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XL Bully Around Children

186 replies

Popcornlassie28 · 07/11/2023 14:06

Hi,

My SIL has decided to buy a XL bully dog (yes I know they are in the process of being banned by the government).

I was bitten by a bully type dog as a child when I was round a friend’s house having a play date so I’m naturally on edge about this.

I have two small children (and she has an older school age child) and I’ve expressed I’m not comfortable with the children visiting the house with the dog there but she is welcome to visit us here.

They think I’m being OTT and said that the dog is fine and not all are aggressive. She is refusing to muzzle or put the dog away as she said it’s a pet that needs to be socialised with people and putting the dog away will add to the issue.

Seeing all the news about these dogs at the moment makes me think I’m being responsible as one bite can kill and be devastating.

I know it’s a nature verses nurture debate and people think it’s how they are raised and not their breed but I don’t know enough about this breed to comment.

Am I being unreasonable to not allow the children over?

OP posts:
oakleaffy · 11/11/2023 09:14

SayingwhatIreallythink · 11/11/2023 08:58

She won't be able to hold the bloody thing back once it's matured

This is a big problem. So often the large men of the household pick up these dogs, then expect their wife to walk it.

This.
We had a horrible incident with one because of this.
Woman utterly incapable of holding the bloody thing.
I damaged my back and tendons in my hand trying to restrain the wretched thing.

At least my little dog was able to get away because of this- {mine was on a lead and this off lead thing charged}

I am used to horses and the low centre of gravity of this monster was far harder to hold back than a 16.2 TB colt.

SayingwhatIreallythink · 11/11/2023 08:58

She won't be able to hold the bloody thing back once it's matured

This is a big problem. So often the large men of the household pick up these dogs, then expect their wife to walk it.

oakleaffy · 11/11/2023 08:26

Popcornlassie28 · 07/11/2023 14:14

@FooFighter99 Thanks! I don’t know enough about large breed dogs. The only dog I’ve lived with is a Cavalier when I was 10…the most docile little beings in the world😂

I am absolutely fuming about the XL bully. It’s a puppy. She got it discounted because of the ban. Really silly.

These XL's often turn aggressive when they reach around the age of two.
Most UK ones are massively inbred with ''Killer Kimbo'' in their background several times over {a human aggressive XL Pitbull that killed a sweet little step daughter of it's owner}
She's a complete fool in my opinion, putting her children, other adults and other dogs and cats at risk.
She won't be able to hold the bloody thing back once it's matured.

MrTiddlesTheCat · 09/11/2023 14:44

Get yourself a lovely, gentle, well-trained tiger. Then invite her and her kids round for tea.

PepeLePugh · 09/11/2023 14:42

I genuinely cannot comprehend the stupidity of people who think having dogs descended from the likes of “Most Wanted (Killer) Kimbo”, “Castros Bull” and “Unstoppable Juggernaught” are destined to be fluffy cuddle-monsters.

Greybluewhite · 09/11/2023 14:30

@hjytrjulykuyh it’s usually the same idiots who say deed not breed yet in the next breath say labradors are more likely to bite, or chihuahuas are savages as a deflection from their own breeds terrible statistics. So by that logic breed traits don’t affect bullies but they do others? Or they say all bullies are ‘softies’, so friendliness is heritable but aggression not?

Makes me want to say make your mind up, either breed makes a difference or it doesn’t. These people clearly don’t understand genetics.

hjytrjulykuyh · 09/11/2023 12:43

PepeLePugh · 08/11/2023 13:38

I don't buy the "it's not the dog it's the owner" argument.

Dogs have a job that they were bred to do and it is instinctive to them. For example, my spaniel was bred to retrieve and is obsessed with retrieving balls and sticks and will have had this instinct whether she was raised by me or by a heard of elephants. Of course, I as the owner can ensure she is trained properly to control this but it is an innate instinct to her and her breed.

In the case of the xl bully, they were bred for aggression and to kill. A "good" owner might be able to keep darling Daisy under control for a time but as far as I am concerned, they are a loaded shotgun that could go off at any moment and that is not would not be a risk that I would even begin to contemplate.

It's funny how nobody has any issue with acknowledging that sheepdogs like to herd, bloodhounds like to sniff, Jack Russells like to chase small animals, etc... until you get to bully breeds, when suddenly it's a taboo to acknowledge that they like to fight and kill other animals. The absolute stupidity of humans thinking that a dog's genetics and ancestors and bloodline have absolutely nothing to do with the likelihood of a dog killing someone. Oh no, the owners caused that to happen. Just like someone who raises a tiger from being a tiny cub must have raised it wrong for it to snap and maul them one day.

ABCXYZ17 · 08/11/2023 18:49

Do not let your children anywhere near that dog and do let your sister ever look after your children for fear that she might let the dog near them. I would not trust this at all. Even if she says the dog won’t be there / she’ll take them out without the dog do not believe her.

ilovebrie8 · 08/11/2023 18:43

These dogs make my blood run cold they are killers …I’d not go anywhere near one.

nothing would change my mind if they turn that’s it you’ve no chance…they have no place in society and should be banned.

Beggars belief anyone with kids would consider getting one they must have a death wish to do so

bombastix · 08/11/2023 18:23

It's not much comfort if you are attacked and someone says to you it's the owner.

Truthfully it's both. The dog and the owner.

MackrelSky · 08/11/2023 17:38

PepeLePugh · 08/11/2023 13:38

I don't buy the "it's not the dog it's the owner" argument.

Dogs have a job that they were bred to do and it is instinctive to them. For example, my spaniel was bred to retrieve and is obsessed with retrieving balls and sticks and will have had this instinct whether she was raised by me or by a heard of elephants. Of course, I as the owner can ensure she is trained properly to control this but it is an innate instinct to her and her breed.

In the case of the xl bully, they were bred for aggression and to kill. A "good" owner might be able to keep darling Daisy under control for a time but as far as I am concerned, they are a loaded shotgun that could go off at any moment and that is not would not be a risk that I would even begin to contemplate.

I agree.

I have a spaniel who came from a working line.

He is lovely wonderful dog and has been an easy to train in nearly every area. Apart from.. if he gets near a bird. He killed a few when he was a puppy. Once he got one in his mouth, he didn’t even know what to do with it - he just looked a bit shocked and clueless and dropped them, but they died of shock I think.

We have been able to improve his recall since then and he will come back even if a bird is nearby - but I still see his eyes light up when he sees one, and it isn’t in a good way!

That drive is just in him, nothing to do with him being malicious or the type of owners we are. He couldn’t care less about cats or killing any creatures generally (he is even scared of hamsters) but the bird urge is from his breeding.

Overcooker · 08/11/2023 17:24

Balloonhearts · 08/11/2023 17:10

I'm sure they'll take your hysterical catastrophising under advisement. 🤣

Leaving a child unattended with any breed of dog, while you sleep, is dangerous and negligent parenting.

I’d assume that anyone who is leaving their child sleep unattended with a type of dog that is being banned due to the deaths and injuries that have occurred is trying to make a point, and are willing to risk their child’s life to do so.

I can’t believe you think it’s funny.

PepeLePugh · 08/11/2023 17:12

Abouttimemum · 08/11/2023 14:11

One sleeps under the baby's cot

Fuck me some people really do deserve everything they get. Thick as mince.

This is terrifying!

One of the biggest problem with xl bully's is that they can be docile and sweet until they suddenly flip out of nowhere and attack.

Balloonhearts · 08/11/2023 17:10

I'm sure they'll take your hysterical catastrophising under advisement. 🤣

GuessItsANameChange · 08/11/2023 16:55

Balloonhearts · 08/11/2023 09:57

I'd not leave a child unsupervised with any breed of dog tbh unless they live together and I know they can be trusted. So visiting any dog I'd be hyperaware of my child and where they are.

That said, I'd judge the dog on personality, not breed. Two of my friends have XL bully's and both of them are soft as muck.

One sleeps under the baby's cot and runs to wake friend just before baby wakes for a feed. Baby doesn't even get to the crying part as dog has prewarned that she's about to wake up. He dotes on that child like an extra parent.

The other flops onto his back for belly scratches the minute he meets someone. You get sniffed, a few licks on the arm then presented with a belly to fuss and occasionally a stuffed toy. They're not dangerous dogs, either of them.

Your friends are terrible parents. Absolutely despicable.

Abouttimemum · 08/11/2023 14:11

One sleeps under the baby's cot

Fuck me some people really do deserve everything they get. Thick as mince.

Abouttimemum · 08/11/2023 14:01

I have no idea why anyone would want to buy a dog of this type when there are literally dozens and dozens of magnificent breeds to choose from. It’s asking for unnecessary trouble.

I wouldn’t be taking my kids round either.

SayingwhatIreallythink · 08/11/2023 13:54

Frequency · 08/11/2023 10:35

So, you think it is okay for a dog to be mistreated and neglected as long as it is a small dog @hjytrjulykuyh?

Ignoring the ethical issue with this, it's a very short-sighted way of looking it. Breed bans do not work. They have never worked. Fatalities caused by Pitbulls are just as high in the UK as they have ever been and the overall number of fatalities caused by dogs is rising steadily year on year.

We can ban the XL Bully cross, and we can ban the next breed or cross the "bad owners" turn their attention to, and the one after that, and the one after that. Until we start turning our attention to the other end of the lead the number of people being killed by dogs will continue to rise.

We need a bigger focus on education so that the "bad owners" stop being "bad owners". No one wants their dog to maul their family or neighbour to death. It's a lack of understanding. Coupled with tighter regulations on breeding education could finally start to reduce the number of fatalities caused by dogs. Atm, all we are doing is repeating the same mistakes and expecting a different result.

The owners of these dogs already think they know everything though, so they won’t be interested in further education. As I’ve said before, they commonly don’t even microchip them even though it’s the law, so good luck expecting them to come to training classes.
Also, a lot of the attacks happen when the dog is being looked after by family/friends, so you’d need everyone to be trained.

PepeLePugh · 08/11/2023 13:38

I don't buy the "it's not the dog it's the owner" argument.

Dogs have a job that they were bred to do and it is instinctive to them. For example, my spaniel was bred to retrieve and is obsessed with retrieving balls and sticks and will have had this instinct whether she was raised by me or by a heard of elephants. Of course, I as the owner can ensure she is trained properly to control this but it is an innate instinct to her and her breed.

In the case of the xl bully, they were bred for aggression and to kill. A "good" owner might be able to keep darling Daisy under control for a time but as far as I am concerned, they are a loaded shotgun that could go off at any moment and that is not would not be a risk that I would even begin to contemplate.

NeverTrustAPoliceman · 08/11/2023 12:58

BalloonHearts I used to know someone with a dog like that. As docile as anything, really soft, protective of the children. Slept on the nursery floor etc. Until the day it took half the younger child's face off. Rottweiler/Bully mongrel type of dog.

CeciledeVolangesdeNouveau · 08/11/2023 12:36

@frequency I think we’re in violent agreement or at least disagreeing solely on semantics. I never said people shouldn’t be taught and guided on training and treatment of dogs (and I don’t know how this would work, but breeding of dogs with violent tendencies or congenital health problems like pugs should at least be heavily regulated). Until we have the time, infrastructure and public will to do that, we should restrict the most dangerous/hazardous types of dogs. To go back to the shooting analogy, I used to shoot with an air pistol competitively and was scrupulously taught how to be safe with it. I could easily have decided one day I wanted to go and shoot everyone who had ever hurt me or something (obviously that has never occurred to me, but it does in America roughly twice a week). Would I have done more damage with my little air pistol which I had to reload every shot, or with an AR-15? Similarly, is a moody little chihuahua or terrier who decides he doesn’t like you more or less scary than a dog which weighs more than you, can drag you around and bite an actual chunk out of you, even if they think they’re just playing? These dogs are more dangerous even if you don’t take the aggression into account.

Frequency · 08/11/2023 11:28

The comparison to gun control only works if we are talking about a ban on all dogs. If we are comparing dogs to guns banning the XL Bully is like banning fully automatic rifles but still allowing unfettered access to semi-automatics.

The people who like owning fully automatics will buy a semi instead.

The people who like XL Bullies will buy or breed Mastiffs or Cane Corsos instead.

Unless we are going to ban all dog ownership for the general public we can only resolve the problem if we start looking at the people and teaching the people how to be responsible.

CeciledeVolangesdeNouveau · 08/11/2023 11:00

I think I’ve said this upthread but “it’s the owner not the dog” is similar to “it’s the person, not the gun”. It’s BECAUSE people aren’t good, responsible and sensible all the time that people get killed even by guns going off by accident (forget the deliberate shootings), so there are laws in place in this country to restrict them to the people and uses that are unlikely to result in harm to others. Same goes with dogs. I’ve never had a dog but I have a lot of experience with horses, who could very easily crush you to death, kick you in the head, bite you, cause a nasty fall etc even without meaning to. We had a lovely gentle horse who signalled affection by pushing with his head and nibbling our shoulders. That would be much more dangerous for a toddler, which is why we wouldn’t let children near him. That’s why there are laws and regulations to ensure safety precautions around horses. I also agree about the comparison with “wild” animals like big cats. Their equivalent of having an off day and making a mean remark could be tearing your arm off.

ReadtheReviews · 08/11/2023 10:49

OK sis, you sign a contract that if your dog hurts my child you pay me 50,000.
If she isn't willing to, then she knows there's a chance.

Inastatus · 08/11/2023 10:45

I can’t believe how anyone could be that stupid! Thankfully I don’t know anyone irl with this type of dog, nor have I ever seen one in my area.