Help me do this pl - splitting holiday villa costs

Id stick with the Villa, but make sure to say that meals out, shopping should be split fairly.

Otherwise you will be subsidising them all week

If you haven't already sent that, don't. Suggesting that division by three is complicated just makes you sound a bit bonkers plus, as people have said, going to a hotel will be much more expensive - and it sounds as if the villa she's found is lovely. I think it's better so say that the three way split isn't really fair and suggest a fairer split that recognises that the children's rooms are inferior to the others.

Do you all get our own bathroom?
If you are all paying the 1000, you should have your own bathroom if that is possible.

Sorry I had missed this and kept asking when you'd already answered

How about $500 per double room with ensuite, $300 per room without ensuite, plus another $100 per person?

Bedroom 1 - DH & I $700
Bedroom 2 - Best Friend and her DH $700
Bedroom 3 - Friend's teenaged kids (2) $500
Bedroom 4 - Friend's BIL & his DP $700
Bedroom 5 - Friend's BIL's adult child $400

As there will be 5 rooms, the fairest split is by fifths, so:

£600 OP and DH
£1200 Friend, her DH and 2 kids
£1200 BIL, his partner and their child

Bills could also be split by fifths as this is proportionate. If you want to alleviate a small amount of the cost, you could treat everybody to an activity or pay the whole bill for one meal. If friend is a true friend, she will be on board with this.

Glad you messaged but considering someone put the effort into finding a really nice villa, not sure they will go for a hotel. It will be thousands more as you'll need to eat out all the time too.

I think you should have just said, how about adults count for 1 and kids for half? And sent revised costs.

I could suck to the accommodation but would not be prepared to split food and other stuff 3 ways.

I would say "happy to pay 1/3 for the villa cost but just want to check we won't be splitting all other costs in three given there's only two of us?".

I'm waiting for her to reply "No need for a calculator, dividing by 3 is easy enough 😄😙"

Glad you've messaged her before things got out of hand.

As the adults will get the nicer rooms I'd go with 3 way split. However this could be great springboard to say, "even though there is just 2 of us we are happy to pay 1/3 of villa, but can all other costs once we are there be per person?" You can do a kitty or pre load a credit card based on per person input . Teenagers eat and drink a lot , as much if not more than adults.

What are the other two rooms, then? Doubles without ensuite?

Agree, half board is a much better option. No resentment as everyone has prepaid for their families.

Please let us know her response!

I think it's unfair. I'd probably suck it up but if you don't say anything, I'd worry that everything will be split 3 ways.

I think you should make generous offer so that they pay a bit more, just so they know that it's not going to be a constant threeway divide. I also think you're going to resent every payment on holiday if you don't say something. If you know them all really well, just say you think it's a bit unfair to split three ways. Children, let alone teenage/ adult children, with their own rooms are NEVER free on any holiday. I have 3, I should know! Even when we dump one, holidays become massively cheaper.

Your last post @captainmarvella sounds good, hopefully they'll see the sensibility of this.
As an aside, I often notice from threads here that the ones so keen to split bills whether for restaurant or holidays are the ones looking to be subsided!

Why should DH be allowed to set precedents for OP’s interactions with her friend?

Surely you pay for you and dh can subsidise whoever he wants to? He can use his personal funds for that. He wants to appear minted then let him. You don't want to be a mug. That's also fab! Or she isn't your friend if she let's you pay for her family..

Do any of the rooms have en suite bathrooms while the others would be shared bathrooms? That would be a factor.

All rooms being equal (which I doubt they are) I would split half the cost by room and half by person. So $166 per person plus $300 per room. That means the couples pay $632, the family of 4 (with 2 teenagers) pays $1264, and the adult child pays $466 - although their parents might choose to subsidise them.

I haven't read the full thread yet so this might have already been said, but OP I am shocked that you are hoping for the master suite when you are neither the person celebrating a big life event, or the person doing the organising! This is swayed me massively from thinking it's a difficult situation, to you are tight and cheeky.

I think the suggestions of a split more like £750, £1125, £1125 is fairer than splitting evenly per bedroom or splitting three ways - but you can absolutely not go on this holiday expecting pick of the best!!!!

Whether you suck it up on the villa or not, you need to mention other costs now before they start planning.

I would talk to your friend and just agree costs for everyone to make sure it's fair. Otherwise you're going to be worried about it for the next year and getting more and more worked up.

I think you split by number of bedrooms. Children/non earning guests are the responsibility of the parents. I'm a parent btw and this is how we do it!

Four ways:

Split 1:
Bedroom 1 - DH & I

Split 2:
Bedroom 2 - Best Friend and her DH
Bedroom 3 - Friend's teenaged kids (2)

Split 3:
Bedroom 4 - Friend's BIL & his DP

Split 4:
Bedroom 5 - Friend's BIL's adult child (an adult - should pay)

*Split 2 is being mildly generous to the family with the kids but I think fair.

That's how I'd want it if it were me..

I’d split the cost of the villa 3 ways but ensure that the food is split more evenly