Dating a man who is obsessed with his child

I'd want a conversation with my partner to span a range of topics. If he kept bringing it back to just ONE thing, I'd get quite annoyed too.

It sounds like maybe he hasn't got anything else to say or is so focused on his child there's no room for you. (Or, like a lot of blokes, these days, just needs to dominate the whole conversation.)

Either way, I don't think this is the man for you.

I agree. If someone wants to make their child their "whole world" (not healthy for either the parent or the child) then why bother dating someone? I would back off OP.

don't do it

Agree.
You can love/ adore/ prioritise your child, but it doesn’t mean you have to talk about them all the damn time.
OP- you want someone with more conversational skills. This guy doesn’t sound like he cuts the mustard here

I hear you, OP. I once dated a lovely bloke but never shut up about his kids. It’s so boring when it’s the only topic of conversation.

I agree that isn’t some amazing ‘green flag’ - it’s a sign of poor social skills and a lack of self awareness.

I’ve dated guys who regularly talk about their kids, but it isn’t constant and they have other interests.

God this guy sounds boring. Stop dating him?

If you have a life that revolves around your child and not much more then that will always be a talking point. But if you create more memories with him then there may be more conversation about you and him and other experiences. It’s hard to be a parent without other things going on to all of a sudden be in a situation with other things going on, if that makes sense. His world may have been very closed, and now he is trying to make it a bit bigger.

Just switch the subject. If he can't because he's got nothing else in the locker, then that's what he's all about.
On you now to decide if you want to date him further.
If it's not for you, move on.
If you do, you can't then complain about it.

He's just boring. If it wasn't the kid it could be going on about any other topic, fishing or cycling spring to mind, without looking to see if you're interested.

TOTALLY! 🙄

@Honeybu I’m obsessed with my child. I’m a lone parent and they are everything to me.

Do I talk about them on dates? Yes.

Do I make sure I only talk about them a small percentage of the time so that, you know, I can date? Yes.

He clearly can’t date and lacks the skills to form a relationship in my opinion!

Move on and meet someone who has no baggage!

Agreed.

And I have two of the fuckers.

How far into the date does he start talking about his son ?
Doesn't he have any other interests ?
Have you tried ingnoring what he says and start talking about something totally different

The only people actually interested are the other parent and possibly grandparents.

How is you and your H boring on about your own shared kids remotely the same as this?! 😂

Totally missing the point…..🙈

Can you not just say to him 'Right. Enough about our children for tonight. Let's talk about ourselves and get to know each other a bit more. Tell me about.......'

Yes. I don’t understand how anyone can misunderstand your post, OP. All the crap they write about putting your children first, whilst wearing halos, no doubt. Many posters on here, however, are realistic.
Most parents enjoy some child free downtime. Although I assume his son lives with his mum? He’s probably not ready for a relationship. If you’re not sure and you carry on seeing him, PLEASE do not agree to meeting his son.
I think it’s a red flag -like people who are always talking about their exes.

Of course we put our children first. That’s not what the OP is talking about. She is saying he has no perspective and is not self-aware. No-one wants to listen to someone who incessantly talks about their work/hobby/child/political views etc etc.

Our children should be our number one priory, but how healthy is it to be obsessed with them?

How does it make sense that he will be a wonderful partner to another woman when the issue is he can only talk about his child? What about the woman’s needs, what about the woman’s child from past relationship?

A relationship should require a lot more than talking about one single topic.

You do realize that people like this will bring literally any discussion back to his child? He will cut you off if you try to talk about anything else just so he can continue taking about his child, pease tell me how that is a wonderful relationship for anyone?

And such behaviour is to overcompensate for other failings and/or guilt. It’s not right or normal.

You've missed the point by several miles, I'm afraid...

I understand where you are coming from. My son is my sunshine, but I wouldnt talk about him incessantly (even though I happily could).

It might be that he’s nervous and doesn’t know what else to talk about. Or because of parenting he might just not have had time in recent years to cultivate different interests. It’s hard to know.

Does he ask you about your children and have an interest in you and your life or can he literally bring everything back to his son? If so, you might have to move on….

You're right - it'd be much better if he didn't give a shit!