To hate how mums always have to sacrifice their career...

I'm very happy thanks.

I am just sick and tired of women implying that other women that they are shit mums becuase they aren't with their kids 24/7 based on some very strange assumptions about working parent life (interesting almost always comign from SAHMs who support their partners in their careers and allowing them to be absent parents). I would wager that my work life does not look like that which you are supporting for your "providing" husband.

Sorry if I missed it OP but what does your partner do? Why is this all on you?

OP, I could be totally wrong here, but are you possibly thinking that this receptionist job is a way to avoid being home with your kids over the summer holidays?

Dragging your kids out of bed every morning to drop them in two different childcare settings on opposite sides of town; then rushing on to work in a reception all day for no actual financial profit for the family; then off to pick them up from two different settings again... it sounds miserable. Not only for you but, far more importantly, for them. The little one is only 18 months! Why do all this when you could have a great time with them at home over the holidays? Would your children choose to be in daycare 5 days per week? No.

You seem to be pushing your view so much, it's unnecessary and I'm starting to believe you do protest just a little bit too much. If you're happy with your life, and working at your "well paying job" and your family is happy then thats all that matters! Some people are happy being stay at home mums too though!

The average job is 9-5 so assuming you commute you’re not home till 6. Then you have dinner and baths and household chores to do. Unless your baby is up till midnight you’re only going to have realistically 1 hour tops of quality 1 on 1 time with your baby.when I went back to work full time when mine were 3 I rarely saw them in the week.

Well thats your experience, it wasnt mine.
I started early and finished early and did some days wfh so no commute. Dh started late & finished late also some days wfh no commute. The kids were with a parent a lot of the time in the week.

I work. I also raise my children.

The average job is 9-5 so assuming you commute you’re not home till 6. Then you have dinner and baths and household chores to do

The working world has changed!! I work f/t and DS gets picked up at 3pm 2x a week and generally before 5 the other three days.

Lambiryani

Mums who work are still raising their kids.

HTH.

Oh and then my well paying job paid for a cleaner and allwoed us to prioritse quality time together. All SAHMs I know irl seem to spend hours cleaning for some reason!

Certainly, there are societal pressures at work to stop mothers pursuing their career.

In my case, I'm a self employed LP, struggling to put the hours in because my ex simply refuses to have the DC more than every other weekend "because I've got work and you're s/e so more flexible " 😡. Contrast this with a GP friend of mine, who still finds herself doing the bulk of the life admin, because her lower- earning s/e partner is always "busy" 😡.

However, back to the OP's case. You said you didn't want to sacrifice your career. Now, this GP receptionist job- it doesn't look like a career - type job, am I right? Low wage, little opportunity for progression? Doesn't seem that it is, pragmatically, much of a step up from the cafe job. (Plus, if you keep the cafe job, your DH gets quality time with the kids each weekend- a chance to break the pattern of you being default parent perhaps?)

It sounds like your true career would be dental nursing. If it was me, given the current scarcity, I'd be wondering if it would be feasible to take the next step up and study to be a dentist- or failing that, a hygienist perhaps? 🤔

Otherwise, have you investigated whether it would be possible to do some temporary dental nursing through an agency?

It’s clear you have a very limited experience of the workplace. Firstly a 2 hr commute a day is really high, most people are not travelling that far daily at all.
The majorly of 9-5 office based roles are now hybrid. Between myself and my DH there are 3/4 days every week when at least one of us is at home. No housework is done in the evening. Dinner and bath is quality family time to me, not something that takes away from it.
On the days I’m in the office I’m still with my toddler from 4:30 to 7:30 in the evening alone. I then work a shorter day on a Friday to spend some extra time together, time made up from a shorter lunch break so I have a shorter week and don’t lose out financially.

I wouldn't leave my kids to do a job for no money OP. What's the point if that? You'll never get the time back, but you could work in a reception anytime.

Add up your and DH’s monthly salaries. Deduct childcare costs from that. Factor in that you’re earning a pension, developing skills and engaging with adults in the workplace - just like your DH - and that your DH is also a joint parent with joint responsibility for childcare and the home. Take the GP receptionist role!

Shock 🙄

This is very age of baby dependent.

By 12 months many babies tend to just have a morning feed, a bedtime feed and maybe an expressed bottle at lunch if mum is returning to work, although many have other milk for that feed.

Its not so easy to demand feed a 3 month old and be at work.

Well I worked from home and relatively senior so could manage my own time a bit better which made it easier, but still.

Let me explain it to you as it's clearly very difficult for you to imagine anything else than this weird version of working with kids: my kids got up pretty early, 5:30 or so. We would leave for nusery or childminder around 820. Having spent 3 hrs together. I would then pick them up between 4:30 and 530 depending on my diary. They went to bed at 7:30ish, so another 3-2.5 hrs together. Out of the hours we weren't together, at least 2 would be spent napping anyway. So everyday we would have approx 6 hrs together. I then didn't work Fridays. And weekends of course. So plenty of time to coseelp and breastfeed. My two were 12 months months before I went back to work, so they really didn't need to bf more.

It really depends on your setup.

My husband and I have a flexible schedule, both can and do work from home often and work around each other and share drop offs/pick ups. Nursery is in walking distance of our home.

It's really odd that there was an identical thread from last week, with the exact same details...
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/work/4837331-which-job-would-you-choose

Did your kids never slow down on the feeds? From one, children’s primary form of nutrition is food anyway, breastfeeding is on top of that. I went back to work when my daughter was nine months; I breastfed her till she was three. Your milk doesn’t dry up because you go to work in the day.

@Mumtothreegirlies I’m a single parent and I went back to work after 8 months with both my kids. DS1 breastfed till he chose to stop at 15 months. Slept in my bed till DS2 came along when he was age 3.5. DS2 breastfed for 20 months till I weaned him off as I’d had enough by then! He also slept in my bed till he was about 4.

I expressed breast milk at work and brought it home.

There are also studies that support working too.

Working mothers benefit daughters, study says - BBC News

''It found daughters of mothers in work have better careers, higher pay and more equal relationships than those of stay-at-home mothers.
This effect was particularly pronounced in Britain and the US, the study, based on data from 24 countries, found.''

''It found no links between maternal employment and adult sons' working patterns.
However, sons of working mothers tended to "spend more time caring for family members than adult sons of stay-at-home mothers".''

Yes but mat leave is 12months in the UK, so typically by that point baby will have morning and evening feeds and probs some night feeds then food and water during your working hours.

What average job? Depends on the commute? What about the babies who get up at balls o’clock for hours of quality time before the commute even begins? Is dinner and bath not part of the quality time? You may have rarely seen your babies in the week, which is unusual and sucks for you I guess, but it’s not at all my experience of working and parenting.