Page 2 | To wonder how other people afford to keep their house ‘nice’

WaspLady · 2023-07-22T08:14:57+00:00

I’m a single parent on low income, I work full time but have nothing left at the end of the month. Don’t buy myself clothes, go out or have any extravagances other than kids hobbies. I have a housing association house which is absolutely falling to bits, we are expected to be responsible for most repairs ourselves but I don’t know how it’s possible to pay for it, if I owned the house then I guess I might be willing to go not debt/ remortgage to replace the kitchen (currently 18 years old and cabinets and worktops disintegrating rapidly!) and internal doors (I think same age as the house so been there at least 35 years and only one or 2 not had some kind of repair job, several just hanging on by a thread) or have a shower installed (currently only have a bath). I go into neighbours homes and they have all put in nice kitchens, have had showers installed, replaced a lot of fittings etc, but how can anyone in a low income afford this? Where am I going wrong? I’m embarrassed to have anyone in my house and it makes me so depressed. It doesn’t matter how much I clean, paint and patch things up the house always looks awful 😞

twoandcooplease · 22/07/2023 12:15

Have you tried asking the HA for a kitchen/bathroom upgrade?
I have a council property and our bathrooms are every 15 years and kitchen every 20 (I think)
But sometimes you're past the time and they've just not allocated it to you yet and need a wee reminder

NoSquirrels · 22/07/2023 12:14

WaspLady · 22/07/2023 10:43

@S72 in reality it doesn’t work like that, they claim they don’t have the money and there is nothing that can be done. My daughter has extremely poor health and hard to manage asthma which sees her hospitalised in a regular basis, her consultant has written to the HA saying that her health issues are likely caused and exacerbated by substandard housing but they say there is nothing they can do. I hate living here, spend my whole life keeping in top of mould and damp and I know that this house is harming my children as well as my mental health but there is nothing I can do to fight it when the HA refuse to take responsibility. All the money they generate is used to build new houses which are badly needed in this area but we are paying for it with our rent and we see nothing being done to improve the conditions we live in.

Can you get your MP involved? This is a hot topic in housing right now. They need a boot up the arse and your MP is the one to do it.

DisquietintheRanks · 22/07/2023 12:11

A lot of the tips above will help but at the end of the day it does take money to keep a house in order and make things look nice.

Mumtothreegirlies · 22/07/2023 12:07

you need to take photos of the kitchen and log it as a repair and keep doing it until they send someone round.
but Yanbu I know people that have paid thousands to renovate their housing association homes, enough to have put a deposit down to buy a house and I just don’t know how they would have been eligible for the home in the first place, because when we were on a low income there wouldn’t have been money left over for a tin of paint let alone new flooring or landscapes gardening.

HikingforScenery · 22/07/2023 12:05

if it’s that bad, you need to put in a claim for
disrepair. Your daughter’s health can’t be in
jeopardy because your LL is refusing to meet his obligations.

everetting · 22/07/2023 11:53

Everyone I know with a nice house on a low income has multiple family members who help out with DIY. It's hard if you don't have that.

Mondaymanic · 22/07/2023 11:34

Lots of good advice here but the other thing I'd say is please don't be embarrassed to have people round. Some of my friends houses are mansions, some are council houses .... Some gorgeous, some (by their own admission) a tip. I don't care a bit, I think it's lovely to be invited to someone's home. People who are close to you won't be judging your house!! X

5128gap · 22/07/2023 11:32

WaspLady · 22/07/2023 09:36

One thing I really want to do is remove the horrible peeling 80s textured wallpaper in the hall but I’m fairly sure the walls would need reskimmed before I could paint. It’s things like that that put me off doing anything. I ought a new tap to replace the mouldy kitchen tap then discovered the plumbing under the sink doesn’t match any example I can find online so I wasn’t able to do it in the end.

I don’t really have any friends I can ask for help, I don’t really have any probably because I would never invite anyone to my house!

Glue down the peeling bits, paint it lovely colour and either hang pictures in a cool display or put up huge mirrors to widen the space. The paper will be far less noticeable to people than your artful display or their own reflection.

AccidentallySuckedTheStrippersDick · 22/07/2023 11:29

I'm in a council house and we get a new kitchen and bathroom every ten years as part of our regular upgrade programme. They are very basic but the quality has improved hugely compared to queen I was a child and they were plain white units with silver metal trim. Now you get a choice of 2-3 styles of door, 3 types of handles, 4 worktops, and black or white tiles.

Windowcleaning · 22/07/2023 11:29

Shelter may be able to help you submit a case to the Housing Ombudsman. There is a difference between the things that would get anyone down (disintegrating kitchen cupboards) and those which are dangerous to health (damp and mould).

Have a look at the repairs policy and see what leverage that gives you to make a formal complaint.

Ignore the balmy 'take the wallpaper off, do a quick polyfiller job and hang lining paper' posts. That's a ridiculous suggestion for a lone parent with three kids and no money.

Flipflopflopflip · 22/07/2023 11:23

bunchofboys · 22/07/2023 10:17

I knew this would be HA. Worst landlords ever.

You can thank this government for the millions of pounds of grants they have removed from HA's. I work for a HA, albeit not directly involved in the repairs and the budget cuts we are dealing with are absolutely unreal. That's not to say, of course, that some HAs, as well as councils or private landlords, are not absolute shite but the vast majority of us at our HA try our absolute bloody best on bigger all funds.

Op, honestly don't worry about what other people do in their houses, for all you know they have gotten themselves in crazy debt to do these things. Looks like lots of useful suggestions so far for small changes from PPs

S72 · 22/07/2023 11:19

*damp and mould survey not surgery. Use the formal complaint process and then escalate.

S72 · 22/07/2023 11:16

WaspLady · 22/07/2023 10:43

@S72 in reality it doesn’t work like that, they claim they don’t have the money and there is nothing that can be done. My daughter has extremely poor health and hard to manage asthma which sees her hospitalised in a regular basis, her consultant has written to the HA saying that her health issues are likely caused and exacerbated by substandard housing but they say there is nothing they can do. I hate living here, spend my whole life keeping in top of mould and damp and I know that this house is harming my children as well as my mental health but there is nothing I can do to fight it when the HA refuse to take responsibility. All the money they generate is used to build new houses which are badly needed in this area but we are paying for it with our rent and we see nothing being done to improve the conditions we live in.

Please go through the HA formal complaint process and take this to the Housing Ombudsman. Damp and mould complaints are taken extremely seriously by the Ombudsman. The HA need to take reports of damp and mould seriously, especially with a vulnerable person the household. They need to arrange a specialist damp and mould surgery to find out the cause and take action to fix it. If they don't treat it seriously, the Ombudsman will investigate.

Dagnabit · 22/07/2023 11:11

I work for a HA and you absolutely should not be doing your own repairs. Yes, they will patch up and repair, rather than replace but they are responsible for keeping it in good order. Kitchens and bathrooms aren’t usually replaced until they are 30 years old which isn’t great. If you peel wall paper and the plaster falls off, report it and get them out to re plaster.

Pugdogmom · 22/07/2023 10:58

Just to make you feel better OP, we own our house and are only now slowly getting stuff done . Our hall is depressing me, but it's last to get done as I have another room to tackle upstairs first.
Plus we need a plasterer for our hall and that's not cheap, so trying to save for that.

Filament · 22/07/2023 10:56

Definitely remove the wallpaper you hate. Even imperfect painted walls will look better. Buy some powder filler, mix it up and apply over the worst holes with a paint scraper and sand when dry. I've saved myself having to replaster many walls doing this.

MrsMarieMopps · 22/07/2023 10:55

Lendology might help? Not sure if it's just for homeowners but definitely for those on low incomes. I'm spreading the cost of my bathroom over 15 years! Fellow single parent.
Re; the walls, as a solution can you just put paintable wall paper over? Or if the wall does fall apart, ring the HA and ask them to reassess.
Also, with respect, we always focus on the stuff we don't have. They might be in shit relationships or in loads of debt!

vodkaredbullgirl · 22/07/2023 10:55

WaspLady · 22/07/2023 10:51

@MarySmit I’m sure the Victorian doors are actually made of wood though which would last a long time, they were probably good quality doors to begin with. HAs do not furnish houses with high quality sold wood fittings 🤦‍♀️

They not even standard doors either. My living room door fell off, as they only have these plastic crap hinges. The door fell on the table and there was a big dint, I've used poli filler, just needs sanding and painting.

misssunshine4040 · 22/07/2023 10:55

SchoolShenanigans · 22/07/2023 09:50

From those I know living in housing association or council houses, many are no longer on low incomes. They meet a partner who earns well, either don't declare he lives there or he doesn't declare all of his earnings, and they use the extra income for stuff like that (or in some friends situations, swanning off on expensive holidays or leasing flashy cars).

So? No one asked what people you know do. Take your judgement and stick it.
The op doesn't have a man on the side or a double income so your disgusting comment is irrelevant and clearly made to make you feel good

GillianMcQueef · 22/07/2023 10:53

MarySmit · 22/07/2023 10:48

Neither your kitchen or doors are very old. It sounds like they have been treated poorly, and this is the issue. My parents have Victorian doors and a kitchen over 40 years old. All look great. You can refresh things cheaply. For example rehanging doors and fixing any defects. Painting kitchen doors. Dressing rooms nicely with plants and rugs etc makes a huge difference, as does a lick of paint. Loads of DIY cheap and easy ideas online.

There is a huge difference between solid Victorian doors and sturdy kitchens and the cheap crap HAs use. They're designed to last a tenancy/ten years or thereabouts, after which time they're replaced. No, it's not cost effective, but that's how HAs operate.

To suggest OP has treated her home poorly is out of order.

Pugdogmom · 22/07/2023 10:53

There is a DIY on a budget group on FB, and people have posted excellent pictures of stuff they have done on very little money using B and M , Amazon, Shein etc

Original poster

WaspLady · 22/07/2023 10:51

@MarySmit I’m sure the Victorian doors are actually made of wood though which would last a long time, they were probably good quality doors to begin with. HAs do not furnish houses with high quality sold wood fittings 🤦‍♀️

OP posts:

GillianMcQueef · 22/07/2023 10:50

WaspLady · 22/07/2023 10:43

@S72 in reality it doesn’t work like that, they claim they don’t have the money and there is nothing that can be done. My daughter has extremely poor health and hard to manage asthma which sees her hospitalised in a regular basis, her consultant has written to the HA saying that her health issues are likely caused and exacerbated by substandard housing but they say there is nothing they can do. I hate living here, spend my whole life keeping in top of mould and damp and I know that this house is harming my children as well as my mental health but there is nothing I can do to fight it when the HA refuse to take responsibility. All the money they generate is used to build new houses which are badly needed in this area but we are paying for it with our rent and we see nothing being done to improve the conditions we live in.

Landlords, whether private or social, can't just abdicate responsibility for repairs by saying they can't afford it. You pay your rent for a service, which the LL is bound by law to provide. I know it's daunting (I've been there myself) but you must fight this. As a PP suggested, talk to your MP (ours was brilliant when we were in a similar situation). Call in your repairs daily if you have to and if they fall on deaf ears, seek help from the housing ombudsman. Put in a formal complaint.

Landlords cannot treat tenants in this way, there are protections in place for tenants.

CattyCattle · 22/07/2023 10:48

You need to go to Shelter OP.

MarySmit · 22/07/2023 10:48

Neither your kitchen or doors are very old. It sounds like they have been treated poorly, and this is the issue. My parents have Victorian doors and a kitchen over 40 years old. All look great. You can refresh things cheaply. For example rehanging doors and fixing any defects. Painting kitchen doors. Dressing rooms nicely with plants and rugs etc makes a huge difference, as does a lick of paint. Loads of DIY cheap and easy ideas online.