All old people should sell up family homes for families.

@queenofthewild so true re bungalows. They seem to be the most popular choice for younger people looking to 'add value' (I include my own neices/nephews in this). Moved from perfectly adequate and lovely family houses to bungalow ripe for redevelopment. Huge family kitchen/dining/living extension out the back, expand into the upstairs space with master-en-suite.

Ridiculous mortgages, of course, but pricing the 'old' people out of the market.

I don’t agree with this at all. House prices compared to salary are extortionate these days and so many younger people, including families, can’t afford to buy a property at all. I know they haven’t lived through any wars but the housing market is far harder for younger people. And those I know certainly aren’t asking for anything on a plate - they’re often going without, month after month, so they can save a big enough deposit for a house.

In my area young families who desperately need an extra bedroom often can’t afford to buy a larger house because the prices have been pushed up by older people and Londoners moving to ‘the country’. Nurses, teachers, supermarket workers (key workers basically) simply can’t compete.

For this reason, all the new builds in my area in the last few years have been 5-bed houses costing over £800k. They build small developments to sidestep the requirement for a proportion being set aside as affordable housing. The result is that there IS no affordable housing here for families trying to buy a standard family home. This isn’t older people wanting to stay in their family home - this is older couples buying a new 5-bed house just because they can.

Obviously you can’t force people out of their homes but I do think there should be council tax incentives for people to move out of homes that are disproportionately large for their needs.

Let me guess they should also sell the property for the price they paid so it's affordable too...?

What a ridiculous post. Why should anyone be forced from their homes. Those families most likely can not even afford a large home so why make older generations move.

It is weird that my mum was pretty much given her home by the council - had 3 kids young, then bought it at a cheap price. She is now rattling around in there on her own whereas we are in a 2 bed flat cramped in as a family of four. It is arse about face. Maybe I shouldn't have had kids, but you know, nobody told me how difficult housing would be now as nobody has a crystal ball!

I don't think they should give up their homes, they need to be incentivised to sell up and have better retirement properties which don't fleece you on ground rent etc. The fact that homes are seen as an investment which increases in value has meant people have hung onto them when they don't need them. If we didn't have such a huge wealth divide between old and young we wouldn't have this mess. We need to incentivise selling or build more family homes.

They only build small retirement/investor properties old, holiday lets or profession sharer properties In my area. So basically high rise flats. None of these are built for families, have no parking or outside space or storage, small rooms too. This is because they only build on brownfield sites in densely populated towns and don't create new towns anymore, so the properties are shit to live in as a family. Another annoying thing they do is build massive 4 beds, so no starter homes for families either.

I am 71 my OH is 75. I work part time, so I spend half my day working and the other half is usually looking after a GC. Every spare minute I have I am out in the garden. We have discussed moving from our 3 bed semi but decided to stay. He is outside building a new fish pond as I write this so we are still very active. We have the luxury of a bedroom each and room to be apart when we need it with a spare room for GC. I am sorry but a retirement community is my idea of hell!!

I am a much younger 71 year old than my mother was at this age, I know I will deteriorate but I am not prepared to give up my house until the very end. I would rather have the space to move a carer in than go to a care home, in fact I have a Plan B in case of serious deterioration that involves a very cold night and a bottle of whisky. I saw my mother's time in a dementia ward and it was horrible.

Finally what youngsters forget is that it isn't until you retire that you make more use of the space you have because you are in it all day instead of going to work etc. I really don't want to move in a bungalow and never have the space to be alone, much as I love my OH. My modest 3 bed semi would only get us a tiny bungalow at best, and I would feel trapped.

Best post on here!!! 💓

And it gives me great pleasure to tell all the ageist hard of thinking posters on this thread that I live in a very large 4 bedroom townhouse. All.By.Myself.

So you can all fuck off.

Good Lord! The ageism indicated in the language of this post!

Older people are “they”. And “we” can’t force them to do what “we” know “they” should do. As if older people are not the same sort of human being that you are.

You wait, @WeightInLine you’ll be old inevitably. The alternative is worse.

Good luck getting me out of my 4 bed detached.

Retirement flats are plentiful in our area, but the ground rent and maintenance costs would soon eat into the small amount she would receive when selling her house, assuming there is anything left over from sales and moving costs.

Plenty in our area too but if we had to move into a flat I’d rather one in the waterfront area with a sea view.

Thanks for letting me know I'm old😁. Both working and renovating the house. Finally we have a house we always wanted ...a big enough place for our 3 adult children and extended family to stay whenever they want ( and boy are we busy ! ) ..a quick.look on local house search shows lots of 4 bed plus houses. There is no housing shortage round here and prices are ' affordable ' because we're not close enough to cities or transpor The problem is job distribution ...its London and city centric .

Well @benigogo you know the idea is unreasonable. YABU but it’s an interesting question in terms of asking those who really do think in this ageist and intolerant way to put their ideas on the line.

Let’s start with social housing. If you are lucky enough to have a Council house for your family, hugely subsidised by the rest of us, why should you hang onto it when your DC have left home for independent life?

Cue howls of “Oh no, it’s my family hooooome”.

If it’s not appropriate to require Council tenants to downsize, why would it be any more reasonable to require owners to downsize?

Your OP emphasises how ridiculous the idea is.

When people on these threads say about older people downsizing they don't generally mean that want they take up a nice little 2 or 3 bed house that a younger person might want, what they really mean is they want them to go into a flat out of the way.

@ArcaneWireless

What happens though if a parent has dementia and you uproot them from something (one of the only things?) that is 100% familiar?

Excellent and very valid post. My MIL is in the early stages of dementia and she only "functions" because of muscle memory really - she can do everything she needs without thinking about it, i.e. making meals, laundry, cleaning, shopping, etc., but she's completely hopeless when she has to think or something changes because she's incapable of it! The local newsagents closed a couple of years ago due to covid and she's never got to grips with going to the alternative one in the other direction - still wanders down and gets confused when she sees it's closed and thinks she'll go the next day when it's open again (despite it being obviously empty and derelict!).

We've taken her on holidays with us for around 10 years - yes, she's been confused, but she just tagged along with us, and was fine. Last year we took her on a short UK break, first time in 3 years due to covid, and she was a nightmare. Couldn't settle at all, prowling around all night, just couldn't understand it was a holiday home (we'd been to plenty together), thought it was our new house or that we'd sold her house and moved - literally minutes after we told her it was a holiday home, she'd ask again where she was and why we'd moved. She started getting argumentative and aggressive (she's usually always very passive). We came home early and won't be taking her anywhere again. Thing is as soon as she got through her front door, she was fine, went to put the kettle on, couldn't understand why she had a suitcase as she'd already forgotten she'd been away!

It's really better for people in that state to be left where they are for as long as they can muddle on in their own little world.

Bit much if you bought your home, but I do agree with people in council houses downsizing. When I worked with vulnerable families, they had to wait so long to get housing with more than one bedroom, yet lots of pensioners were swanning about in 3 bed houses, that does not seem quite fair.

Larger houses can be adapted and have gardens. Family can stay too.
Mum moved to a 5 bed so we can stay (we're there almost every month) and she can live fully on the ground floor when the time comes.

It would be better to build more houses.

My parents will never move from their 4/5 bedroom house until they have to.

• they built it themselves, it’s our family home and they love it
• they want some spare rooms for when family come to visit
• they have tons and tons of stuff 🙄 that they have no intention of getting rid of
• they have hobbies that need room (mum mum has a sewing room, my dad has a billion stamps / albums etc)
• they prefer to sleep in separate rooms now anyway

it does irritate me slightly when they moan about not having enough space (we are a family of four living in a two-bed apartment) or when we visit and can’t put anything away as every cupboard/ drawer is stuffed full with ‘stuff’. But it’s very much their house to do with as they want.

My mother lives alone in a 4 bedroom house. I think she Woolf happily downsize, but it just isn't possible for her. Her house is in good condition and decorated to her tastes.

Bungalows that come on the market are more expensive than her current house and often very run down. She is in no position to take out a loan or mortgage.

Retirement flats are plentiful in our area, but the ground rent and maintenance costs would soon eat into the small amount she would receive when selling her house, assuming there is anything left over from sales and moving costs.

Older people need incentivising to move, but because of the shortage of suitable properties they are too expensive.

PILs downsized to what seemed like the perfect place, a new bungalow on a quiet cul-de-sac, looking out onto fields , sheep, cows... But it was 2 hours drive from family, and on the outskirts of a small village, 1mile walk to the shops. As they became very elderly MILs dementia meant she couldn't find her way around the kitchen, and didn't know how to find her way back home if out. FIL couldn't manage the walk to town, they had to give up their car. They became socially isolated. The beautiful view and rural setting doesn't offer much company.

The same thing happened to my mother who never downsized but it may have benefitted her to do so. Her home was a detached house at the bottom of a culdesac on the outskirts of the city. It was fine as long as she was able to drive, but when she gave up she became isolated. She also lost the confidence to use public transport even though there was a bus stop not far from the house. I do think it might have slowed her decline i to dementia had she just moved into the village down the road but she would never consider it, among other things she was terrified of loss of privacy.

our three bed semi is an easy few minutes’ walk to a busy street with shops, pubs, coffee shops and public transport links and will be great for when we get old and can no longer drive.

My mother just sold her large 3 bed semi, 100ft long garden. She’s on her own, not really feeling her age, but after an unexpected stay in hospital, she decided it was just too much for her. I’m glad I didn’t have to make the decision for her. She’s bought a tiny 2 bed. I think it was the right thing to do, it was a big family house, but she worked into her 70s and no way should she have been made to sell up.

Incentives have been lightly discussed at points - mostly a stamp duty holiday/exemption for people over a certain age downsizing

There is probably also a lever that can be pulled with IHT if there was any political will

But generally it is unpopular with older voters because as has been seen on the thread, there is a hysterical knee jerk worst case scenario reaction

You can't force them to downsize, but I do think there should be incentives to encourage and help them. For a lot, it's the sheer stress of finding a property, dealing with estate agents and solicitors and removal firms, then dealing with transferring utilities, and then having to do work such as redecorating etc., so it's not just about money, in fact it's probably not about money at all. I remember my own mother not even wanting to have new carpets or decorators in her home because she'd have to move all her "stuff", empty drawers, etc and she simply couldn't face it. Hell, we're only 58 and we've already said we're never moving again because we can't face the stress and hassle of it, so we'll be carried out in wooden boxes! I have no idea what kind of help/incentive could be offered, but maybe "one stop shop" type of personal assistant support who'd deal with all the formalities, organising things, etc., may be a good start.

We could turn into a communist dictatorship and ensure everyone is housed in a home exactly suited to their current needs. And moved as their needs change. But for all its faults, I prefer the freer society we actually live in.

What we really need is affordable homes for young couples and single people so they can get into the housing market earlier. And where I live they are being built everywhere - huge high rise blocks, though it seems to be families moving in, sadly.

Inevitably a proportion of older people will live in homes too large for them, but they won't live forever, so eventually a family will benefit. My parent still lives in the family home. It could be sold and pulled down to make way for several smaller family homes and perhaps will in a few years time. Meanwhile, why should they lose their home of over 50 years?

Aye. Me too @OwlBlossom