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AIBU?

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Original poster

To say they can’t visit with their dog?

134 replies

blutterfly · 26/09/2023 06:02

We live 4hrs from my parents. We have two primary aged children. We hardly see them anyway but they’ve recently got a puppy. A bouncy thing. We have an old and very nervous cat, who hides most days under the bed when we have visitors.

We have visited them since puppy arrived. DM has asked if they can visit us and bring puppy. I’ve said no it’s not fair on our cat. As far as I see it, it was their choice to get a dog not ours. They should get a pet sitter so they can visit. They’ve never had a dog before and always been cat people, so this is new way of life for them.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Sheeponacid · 26/09/2023 06:20

Yab massively u to deny your primary aged kids the chance to spend time with a puppy - mine would never forgive me! There are plenty of ways to work around this, as pp have suggested.

lightinthebox · 26/09/2023 06:18

I think it’s unfair to fixate on the dog. If it’s nervous around visitors maybe ban visitors too?

Just shut the door and keep the puppy downstairs. Go all the way if it’s really about caring about your cats welfare and ban any visitors.

billsbear · 26/09/2023 06:16

I think you are being unreasonable given its family and they’re travelling 4 hours to visit you. You can easily work around the cat/puppy situation - both can have designated rooms.

MidnightOnceMore · 26/09/2023 06:13

I think it's fine to say no. It's your house.

This is the reality of having a dog, they are not able to go everywhere.

smallshinybutton · 26/09/2023 06:12

There's a lot of dog threads recently!

Anyway, no OP you are not unreasonable- if you don't want a dog in your house then why should you.

rosie1959 · 26/09/2023 06:11

As you say the cat is nervous of visitors and hides under the bed so as long as you keep the puppy downstairs I can’t see a problem. As the cat is wary of human visitors I presume you don’t keep them away as well.
My daughter also has a cat that will make himself scarce if visitors arrive but she also has a very large bouncy dog but the elderly cat put him in his place from day one.
is the puppy the problem and the cat just a convenient excuse?

MintJulia · 26/09/2023 06:10

YABU. They don't have to visit you at all.

There are several ways to manage this. It isn't too difficult. My dsis has a nervous elderly cat. When I took young DS to visit, the cat would retreat to dsis' bedroom until we left. DS wasn't allowed in.

When dnephew visited with his dog, the puppy crate stayed in the back of his estate car. The back door left open, and dog had his water bowl, toys and blankets in his puppy crate in his familiar car on a warm night, and stayed outside. Dnephew brought him in to the conservatory each day.

Their dog is still a puppy. Give them time to get it settled and in a routine, and then suggest a compromise.

yogasaurus · 26/09/2023 06:04

Yanbu. Just say no.

Hersecretserviceyourmaj · 26/09/2023 06:04

And today's dog thread is....