Sister has started shoplifting

Not necessarily. If she is filmed stealing, that story won't work.

Yes you would. And why would you want to go in any shop with her ever if she’s stealing?

Many of us are on low incomes or struggling a bit. We budget, we buy cheaper brands, buy reduced food etc. But we do not steal, even worse to steal with your child with you. I’d rather pay twice for something than for someone to think I would steal.

There is no way on this earth that I would accompany a known shoplifter into shops. If she gets caught, you could well be a suspect too. There is a high likelihood that you would also be identified as a potential shoplifter. Do you want that?

@Kittenkitty If it’s upsetting her and she’s ashamed but is doing it anyway then I’d say it definitely is a sign of a mental health problem. It implies her behaviour is involuntary almost like an addiction. That is not a sign of someone with good mental health.

Is she bored with her life and this brings a bit of a thrill / excitement into it, she is probably getting an adrenaline rush from getting away with it which can be very addictive.

It really is only a matter of time before she is caught, they could already be watching her as there are only a limited number of ways for people to shoplift and I’m sure security personnel know of them all

I would tell her that shops are using facial recognition software, some are, and ask why she is risking her job/marriage/reputation/whatever is more important for her by stealing?

I'd be concerned that if she's doing it regularly in a particular store then they might have recordings of her doing it multiple times and she won't be able to claim it was a single act of forgetfulness. Whether stores actually do that, I don't know (but Transport for London definitely do it with habitual fare dodgers).

Is she using a loyalty card during checkout? Cos she's literally giving the store her name and address when she shoplifts.

Is it just the men's prisons that are overcrowded and criminals aren't serving sentences of less than 6 months, or women's prisons too?

Maybe point out that getting a visa for the USA will be difficult with a criminal record, if she has any desire to ever go there on holiday.

I doubt it’s any sort of serious mental health issue, maybe an element of unhappiness, discontent, boredom etc. or it could just be plain old temptation, I’ve been tempted before in shops with how easy it would be to walk out with something instead of paying for it, I’ve not done it but it’s a thin line to cross.

There was something on C4 Steph's packed lunch about this this week, might be worth showing her the clip. It was about a woman who previously shoplifted, and now she had turned her life around and was helping the police to catch shoplifters. It's true that police/ security staff build up evidence about someone's shoplifting before approaching them and potentially banning them or giving them a criminal record. It was really interesting!

@Ahhifollowifollowyoudeepseababy if they have her on cctv putting the items under the bag - or the plain cLothes store detectives catch her - she’ll be allowed to go through checkouts etc and stopped upon trying to exit the store.

shell be escorted somewhere private. She’ll be informed that they watched her.

she’ll be informed that the police have been informed and are in the way.

the police will issue an official warning and possibly a fine from them or the store.

she will be banned from the store and possibly others.

a letter will be sent to her home…

the information may be shared informally with other local shops as managers and staff talk.

And let’s hope she isn’t doing it in a shop in a small town where people she may know work there… word gets around.

and once it goes public you’ll also be labelled as the woman who’s sisters a thief and possibly tarred with same brush..

Don't blame having light fingers on the menopause ffs.

Is this actually true? I also read this on Reddit but it’s always a friend of a friend or that ‘someone heard’ but I have never know it in real life.

Sounds like it is nothing more than she made a genuine mistake got away with it and now finds it a game. She won't stop until she is caught. Just never go shopping with her.

I’ve heard of some shops building up evidence for multiple instances before confronting someone so she may find gets charged for loads at once. I really would warn her about that. It’s not worth losing her job over.

Any chance she has ADHD? Shoplifting and getting away with it can give a dopamine buzz which is what people with ADHD crave.

also I’m intrigued to know how and why she told you. Was she upset or ashamed? Or is she proud of herself for getting some freebies? Her reaction and how she shared the info may go some way to telling you about her motivation.

holy trinity, certainly its not worth the risk, if col is high then theres always supermarket branded items and other cost reduction methods, unless all those methods have been tried then there is no excuse for stealing (and there should not be an excuse anyway) @Ahhifollowifollowyoudeepseababy

Why? She has a good job, she’s not on the breadline stealing bread.

I’m not saying OP should report her but someone will hopefully see the grotty thief and report her.

Telling you has to be a cry for help

I do not what would happened but getting caught would be highly embarrassing 😳

Have you noticed anything else unusual about her recently OP? I know this is probably nothing at all related to what's happening with your sister, but I know someone who suddenly started shoplifting and it was the beginning of their first bipolar manic episode.

If she genuinely can't stop, can she afford therapy? This kind of risk taking behaviour doesn't come out of nowhere.

Nothing will happen to her though if she's caught stealing at that level. So crack on anyone that fancies a pop at the supermarkets 😘😉