Obviously it is possible. I know plenty of people who manage it but I don't understand how?
I won't go into long-winded explanations but the cliff notes version;
My ex (and bestfriend) died. He was the father of my kids. I know I shouldn't have but I read through his messages when I got his phone back. There were some really upsetting messages between him and our daughters.
They didn't like how our house was decorated because some areas hadn't been decorated and were still the way they were when we moved in. They didn't like how much I expected them to help out in the house. My youngest appeared to outright hate me. He would encourage them to help more since I worked 2 full-time jobs and he helped by doing the garden for me but he did agree with them that I did not do enough for them.
After that, I vowed to stop shouting at them for not helping. I still ask them to help but when they don't I don't shout and nag. I also promised myself I would decorate and do all the DIY jobs that never get done and finish sorting the garden that X started etc etc etc
But it is quite simply not possible. I am exhausted and getting nowhere. Now I have stopped shouting and nagging my daughters have stopped doing anything. I did tell the oldest that I wasn't going to feed her dog anymore and she had to do it herself. As far as she knows the poor thing has not been fed for four days now (obviously I have fed her dog for her). I sweep and mop the floors downstairs and wash the dishes after my shift at work before I walk my dog and go to bed but when I get up in the morning there are dishes in the sink again and DD's dog has shit on the floor and they've just left it to be stood in and trailed around the house.
Every day is an endless cycle of work, cleaning, DIY, gardening, and on and on but the house still does not look any better in fact it looks worse because all of X's things were brought here when we sold his house, so I now have 2 houses worth of furniture and all his clothes and trinkets piled up in boxes everywhere and I started stripping wallpaper, so we went from dating decor to no decor.
The decorating is still not finished. I've been trying for 3 months now and have papered one wall and mostly fixed the front garden and half of the back garden. That's it. In 3 months that is all I have managed. The day-to-day cleaning seems to take all my time.
I work four days on, four days off, 12-hour shifts. By the time I finish a four-day run at work, the entire house needs a deep clean because no-one has done anything at all besides the floors and dishes that I do.
Before I read those messages I had 2 full-time jobs but still had time to read. I was learning to code and studying for a CCNA certificate. Now I only have 1 job but have zero time to myself. I've put my degree and CCNA on hold and I cannot remember the last time I had the time or energy to pick up my Kindle.
What am I doing wrong?