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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

… to be mad at ill colleague?

133 replies

Rewindthefilm · 01/11/2023 16:13

A colleague who ALWAYS comes in to work even when badly ill only to moan about being ill and touches every work surface going and leaves their food and drink all over the place insisted on being in work before half term started for all of us. I was sympathetic but kept my distance. However I have clearly ended up catching their horrible cold and it is wrecking my half term- I have had to cancel a few plans with friends because I don’t feel great and don’t want to risk them catching anything and I’m lacking the focus to even sit and read at home. So it feels like half a week wasted already. On top of this, I’m pregnant and having spoken to a pharmacist and midwife, there’s loads of cough medicines I can’t have. The colleague doesn’t know I’m pregnant as I haven’t said, but surely that’s not the only reason you should be mindful of others when ill, right?

I feel like I’ve been robbed of my downtime because my colleague was selfish. They have a martyr complex that many others have noted- definitely isn’t the first time they have come in when quite ill, complained about how bad they’ve felt and then been oblivious to how germs spread by not cleaning up after themselves or observing personal space.

Of course I won’t go into work next week and accuse them of ruining half term or be unprofessional towards them but AIBU for feeling mad towards them right now?

OP posts:
WhateverMate · 01/11/2023 16:41

There are colds flying around left right and centre at the moment, just as there always is at this time of year.

You haven't mentioned whether the colleague could have worked from home though? This is very relevant.

zelda10 · 01/11/2023 16:38

YANBU! Nothing worse than the work martyrs who brag about never having had a sick day whilst coughing and infecting everyone with their germs. Just stay at bloody home! I’m currently in bed with Covid thanks to one of these selfish fuckers.

Flamingogirl08 · 01/11/2023 16:36

I sympathise but I suppose it depends on the sickness policy where you work.

If you just get SSP maybe your colleague can't afford that. Or if you get full pay but face disciplinary action after a certain point then maybe they're afraid of consequences.

I'm lucky that I can work from home if I have a cold etc however if I couldn't then I wouldnt be able to take sick leave every time I have the sniffles because I'd probably lose my job eventually.

Guiltyfeethavegotnorhythm0 · 01/11/2023 16:30

You're pregnant and have a cold 🤷🏻‍♀️.

Fionaville · 01/11/2023 16:29

YANBU I hate people speading their sickness germs. But I also remember working in an office, where the bosses would all come in when they were sick and sick days were completely frowned upon. I remember sitting there with a horrific cold once, filling my paper bin to the top with tissues, I looked and felt like death warmed up. I'd said to my boss that I'd just get my urgent work done, which would take an hour, then I'd go home. And she said "No you won't, we need you in" I felt bad that my colleagues might catch it, but I just had to plough through.

coconutpie · 01/11/2023 16:27

By the way, the fact that you are pregnant is irrelevant - this colleague should not be attending the workplace if they are that unwell and spreading their germs everywhere.

coconutpie · 01/11/2023 16:27

YANBU and as this is a regular occurrence with said colleague, you should raise it with HR. HR should be sending a notice out regarding people attending the office while ill. Have we learned nothing from covid?!!

Outandontheotherside · 01/11/2023 16:22

YANBU and it is annoying when people do this. But she can't be responsible for not knowing about your pregnancy when you haven't told her.

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