To hate how mums always have to sacrifice their career...

@norestguests

If more women gravitate towards certain roles, what are you actually going to do? Tell them they are 'silly pee brains' and should be doing something else? That's just as bad as telling women they should be housewives.

Why do you think women gravitate towards certain roles?

This thread in itself is a pretty good case study for why women tend to go for certain roles. The OP has found herself in a classic "mummy track" whereby her ability to increase her income is limited by her husband's lack of willingness to support her with childcare/pickups/domestic work. By her own admission the OP would like to build up her career but feels restricted by her husband's lack of flexibility. There are millions of women who feel they can't get remunerative jobs because their husbands' careers don't allow sufficient flexibility for them to help with domestic tasks (or more commonly the husbands can't be bothered to ask for more flexibility).

As a PP pointed out, high paying roles were historically also dominated by men (that is changing but not fast enough).

Then there's the pay gap and the fact that in many industries still women are hired and promoted much more slowly than men.

Oh and many women weren't encouraged by their families to prioritise education and work, so don't believe work is "for them".

There's a massive structural disadvantage for women across society.

No one is talking about telling women to do anything but it's a demonstrable fact that women are at a massive disadvantage in their ability to earn money compared to men once they have children.

Not the genitals. But generally the associated genetics.

Like for example male athletes on the international level woiod beat comparable female athletes.

Men are biologically more career driven, physically stronger (then would be better at strenuous physical labour).

I'd be happily proven wrong

STEM is compulsory in schools and has been for some time. There is nothing stopping anyone doing STEM-related degrees or careers these days. But why do you assume STEM is necessarily better? Because it was traditionally the preserve of men? Is forcing women in to STEM (if they're not interested) any different to giving women into what we think of as traditionally female roles?

Thete was nothing stopping me doing anything.

f more women gravitate towards certain roles, what are you actually going to do? Tell them they are 'silly pee brains' and should be doing something else? That's just as bad as telling women they should be housewives.

The question you should be asking is - why do women gravitate towards particular careers?' rather than just accepting it for what it is.

More women than men are in professional careers yet more men are in senior roles....is that because men are innately more suited to leadership roles? Or sexism?

@Lambiriyani

In a marriage a man and a women are equal in terms of respect. But have different roles.

Why do they have to have different roles?

Does having a penis make you a better lawyer/doctor/firefighter/shopkeeper/undertaker? Does having a vagina make you better at putting the washing machine on? Or better at waking up in the night to do a feed? If you can point to any scientific evidence of these I'll all ears.

The issue is women don’t often have the same kind of encouragement to go into STEM just as men often don’t have the same kind of encouragement to go into childcare.

The opportunity isn’t always there, that’s the issue.

Equality of opportunity does not always need to result in equality of outcome.

If more women gravitate towards certain roles, what are you actually going to do? Tell them they are 'silly pee brains' and should be doing something else? That's just as bad as telling women they should be housewives.

I actually used STEM as an example because I work in a STEM related senior role and I’m excellent at it.

But it was made more difficult for me simply because I have a vagina. I had to work harder because I’m a woman.

Again, the very definition of sexism.

Men and women are different.
Take childbearing and breastfeeding out of the equation and tell me how are men and women different?

Ok you got me there

You don’t appear to understand sexism or sarcasm.

Exactly. Human biology and evolution.

Men and women are different.

It’s just nature! Your little lady pee brain wouldn’t understand.

But it isn’t sexist at all of course. 🙄😂

I have not RTFT but it's such a cliche to say that mums "always" have to sacrifice their careers. I took precisely three months out of my career to have my son. I thereby kept my pension in a great state and did not lose out of career progression and building my business. My DH did sacrifice his career, as it made much better economic sense for him to do so. Which one of us was which sex did not come into the calculations.

I never sacrificed my career op.

My dc are teens and adult ages now and I have a successful business that I've worked at my whole life.

I paid childminder fees and spent sleepless nights with dc and then busy days working and it was absolutely hard work but I'm so bloody glad I stuck at it and did it or I wouldn't be here now.

I also vowed I would never put myself in a precarious position where I relied on anyone else financially in case the shot ever hit the fan.

@SouthLondonMum22 It isn’t a coincidence that most teachers, especially early years are women and it also isn’t a coincidence that more men are in STEM roles

Although you aren’t wrong this is probably a terrible example to these particular posters who will no doubt think men aren’t made to teach young children and are just better at STEM. 😂 Jesus wept.

Sexism plays a part in why some careers generally are more ‘male’ or ‘female’, of course it does.

Exactly! That was a ridiculous example to use to try and say sexism doesn't exist 😂

Not in my marriage.

Same here.

Do they though? I can’t think of a single difference between my role in my marriage and my husband’s role in our marriage.
Do enlighten me?

Not my marriage.

What does that have to do with working 18 months down the line?

No one is suggesting women need to work a
week after giving birth, in fact they could take 12 months maternity plus 2 months annual leave.

After that the fact that they had a baby shouldn’t be any more relevant to the mother than the father.

Sexism plays a part in why some careers generally are more ‘male’ or ‘female’, of course it does.

It isn’t a coincidence that most teachers, especially early years are women and it also isn’t a coincidence that more men are in STEM roles.

In a marriage a man and a women are equal in terms of respect. But have different roles.

Though I feel this has been a big digression from the subject at hand.