To find it upsetting how differently I’m treated with weight on me

Are we not in a food scarcity?
Tell that to the parents that cry to me about not being able to feed their children.

Also, what do you mean by "health"? Mental health? Gut health? Because I get the impression you mean a flat stomach. And what makes you the Queen of Health? How do you know and I mean really know about someone's health by looking at them?

You don't like body fat. Admit it and go away.

What I find really interesting is how much people are prepared to justify their bias as understandable and not something that they should make efforts to overcome (as we are supposed to do with other biases). Being fat is apparently an acceptable reason for treating someone badly and you aren’t considered a bad person for doing it, if anything, you’re doing a good thing because you think you’re encouraging them to do the decent thing and lose weight (you aren’t).

Wow, this is ground breaking..such insight

I do actually have blonde hair, blue eyes and a pretty and slim face. Always have even when fat. I always make an effort with my appearance so it must all make a difference!

It could be you’re oblivious to it, I think judging by a few of the posts here some people who claim they haven’t been treated differently just haven’t noticed OR perhaps you have some of what society sees as redeeming features to “compensate” eg. Blond hair, blue eyes, conventionally attractive face, perfect smile, hourglass shape, immaculate outer presentation /grooming etc., slim face.

It’s sadly true from my experience. I have gone from around a 22 to an 8 and have noticed more looks from men, had comments from strangers calling me tiny rather than big and a whole lot worse.

@Cocktopus I agree with this. I think people can see being overweight as lazy, no self control etc which isn't always the case. Love the username by the way!

It is clear that people do this. Most employers are not looking to date you but you are more likely to get better jobs if you are attractive.

It isn't simple if your weight gain has little to do with 'calories in' and you can't exercise.

But people don't know that when they look at you. They just think fat = lazy, greedy, unhealthy, and so on. And that you could do something about it if you wanted to.

Quite. It's a curious justification isn't it.

Again, the thread isn't about attraction. It's about bad treatment. Or do you treat everyone badly that you don't find attractive?

Evolution isn’t all about genes. It’s about the environment. We aren’t in food scarcity right now so we wouldn’t find obese attractive. It’s a sign of over nutrition.

Actually, science simply says it’s calories in vs calories out. Exercise is good for you but it’s not going to contribute to much weight loss unless you keep the calories down. High fibre, high protein (to keep you full) and healthy fats for flavour and drinking water. It IS simple (objectively)

@Madamebutterfly97 you're saying people are hardwired to find health attractive; the OP isn't talking about finding a partner. She's saying everyone treats her differently and even her parents change their attitude to her based on her weight. What does that have to do with attraction?

It’s absolutely not unreasonable for you to feel hurt by this, especially if you’re aware of your potential and you know you’re naturally beautiful. It may be unfortunate but it’s true, humans are hardwired to find health attractive. If you’re underweight, gaining healthy fat/muscle will make you more attractive and visa Vera. Please don’t take it personally as I’ve experienced the same. If you want to loose weight, please only do it for yourself because at the end of the day, someone’s always going to find a fault no matter what. In regards to your health issue, don’t be afraid to speak to the doctor about what you can do differently to help shed the pounds if that’s what you really wanna do xx

I don't think that's her argument! Her point is that it's not hardwired into humans to be cruel to fat people as some kind of evolutionary instinct.

Firstly, that's not how evolution works. The poster @Letsgetouttahere2023 who claimed that treating fat people badly is an inevitable consequence of evolution has made an utterly idiotic claim there.

The rebuttal made by @EscapeRoomToTheSun is challenging the statement that @Letsgetouttahere2023 made by saying no, there isn't a primitive instinct within human beings to be unkind to fat people. There have been periods and cultures in which fat has been viewed as more desirable.

No one is claiming that being overweight is healthy here. The topic being discussed is bad treatment of overweight people. You have to be a bit dim to suggest that treating overweight people badly is 'evolution in action'. It's very dangerous ground to say that prejudice against groups of people is hardwired in, inevitable and therefore can't be challenged. For one thing, if it was truly the case that evolution meant we felt compelled to shun or be cruel to unhealthy people then where does this leave our sick, disabled and elderly in society? Now, those groups absolutely face prejudice and cruelty but let's not argue that they deserve it because of evolution.

One of the aspects of humanity that has evolved is our capacity for kindness, empathy and compassion. We aren't driven to cruelty; we have the intelligence and understanding to overcome it (not everyone, apparently!).

There is no evolutionary argument for poor treatment of fat people. It is conditioned in by societal values and standards.

Cultural values such as wealth and attractiveness don't make someone healthy 🙄

Yup, I've been a size 14 most of my secondary school years till now which was fat compared to the size 6's/8's around me. I've inherited #RBF from my mum which doesn't help.

I was always ignored.
Actually in my 20s now in my early 30s still get ignored like people can't hear me talking or I'm not there.

I've honestly never noticed anyone treating me differently and I've been between a size 8 and 16 in recent years. I'm only 5 foot 1 so a size 16 isn't good for me. Maybe I'm oblivious to it.

I find this even slightly. I've always been a healthy weight and generally slim, if I eat normally I hover between 9-10 stone. A couple of times I have had a stressful period and also got really into fitness and went down to 8 stone, I was not healthy but a lot slimmer and I got a lot more attention from men and so many compliments.

Smart enough to explain how that would work?

I became invisible recently, yes at 61, my head turning days over, a size 16, yes I could lose a bit of weight.( 5’4”)
Have bigger things to worry about, Parkinson’s, which affects me daily, and nuro eye issues ( cause unknown optically correct)
Luckily I don’t work, I would struggle if I needed to, I get by

Wow so insightful you must be a genius 🙄🤣

I think the point you made about fat-phobia being more detrimental than the actual fatness is 100% is spot on especially from the medical world I’ve only known negativity which does stop me going to the doctor, one doctor ( whilst I was suffering with anxiety from at work bullying ) telling that me that the bully didn’t like me because I was fat…really helpful not!

so your saying fat people are stupid…have a word with yourself you tit!