Son having sex: Everyone has an opinion that I didn’t ask for

Your son is an adult, you could try offering advice about birth control if you are worried he'll be irresponsible or lacks information, but his sex life it isn't your business. If you're not comfortable with him having a girlfriend to stay in your home, you have the right to tell him not to of course.

It would be weird if you were 19 in a relationship and not having sex. Of course they’re having sex!!! And probably lots of it.
as they should at they’re age. Like I imagine most of us did at 18/19!

My 19 year old has a boyfriend now I take it back I am shitting myself. She must finish university first. I am very close with my children and very overprotective. I had no outside family support it was only me and my partner. My partner is always upskilling gas engineer, pest control, property surveyor. He is jack of trades master of none. I have 4 children 19, 17, 15 and 8 you need money to look after them they are expensive we run a business. Hairdressing course that we decided to pay privately for, university and we decided to send my 15 year old to college because the schools are shocking around here. My 8 year old goes to school but I am undecided about secondary. I am 40 now and would love one last child and would definitely go for one more.

You found me and I have decided to share with you a snap shot of my life. There has been ups and downs along the way but I wouldn't change it and let's be honest it could have been a lot worse. My children are happy and stable with it just being the two of us playing mum, dad and grandparents.

what do you mean by this?

Still waiting for the deletion…

But he's 19.
I'd moved out at 19 and lived with my boyfriend.
Managed not to get pregnant without my mum knowing anything about my sex life

You would have needed to lay down with smelling salts if you'd had my son.
At nineteen, his bedroom was like a brothel. We used to joke about putting a red light outside his door.
I never felt the need to discuss it with friends op.

A boy of 17 was accused of sexual assault I met this young man when he was in year 10 in my daughter's school. Another man who my partner met brutally killed a 15 year old because his nieces told him that he raped her and a friend. Children can not take responsibility you have to as the parent. You can't twist what my life is and that is a parent.

You've already backpedalled, stop trying to deflect and attack and change the subject. It's very boring and transparent. Don't attempt to police legal consensual sex because you think it's a bit icky and all is fine. I don't know why this normal, simple concept makes you so angry and defensive.

I imagine most 19 year old men are having sex and do your friends not know what condoms are for? He is unlikely to be having a baby if using condoms. Given that he probably is going to be having sex at his age finding condom wrappers should be reassuring that he is being safe.

Until they are 18 I take full responsibility for what happens to them. Is it easier for you not to give that responsibility to yourself by letting your children do what they want?

I told you nobody cares about how mad and crazy you all are. Just stop trying to police consensual, legal adult sex. You don't own your daughters.

"Hanky panky", my lord...

I have strange children then like I said you should meet them and then decide. I am not lying I had a hard time growing up read my last post.

The backpedalling continues!

Please keep going. Like I said, I honestly see it as a good thing.

But let me tell you now that nobody on earth, no matter who they are or whether they are or aren't related to you, takes any sexual advice from anyone who uses the term "hanky panky".

@SurprisedWithAHorse he is her first boyfriend she is 10000% virgin before she met him. I did give her the talk my parents didn't and look at what happened to me. Pregnant at 16 and having to choose between homelessness or abortion. I will support my daughter with whatever decision she makes as long as she's safe. She has told me she doesn't want a baby.

I said under 18 no hanky panky business over 18 they can do what they want that's what I said. Did you get on with your parents were they good to you did they feed you struggle to keep a roof over your entitled head.

What you are telling me in a serious way that I have control over who my daughter has sex with.

No, dear. I am telling you the exact opposite. You're the one determined to believe that your 19 year old daughter who lives in Wales doesn't get it on with her boyfriend because she knows you wouldn't like it. Have you followed the conversation at all?

I'm glad to see you've completely backpedalled on your earlier post, though, so it's now actually you supporting her choices. It means there's been a shift of mindset and in the cases of parents attempting to police their adult children's intimate lives, that is genuinely a very good thing.

So why have you said that everyone's got an opinion??

Mad!

Well as you know already, it’s not a dilemma and they’ll have sex whether or not she stays the night.
I assume he’s an only child and this level of stress is normal for you?

I'd find it weird if a 19 year old and his girlfriend weren't having sex to be honest. At least they are using protection.

19 year old boy has sec with his girlfriend..... just imagine!

What you are telling me in a serious way that I have control over who my daughter has sex with. She lives in Wales are you SERIOUS???

I support my child with whatever decision she makes as long as she's safe. That's all I care about.

Do you like your parents were they monsters to you the emotion in your posts are serious. I hope you look after your daughter and she doesn't become a house servant to a man.

I believe from experience, parents who allow their kids a bit more freedom tend to have better more honest relationships.

Definitely.

And she has a boyfriend. But your of-age teenager totally doesn't sleep with him because you said so. Mm hm.

Nobody cares about how mad and crazy you all are. The problem is you attempting to police legal, consensual sex that's nothing to do with you because of the weird idea that you somehow own your daughter.

He’s 19
Hes an adult
Dont go in his room
Don’t put his sex life on the internet
Don’t discuss with your friends