fall for these scams, still stupid but whatever, but after they're confronted with the evidence maybe they need to be blacklisted somehow, blocks put on their accounts to prevent them making bank transfers, their credit record being amended to prevent them getting into debt.

I have limited sympathy for the ones who are stupid enough to fall for these scams in the first place, I have 0 sympathy for e.g. the 88 year old this morning, and I absolutely think she should be prevented from making any more transfers. If she's going to behave like a stupid child, then she needs to be treated like one.

It really was a heartbreaking case.

The worse one I saw was not so much the amount of money still 30k but that she had said to her daughter don't ask me to choose between the two of you as you won't like the answer! Nice! A man she has never met! I saw one lady give away 430k OMG...... these scams have been going around for years and many programmes such as this on the TV warning people....you would think people would have cottoned on by now! These people are pure evil who exploit the lonely and vulnerable.

Sure is weird. One track mind. Odd behaviour.

Holy fuck is there no limit to the obsession some people have with fucking Brexit? Just recently there seems to be someone coming on to every thread to blame everything on Brexit, it's really weird.

I felt sorry for her until she said she would choose him over her own family. It’s an awful thing to say.

My mil did this recently. She's in her early 60s. She had met a man online who apparently was real as he sent photos lol 😆 Mil was off work sick and always complaining of having no money and told us she couldn't buy for the grandchildren this Christmas but had been sending £250 iTunes vouchers to this "man" luckily my bil saw their amazon account and asked her about it before she sent more money. I just can't think why anyone would give money to people they have never met

I want to have sympathy but some of these stories are so ridiculous.

The 88 year old was told by the police that she was being scammed but she refused to believe it and sent him £36 grand. Even now she tells the presenters she thinks it’s 80% that he’s genuine - she even said she would put him before her family.
They’ve shown her 💯 proof he’s a scammer and she’s still refusing to block him and wants to carry to talking to him,

Did anyone watch today’s episode? The woman threatened to chose her imaginary man over her own daughter 😡

@Goatymum that drama was absolutely devastating and I couldn’t watch to the end. I have an uncle who is gay, lives alone and not out to most people who know him. I like to think he wouldn’t fall for such a scam, but I’m not sure.

Millions of people still apparently want Brexit even though they were lied to and the "sunlit uplands no downside, just a considerable upside" Brexit doesn't exist

Older women going to the Gambia or Turkey and dating very young men isn't much different to the old blokes dating young women from the Philippines and Thailand etc. The old ones have money and the young ones want it and will use youth and bodies to get it.

Just watching on catch up now and there an 88 year old woman who thinks she’s in a relationship with a man in his 40’s who works in NZ.

Without being too harsh, why would a middle aged man be interested in a widow approaching 90?

I have always wondered how a supposedly sane woman can truly believe that this is really George Clooney himself who smiles at her from the photo and sincerely wants to marry her and only needs some money for the ticket because there's some trouble with his bank card.