Relative burned through funds and now mooching

I would contact the UK police and make them aware, just in case. Tell them your concerns, they can check if any warrants outstanding. He is for sure trying to stay under the radar.

Google him see if anything comes up. Or Facebook.

Can you perhaps reach out to the authorities in the country/town that he came to your mother from? See if they are aware of something to do with him. When you lay out what you've put into your last post with all of the stuff that has gone on up to recent times, that does make a hell of a lot of sense.

You're doing right by your mother, just in case you needed a reminder here. That's the key thing right now.

It won't be long before we see a thread 'I let friend stay as he had been abandoned by his aunt and cousin, now he won't leave'.

I'm glad things have worked out for you OP and he's moved on but keep an eye on him at all times. His friend will kick him out soon enough and he might try working his way back in with your mum again. I know you don't want to pay for shipping or go to the bother of returning his stuff but to cover yourself, box it up, have it sent to his new address and then forget about it. You know what a nasty piece of work he is, he might try to say you stole his property.

Since you already know he's a cast iron CF I'd make a list of all the stuff he's left at your DM's (with photos for larger items) before you dispose of anything. He may have taken the valuables already, but he sounds like he'd be happy to try and sue if he'd finds out it was all gone, dramatically increasing it's value of course.

@coldcallerbaiter

100% he wants to get 'in the door' to try to influence your mum. After all, how would she get him to leave other than calling the police and he probably thinks she'd never do that. Plus it is harder to say 'no' face to face than on the phone or a text, that's true enough.

Blocking his number should work. But if he's at all phone tech savvy, he'll know how (or will soon discover) how to do 'spoof' phone numbers which will allow the call to go through. If your mum doesn't have caller ID on her landline, I suggest you get her a phone that has it. And tell her not to answer calls from unknown numbers but let them go to voicemail.

We haven't had a landline in years and we're in our 60s & retired. We finally realized the only calls we got on it were telemarketers and people we didn't want to talk to anyway. You may want to consider whether your mum really needs a landline, assuming she has a mobile.

I'm in the US and we have enhanced 911 so emergency services automatically know where we are, so that wasn't a concern for us. I don't know if the UK has the same or similar.

@coldcallerbaiter - you wrote these points (in italics):

He was shocked that we did not check on his MH crisis. He said he is now absolutely fine
Good. I would have thought though that he was absolutely fine before he had his MH crisis though but that is the cynic in me showing itself.

and needs one last visit before he starts a ‘new life’.
Nope. Not going to happen. Not even if he were to be accompanied by armed guard would he be allowed to cross the threshold again.

Apparently a ‘friend’ is letting him stay at his rental property.
This is not your concern any more where he stays. He's out of your hair and should stay that way if he knows what is good for him.

She has a landline, I am not sure if I can block his number.
I think you can get a number listed as a nuisance caller or for safety reasons so you might be able to look in to this for your mother.

he understood I am the decision maker and she is now listening to me. I also told him that if he shows up, I will call the police.
Finally the penny has dropped for him. He now gets that. I seriously hope he doesn't try to pull anything like showing up and telling your mother to be quiet and not tell you about the visit.

Well done to you @coldcallerbaiter for getting this far with him and essentially remaining calm throughout. Many would have completely lost their shit at him.

@coldcallerbaiter some charities collect. Anglo doorstep collections do UK wide collections for charity. I also found leaving stuff outside a great way of disposing, always someone who will take stuff. I even put box's of books outside my dads they were gone within the hour.

To block a number from a landline dial *60 and follow the instructions to block either the most recent number or a specific number.

He wants to get in the house and confront your mum to make her back down, he can't do that on the phone. Yes you can block number on landline.
Also as he has the use of a single person dwelling [free rental] now is the time to have his stuff delivered to him, then he has no connection at all to your mums house. Ask for the address....if indeed there is one. If no longer paying hmo he can pay storage. It's gone on long enough x

@coldcallerbaiter

This is from his antics about the loan and the resulting 'Christmas-now-permanent ban'?

I think not feeding his fire by not replying is the right thing to do. But I'd be concerned that he's realizing that your mum isn't caving to his 'absence' and will start to contact her to worm his way back. Is there any way you can block his number on her phone, if she wouldn't object to it.

It's so difficult when our parents age and some of their natural suspicion begins to erode. I went to my mum's house once to find her 'entertaining' complete strangers because they said they were "friends of your son". Mum didn't know them from Adam. My brother later said they were 'a bit dodgy' acquaintances. In her more 'cognizant' days she'd never have let them in, no matter who they said they were.

So glad your mum has you to keep an eye on her. As my gran used to say "You're earning jewels in your Heavenly crown".

@Xenia this isn't the thread for benefits bashing. Those people who 'haven't done a day's work in their life' but have been able to claim benefits for 40+ years before reaching pension age will have had to have justifiable reasons to do so, usually being medically unfit to work and/or whilst raising children, while living in the UK.
None of which are relevant to the OP's post.

Yes, that's my understanding too. There's a sliding scale, so those who are justified benefits claimants receive more, and those who haven't paid in get less - ie, what was income support and possibly housing benefit for a single room in a shared house. They would receive the equivalent of job seekers allowance after 3 months of actively seeking work. That's why moocher needs to sign on and look for work, if he wants anything above a paultry existance, which isn't generous at all. No wonder he's trying to spunk off OP's mum, to avoid having to go work in a warehouse!

I don't know about the work abroad and your universal credit/pension credit and housing benefit, but I think if you never do a day's work in your life and don't own a property, never paid NI etc then you can end up with more than the £12k a year or whatever sate pension is because your rent alone is likely to be more than that.
"Yes, you can receive Pension Credit if you don't have a State Pension:

Eligibility
You might be eligible for Pension Credit if your income is less than:

• £218.15 per week if you're single" (£11,336)

"If you get Pension Credit you can also get other help, such as: Housing Benefit if you rent the property you live in."
So the person who has worked full time like a dog since they were 16 gets £12k a year state pension and as they may own their own flat gets no help on that front and the person who has claimed benefits all their life and never worked gets that 11 336 plus a lot of help with rent , perhaps as much again.

OP, would you give your mum's solicitor the heads up that this grifter is hovering around, so that they are aware?

@Xenia that isn't true. If you are here but haven't worked - eg been in receipt of benefits long term - you're benefits claim 'contributes' for you. It's one reason why people who are unemployed but not planning on claiming (eg if they have savings) are still encouraged to submit a claim even if they won't be due anything.

Living abroad and then coming back to claim is very different. My late step dad and his mates had similar issues at they'd all lived and worked in the UK but often cash in hand and certainly never paying their 'stamps' (self employed in the trades) and they were all screwed when it came to pension age.

@coldcallerbaiter my DGM was widowed in the war in the 1940's, she was left at home with her teen aged DDs and very shortly after a male relative turned up, he wasn't married and was becoming elderly and he moved in, with my DGMs grudging agreement, and lived with them until my DGM got him into an old folks home(as they were called then). He thought she needed a man about the house but all he wanted was a roof, a bed and someone to do his washing and cooking.
My DGM and your DM's are a tale as old as time. As her DD you'd do housework and help your DM, your moocher relative just wants a free ride

On pension, if he is a UK citizen with right to live here but not paid the 35 years of NI to get a state pension, then I believe he would get housing benefit and pension credit/universal credit ie our awful system gives people who never do a day's work in their lives more than pensioners who have worked full time without a break for 40 years.

He has been out of uk most his life so no he wont have paid in 35 years of national insurance so wont have any uk pension rights. I have friends in France who have never paid in but assumed/expected a pension as uk citizens, you can imagine their shock. He should by now be entitled to universal credit as he has been resident for a year, I believe you are entitled after 3 months back in uk, of course they will check his financial situation and if he has savings he will not be entitled, I am guessing this is why he hasnt claimed. If he isnt working he must have savings to be paying HMO rent unless your mum is paying it or he is claiming but denying it to get acess to mums money. Tbh I wouldnt believe anything he says unless proved.